


Stolen

by Lulubellamo3



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Drama, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Porn, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Betrayal, Bondage, Bondage and Discipline, Choking, Cock Tease, Daryl Dixon Smut, Dom Negan (Walking Dead), Drama, Drama & Romance, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Gags, Hurt Daryl Dixon, Hurt Rick, Imprisonment, Jealous Negan (Walking Dead), Jealous Rick, Mind Games, Mind Manipulation, Multiple Orgasms, Mutual Non-Con, My First Smut, Negan Being Negan (Walking Dead), Negan Smut (Walking Dead), Negan Smut Week (Walking Dead), Non-Consensual Bondage, Non-Consensual Touching, Oral Sex, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Original Character(s), Plot, Plot Twists, Polyamorous Character, Polygamy, Porn With Plot, Possessive Negan (Walking Dead), Possessive Rick, Protective Daryl Dixon, Protective Rick, Psychological Drama, Punishment, Rick Being an Asshole, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Rough Body Play, Rough Kissing, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sexy Negan (Walking Dead), Shameless Smut, Smut, Spanking, Strip Tease, Swearing, Teasing, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, With A Twist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2020-10-25 11:35:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 55,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20723564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lulubellamo3/pseuds/Lulubellamo3
Summary: You're new to Alexandria after Rick finds you injured in the woods. You've heard all about the man named Negan and the stranglehold he and the Saviors have over Alexandria, over Rick, but you haven't yet met him... until a towering man with a baseball bat shows up unexpectedly at the gate during your first shift on guard duty. You're determined to hate him for what he's doing to Rick, but he's determined to change that, whatever it takes.





	1. Discovered

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever fanfic - there will be lots of smut but also plenty of character development and drama. Be warned, this includes a fair amount of non-consensual elements and violence, so please don't read it if you don't like that kind of thing! I've experienced non-con myself firsthand so I'm fully aware of the real psychological effects it can have and I don't pretend it to be anything but heinous in real life - this is just smut and fiction, not to be taken seriously. Hope you enjoy! I'm pretty busy but I'll be adding chapters as quickly as I can!

_Bang. Bang. Bang._

Your heart jumps into your throat as you spin around to see the silhouette of a tall man striking the metal gate with what looked like a baseball bat.

'Lil' pigs! Lil' pigs!' Comes a deep, gravelly voice. 'Let. Me. In!' The man sings with a playful tone that makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

It's your first shift on guard duty after Rick and Michonne found you lying in the woods, covered in several months worth of dirt, sweat and walker blood, and sporting a bullet wound in the thigh that should have killed you. To this day you still have no idea where it came from. They were the first people you'd seen in almost a year after your group was overrun by walkers back in North Carolina.

You'd been on foot ever since, following whatever road happened to be beneath you, grief having dumped you in a state of utter emptiness. You ate, you drank, you walked, you slept. You ate, you drank, you walked, you slept — barely aware of the time that passed.

One day you had ventured off into the woods to avoid a herd of walkers you'd spotted on the road ahead. You'd gone much further in than you knew was good for you — your sense of direction had never been the best. You were lost within an hour of leaving the road behind, and that was when it had hit you. The bullet, driving deep into your thigh. The pain was like nothing you had ever experienced and you blacked out almost immediately.

The next thing you had known was the gentle rocking and bumping of metal beneath your body, the purr of an engine, and the murmur of voices somewhere behind you. The following week had passed in a haze of pain and hallucinations. When you'd finally broken through the other side, you'd woken to find yourself lying in a bed — a bed! You'd almost forgotten the feeling of comfort — your leg wrapped in a tight bandage and a gun pointing directly between your eyes.

'How many walkers have you killed?' A rough voice had growled quietly.

It had taken a few minutes to coax you into a state of consciousness solid enough to answer Rick's questions, but eventually he had decided to let you stay. And you could not be more grateful. They had fixed you up, knowing not even so much as your name, and once you'd proven your trustworthiness, they had settled you into your own house in Alexandria. You instantly became one of their own.

But they were plagued by a group that called themselves the 'Saviors', led by a heinous tyrant named Negan. You hadn't yet come across them, but the permanent looks of fear in everyone's eyes was unmistakable. And today that fear rose like acid in their throats as they now gathered at the gate.

_Bang. Bang. Bang._

'Come on now, Pricky Boy, Daddy don't like to be kept waitin'!' The stranger cooed, pacing back and forth along the length of the gate, swinging the bat lazily at his side.

You muster up as much courage as you can, stride towards the gate and wrench it open. The sharp grating noise rings loudly in your ears, revealing a cohort of trucks teeming with men armed to the teeth. And a tall man wrapped in a black leather jacket, a red scarf around his neck and a sly grin forming beneath his salt-and-pepper stubble as his eyes fall on you.

'Well, well, well,' the man says, the tip of his tongue tracing slowly across his lower lip. His eyes roam over you, a hint of something in them that makes your toes curl and your heart beat faster in your throat. 'Now whatdo we have here?'

Before you have a chance to answer, hurried footsteps approach from behind you. Suddenly Rick grabs your wrist, pulling you away with such force that you stumble, almost falling to the ground as your injured leg threatens to give way beneath you.

'Negan,' Rick utters, not taking his eyes off of the towering man.

So this is the infamous leader of the Saviors. Fear bubbles inside you and you feel the familiar rush of adrenaline racing through your veins, lighting your body on fire and filling your muscles with a strength you've come to enjoy since the world turned. It had always been the thing that had stirred you on, given you the will to keep moving. Whatever grief and anxiety and emptiness you felt, this sensation made you come alive, and you truly lived for it, relishing in the heightened power of your body.

'There you are, Prick! I was beginning to think you'd forgotten about me,' Negan pouted sardonically, swinging the baseball bat over his shoulder.

You peer around Rick, adrenaline-fuelled curiosity getting the better of you as you feel the animal need to size up your threat. Your stomach drops when you spot the tangles of barbed wire wrapped around the bat now balancing lazily on Negan's shoulder. Lucille.

You spot the faint red of blood staining the sharp metal spikes and feel your mouth go suddenly dry, remembering Carl telling you about Abraham and Glenn. But the adrenaline pumping through you encourages you to step around Rick and join him at his side. Your instincts tell you that Negan is not a man in front of whom you want to appear weak.

'Everything's in the back of the truck,' Rick gestures over his shoulder to the truck loaded with supplies. The injustice of it makes your blood boil and you feel your courage rise with it.

But Negan ignores Rick. Instead, his eyes fall once more onto you. Tilting his head back slightly, he surveys you with the same mischievous grin as before.

'Now who is _this_?' He points Lucille directly at you, throwing his hips forward cockily as he takes a step towards you.

Rick's eyes flit momentarily to yours. He steps deliberately between you and Negan.

'What do you care? She's no one,' Rick growls, the menace in his voice immediately giving him away.

You hope Negan doesn't pick up the threat in his tone. And to your surprise he simply laughs, arching his back and swinging Lucille beside his leg.

'Now let's not forget who's in charge here,' he chuckles. 'You belong to _me_. That means everything you have' - he throws his arms wide, gesturing to the whole of Alexandria - 'is _mine,_' he smiles cockily, his eyes growing darker as he treads slowly towards Rick until his face is inches away from his.

'Who are you?' He purrs.

Rick's chin drops to his chest for a moment and he shifts his weight uncomfortably. Then he looks back up to Negan, the fight gone from his eyes, intoning mechanically, 'I'm Negan.'

'That. You. _Are!_' Negan crows, the skin-crawlingly playful tone back in place, hips thrusting forward as he rests Lucille on his shoulder. 'So I'll fuckin' ask you again, Prick. Who is this lovely young lady you're so _obviously _wishin' to hide from me?'

Head bowed, Rick steps aside, allowing you to come into view. He looks up at you from beneath his eyelashes with a terrifying mixture of sadness and fear, his eyes making contact with yours only for a split second before dropping them to the floor again. Long enough to convey what he can't say aloud: _I'm sorry._

'My name's Y/N,' you step forward, standing up to your full height and raising your head confidently. The sweet mixture of adrenaline and hatred for this man - who reduces Rick to a mere shadow of himself with so little effort - courses through your tense muscles. You refuse to look weak.

Negan scans over you, slowly and unashamedly taking in every inch of your body: the tight jeans that hug your waist, the loose shirt revealing just a hint of cleavage. You stand your ground, resisting the urge to cover your arms over your chest while he undresses you with his eyes, running his tongue along his lower lip and sucking it between his teeth before his gaze finally comes up to meet yours.

He burns right through you with such intensity that it takes everything in you to maintain your stare. A shiver runs down your spine as he takes a step towards you. You ignore it and try to channel as much loathing through your eyes as possible, hoping he'll sense the waves of hatred rolling off of you.

'And wheredid you come from, baby? I ain't never seen you here before, and there ain't no way I'd forget a face like yours,' he growls seductively, making your skin prickle.

He's inches away from you now, his hot breath tickling your cheek. You stare resolutely up at him as you reply.

'Rick and Michonne found me a few weeks ago in the woods. I was dying, and they saved me. I've been recovering in the infirmary, where I've heard all about the _shit _you pull around here,' you spit at him.

You watch savagely as Negan's eyes flash and the smug grin falls from his face. Mustering as much venomous sarcasm as possible, you finish, 'It's a pleasureto finally meet you, _Negan__._'

Something dark crosses his eyes but his face is composed before you're sure you even saw it. He steps back, chuckling softly.

'Well, I think I _like _you, darlin',' he mocks, his deep, gravelly voice dripping with arrogance. 'I gotta feelin' you ain't one to hide what you're thinkin', Y/N. And you know what?' He closes the remaining distance between you in one large stride until his lips are almost brushing against yours.

He looks down at your mouth, taking his lip between his teeth before flicking his eyes up to meet yours.

'I fuckin' _love_ that in a woman.'

You're suddenly aware of how quickly your breaths are coming, your chest heaving as you feel your face flush and your body shiver. You hasten to recompose yourself, embarrassed and disgusted by your body's reaction to Negan's proximity. He seems to sense your discomfort and gives you a wink, glancing down at your chest momentarily before turning to Rick.

'So... I'm gonna take this one with me,' he says casually. 'I'm a wife down now that poor ol' Sherry's popped it, and my balls are just _achin'_ for somethin' _fresh..._ you know what I mean, Prick?'

He grins malevolently at Rick, relishing in the anger rising in Rick's eyes before they fall, defeated, to the floor. His voice is barely more than a whisper when he finally replies.

'Please don't.'

Fear bubbles inside of you again as you watch Negan's eyes narrow.

'What did you say? I didn't quite hear you,' Negan growls quietly, his voice darkening. Rick meets him with a desperate look on his face.

'Please, Negan,' he begs, his voice cracking slightly. 'Not her.' Rick glances at you and you feel your chest constrict when you see the pain in his eyes. 'Take me instead, I beg you.'

Negan laughs mirthlessly. 'Ohh Rick, you're not tellin' me you have some warm 'n fuckin' fuzzy _feelings _for this whore now, are you?'

Rick keeps his head bowed, mumbling something incoherent under his breath.

'What was that?' Negan mocks, pushing his face aggressively close to Rick's and holding his hand behind his ear. 'Speak up, Prick, nice and loud_._ I think we _all_ wanna hear about how this lil' fuckin' slut here makes your floppy lil' dick good an' _hard _at night!'

Pure hatred boils inside you. You stare at Negan, scarcely believing the words falling from his disgusting mouth as you helplessly watch him humiliate Rick right in front of you. In front of everyone. Using_ you _as the tool with which to grind him into the dirt.

You're just about to run forward and plunge your knife into Negan's skull — not caring about the hundred bullets that would surely pierce your body before the blade could even touch his skin — when Rick whispers something in Negan's ear. You strain to hear the words tumbling from his mouth in broken gasps, but you spot a tear fall to the ground.

Then he turns around and walks away from you, striding back towards his house without so much as a fleeting glance in your direction. Negan remains rooted to the spot for several moments, the crowd around him silent, waiting for his verdict. A devilish grin that makes your skin crawl spreads over his face as he turns slowly to you.

'Well, honey, looks like you're comin' with me.'


	2. Confined

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You wake up in a pitch-black cell with no idea where you are, until a visitor arrives with a proposal for you. You know what he's trying to do, but how long can you resist? Will Rick come to your rescue?

You wake up to find yourself in total, impenetrable darkness. Silence presses on your eardrums like you're a hundred feet under water. Your stomach twists with hunger and your throat aches, your tongue rubbing against the roof of your mouth like sandpaper. Your head feels as heavy as your body, a fog obscuring your mind and making your thoughts too hazy to concentrate. You grope blindly around you in the darkness, trying to figure out where you are, but all you feel is cold concrete.

Then you hear something in the distance. Footsteps. And whistling — just two notes repeated over and over with a slight pause in between. The sound makes your insides freeze. The whistler's steps stop somewhere close to you and the mounting pain in your lungs calls desperately for you to breathe. A long, deafening grating sound fills the silence as a door in front of you opens. Your eyes sting at the sudden brightness now spilling into the room.

'Hey there,' comes a deep, gravelly voice. 'Comfy?'

Your eyes take several moments to adjust to the light. You look up to see the blurry outline of a man towering over your, balancing something long on his shoulder. Your surroundings slowly come into focus. You're sat huddled on a cold, concrete floor in a tiny, featureless room barely big enough to lay down in.

'Girl, you look like _shit_!' Negan smirks down at you.

'Fuck you,' you try to shout, but all that comes out of your dry throat is a course groan scarcely louder than a whisper.

'Now darlin', you may be _hot_ as _fuck_,' he growls in that sadistically playful tone. 'But I just can't allow that kinda attitude.'

He takes a step towards you and you suddenly become aware of your pathetically diminished form. His legs are inches from your face. You look up to see his crotch almost parallel with your eyes. You hastily try to shuffle backwards but your back is pressed up against the wall, refusing to yield. Negan chuckles menacingly at your reaction.

'Aw now honey, you should feel fuckin' privilegedto have my junk all up in your face! Do you know how many women would give their fuckin' _tits _to be in your position?' He coos arrogantly.

'You're delusional,' you croak.

You try to muster up as much volume as possible in the hope of concealing your fear, but the adrenaline that had rushed to your aid earlier has abandoned your body to a state of weakness you despise.

'What do you want?'

Negan crouches down in front of you, setting Lucille on the floor — you feel a tiny rush of relief — his face now inches from yours. You turn your head away in disgust at his proximity, but he hooks a gloved finger under your chin, forcing you to look straight at him.

'I wanna screw your fuckin' brains out,' he whispers slowly, his hot breath brushing across your face and mingling with an intoxicating smell of tobacco, whisky and leather.

To your surprise, you find yourself laughing in his face. The whole idea seems so utterly ludicrous that you're sure he isn't serious. He's just fucking with you in an attempt to humiliate you in the same way he did to Rick.

'Go fuck yourself, Negan. I'm sure your arrogant asshole would love that,' you smirk, imitating his cocky expression.

'Oh darlin', while my dick is definitely fuckin' big enough to reach, I think you'd find it _much _more enjoyable elsewhere,' he flashes a line of perfect white teeth as he grins at you, his gloved thumb tracing over your slightly parted lips.

You sense yourself beginning to tremble and it takes everything in you to fight the fog bearing down on your mind. Your body aches from the fatigue of thirst and hunger, and the awkward positioning of your body on the concrete floor.

'I highly doubt it,' you sneer, desperate to hide the weakness invading your body with every passing second.

Negan lets out a low growl, stroking his lower lip with the tip of his tongue as he gazes down at your mouth, raising goosebumps all over your skin. He leans slowly around to your ear, his teeth grazing your earlobe just for a second. You freeze, your breath catching and your heart leaping into your throat.

'Now that _is_ a shame, Y/N,' he whispers, sending another shiver down your spine.

You're not sure if this time it wasn't almost pleasant, but you push the thought disgustedly from your mind before the fog descending over you has a chance to screw with your senses. Suddenly you're left feeling cold as Negan stands up, Lucille back over his shoulder. He turns towards the door, the heat of his body disappearing and sending emptier shivers through your body.

'I'll have 'em bring some food and water to you, doll. Don't want you fuckin' dyin' on my ass now, do we?' He smirks down at you one last time before starting to heave the door closed. 'I'll see you in a few days, honey. Give you some time to think on my offer.'

He shuts the door with a wink and another flash of perfect teeth before you're left in total darkness once more.

* * *

You don't how many hours pass until the door finally grinds open again. The light blinds you for a moment before an unfamiliar face comes into view. You know for sure you haven't seen him before; it would be impossible to forget the scars defiling one side of his face, drooping over his eye and mouth. A mess of a long, shaggy blonde hair frames his thin figure. His eyes are empty and expressionless, and they avoid meeting yours.

'Here, eat up,' the man mumbles monotonously, setting a tray on the floor beside you.

He checks quickly over his shoulder before shrugging off his jacket and throwing it at your feet. Then he backs straight out of your cell, shutting the door again and plunging you back into darkness.

After shrugging on the jacket - the stranger's lingering body-heat warming you through - you reach straight for the tray, trying to work out by touch what you've been given. You find something squashy, grab hold of it and shove it hungrily into your mouth, which instantly bursts alive with flavour. Just as you decide it's a blueberry muffin, you're gulping the last of it down and reaching again for the tray.

You grope around for a moment, feeling nothing but hard plastic. Then your hand collides with something which now rolls across the floor. You grab it and hear the blissful sound of liquid. Fumbling for the cap, you drain the bottle in one go, only to find it was half-empty.

Anger and desperation bubbles up inside you and you leap for the door, banging your fists on it as hard as you can and swearing at the top of your voice until your throat is numb and you can't make another sound. No one comes.

You slump back to the floor, pulling the jacket tighter around you. As the silence presses in on you, you curl up in a ball and start to cry. The reality of your situation hits you with the same force as the bullet that pierced your thigh.

You didn't know this Negan guy very well, but you were beginning to see what everyone meant when they said that he _always _gets exactly what he wants, when he wants it. With food and weapons, you can understand — people do what they need to in order to survive in this world. They look out for their own before anybody else. But this? This was just sick. And you're still not sure that you believe him.

For starters, you've heard about his collection of wives whose sole purpose it was to fulfil his every filthy, carnal desire. So why on earth would he be interested in you? Secondly, you know his game was to break people. Grind them down until they are nothing but a slave to his will. Whether by humiliating you, killing the people you care about, or torturing you until you can't take any more.

'He's not going to break me,' you whisper to the empty cell, swallowing your sobs in defiance.

You lay there for an indeterminate amount of time. Eventually your mind wanders to Rick. Surely he will try to get you back? You think back to the last time you saw him, when he said something to Negan before leaving you behind for good. You have no idea what he could have told him but suddenly you feel a hatred burning inside of you, and you despise it.

You can't feel that way towards Rick, the man who saved your life. Who welcomed you into his family like an old friend. Who trusted you despite knowing next to nothing about you. But... he left you to _him_, knowing exactly who he is and what he's capable of.Tears roll down your cheeks uncontrollably as your body shakes with renewed sobs. At some point you fall asleep.  
  



	3. Struggle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan pays you a visit and you take your chance to escape, but it goes horribly wrong. Your imprisonment begins to break you and you can't help pondering the alternative: taking Negan up on his offer.

'Wakey wakey, princess.'

You bury your head further between your arms, tucking your knees into your chest, only stirring gently in your sleep. A small moan of annoyance escapes you when something prods your shoulder, trying to bring you back to consciousness. You hold tightly onto your stupor, willing your mind to return to blissful nothingness again.

'Aw come on, baby. Daddy don't like to be kept waitin'.'

Your eyes fly open as your brain registers that familiar drool, flashing back to the silhouetted figure banging on the gate outside Alexandria: _'Come on now, Pricky Boy. Daddy don't like to be kept waitin'!'_

'Ah, she _lives_!' Negan cries in his deep, gravelly voice.

'Leave me alone,' you whimper into your arms, keeping your head tucked where you won't be able to see him. But already his aroma invades you, telling you he's close.

'So you won't be wantin' all these goodiesI brought you, honey?'

You jump, his voice now coming from directly above you. You slowly lift your head out from under your arm, staying lying down, the energy gone from your body. The door is open by a crack, allowing a thin sliver of light to filter into the cell, enough to dimly illuminate the man sitting down against the wall beside you, his legs stretched out and his hips just inches from your face.

You vaguely consider making a break for the door, but you know he would barely have to lift a finger to bring you crashing back to the ground again.

'Can I have something to eat?' You ask, barely caring how pathetic you sound.

Something stirs feebly inside you, reminding you not to appear weak in front of him. But every word and movement feels like a mountainous effort, so you ignore it. Negan chuckles.

'What's the magic word?' He drools teasingly. You swallow your pride as your stomach contracts painfully.

'Please?'

'Of _course _you can, doll! You only had to ask,' he chimes playfully.

The next words are out of your mouth before you can give them a second thought.

'Can I go home too... please?'

You're met with several moments of silence and you know you've already pushed it too far. You try to sit up, your head swimming as you straighten your back against the wall. The room starts to spin around you and you slump sideways, sliding down it.

'Oh fuck... Dwight, get your fuckin' ass in here!' Negan calls over his shoulder, breaking the silence, his deep voice vibrating through your body.

You black out before your head hits the floor.

* * *

The smell of cooking stirs you into consciousness. Your stomach groans loudly, aware that food is close by.

'It's nearly ready,' comes a quiet voice.

You open your eyes, scanning the room around you. You're lying on something soft and so unbelievably comfortable that you can already feel the tension in your limbs melting away into the fabric. The delicious waft of chilli reaches your nose and your mouth instantly starts to water. 

In front of you stands a glass coffee table which has been laid with a plate, cutlery and a napkin. A jug of water complete with ice and lemon sits beside a glass. You swing your legs hastily off of the couch and reach for the jug. Ignoring the glass, you down it. The cool water washes through you like a breath of fresh air.

'Want some more?' The man's voice comes from somewhere behind you. It's gentle and familiar. 

'Yes please,' you exhale desperately, turning your nose towards the source of the smell.

Dwight's scarred face swims into view and his eyes meet yours for a split second before he grabs the jug and fills it up at a sink on the wall behind you. A microwave stands whirring beside it, emitting the tantalising smell of chilli into the warm air. It pings and Dwight opens it, picking up the bowl and bringing it to the coffee table. You reach quickly for the fork as he spills the contents onto you plate, afraid he might take it from you just to torture you further.

'Eat it slowly, Y/N. You ain't what nothin' in days,' he mumbles, still not meeting your eyes.

He sets the bowl on a mat beside the plate, still half full, and leaves the room without another word.

You start to shovel the food down your neck, ignoring the burn travelling down your throat. But after four mouthfuls your stomach starts to protest. You put the food down resentfully and set about exploring your surroundings, your body beginning to come back to life.

The room is large and comfortable. Several couches line the expansive walls from which unusual works of abstract art hang. At the other end of the room lies an enormous bed. A nightstand sits beside it, on top of which lies a pile of books.

The couch you're sitting on stands beside a bookshelf beneath a large window. A pair of black curtains are drawn across it, a soft glow coming from a number of lamps dotted about the room. 

You pick up the plate again, unable to wait any longer, and continue shovelling food into your mouth, ignoring your stomach's protests. You only just finish when the door behind you opens.

Negan stands just beyond the threshold, Lucille balanced lazily on his shoulder and his other hand in the pocket of his jeans. A devilish grin tugs at the corners of his lips.

'How d'you like my room?' He growls, a seductive edge to his deep voice.

You can't seem to move. Your arms hover strangely in mid-air, still clutching your plate. A new kind of fear bubbles inside you as you watch him cross the threshold, swaggering slowly towards you with his hips thrust forwards.

The devilish grin spreads wider across his rugged features as he watches the cogs turning in your head, trying to figure out what his next move will be. You know one thing for sure: you're not going home.

'I'm glad to see I've struck you fuckin' dumb with my presence, doll. An' I ain't even naked!' He mocks cockily, setting himself on the couch opposite you and propping Lucille on the floor beside him.

You're relieved that for now at least the coffee table creates a good distance between you.

'You've got some food on your pretty lil' face, honey. Want me to get that for you?' He grins, flashing his perfect teeth, his eyes alight.

You hastily rub the napkin over your mouth, flushing furiously. You hate yourself for feeling so embarrassed.

'Why am I here, Negan?' You snap defensively, attempting to cover your embarrassment by standing up so that for once you're above him.

'I thought you might be hungry, princess! You passed out before I could show you those goodies,' he leers salaciously.

You feel sick. You hate yourself for eating his food, enjoying the comfort of his couch... Every inch of your skin feels tainted with his vile presence.

'Aren't you gonna thank me?' His voice turns darker and he licks his lips slowly as he looks up at you, his eyes falling to your heaving chest panting in anger. 'Ohh doll, I fuckin' _love _makin' you mad.'

'Why am I here, Negan?!' You shout, at last finding some real volume with which to spit his name.

He rises slowly from his couch, staring at you with an intensity that makes your heart pound faster in your chest. You can't afford to falter now that your strength is finally returning.

'Goddamn doll, you've got some big fuckin' lady-nuts on you! Am I gonna need to put you back in that cell, let you dry out some more?'

You can't hide the fear that flickers across your face at his words. You know you won't be able to come back from it if he sends you back there again, certain it will be for an even longer stretch of indeterminate time.

'Or would you like to be a good girl and shut up so you can hear my fuckin' offer?'

The fight leaves you as quickly as it came, exhaustion taking its place once more. Fatigue overwhelms you, and to your intense shame you feel tears stinging the edges of your eyes.

You drop your head, trying to hide them, and intone monotonously, 'Can I hear your offer... please?'

Keeping your eyes resolutely on the floor, you hear Negan's boots walking around the coffee table and coming to stand next to you.

'Turn an' face me,' he orders, a new commanding edge to his voice that sends an odd sensation running through your spine, coming to rest in your abdomen.

Your mind begins to race, unsure what this new feeling was but knowing it terrified you out of your wits. You do as he asks, turning on the spot so that you're now looking at his boots. Your eyes fall momentarily on the bulge in his jeans and your heart pounds in your ears, the sensation in your abdomen suddenly quivering. You look hastily away, focusing instead on one of the paintings on the wall behind him. But you can't see it.

Your mind becomes a battlefield. Adrenaline pumps through your veins, but instead of flowing to your muscles, preparing you to fight, you find it flooding to your groin. You're suddenly slave to your body's reactions, and the sickness in your stomach at the thought of Negan is replaced by a sadistic animal desire. Tears start to roll down your cheeks as you fight desperately for your sanity, terrified of the path that this side of you was trying to drag you down.

'Why don't you clean yourself up, darlin'. Not gonna lie but you stink of that fuckin' cell,' Negan growls quietly.

'Bathroom's through that door there,' he gestures to a door next to the painting you're staring at; you hadn't spotted it before. You don't wait to be told twice. 'But hurry back now, doll, my balls are _achin_',' he calls after you with a mocking laugh just before you slam the door and drop to the floor, your head in your hands and tears flowing freely down your face.

You want to scream. Your whole body shakes violently and you wonder whether you're going into shock. The quivering in your groin disappears, but its feeling is sharp in your memory. You hate yourself. How can you possibly feel like this? Are you truly that far gone? Has the world really screwed you that much that you would actually be drawn to a man like him?

You try to remember the person you were before the world turned. You'd never been attracted to arrogance or danger. You had always preferred the sweeter, innocent ones you could trust, where you could feel in control. But it'd been years since you were her. Since then, you'd lost your entire family. Everyone you'd known, in fact. Now, you lived in a world without control.

The group you'd found before Alexandria had been strong. You'd fought well together and you learned quickly how to survive. After they had died and you had been left on your own, you grew empty. The only thing that made you come alive was fighting; you'd come to relish in the adrenaline kick it gave you to kill. But you only killed walkers. You'd never killed a human in your entire life, and you wouldn't know how to. Negan, on the other hand... he had killed more than he could probably count, and he seemed to enjoy it.

But then again, wasn't it always necessary when he did? You think about how you have to look out for your own in this world if you have any hope of surviving — wasn't that what Negan was doing? You'd heard about the number of people Negan had working for him in his compound and his outposts — they were all alive because of him. If Negan died, how quickly would they fall apart, tear at each other's throats for dominance?

While one dominated them all, they fell in line, and as long as you followed his rules you were protected, fed, sheltered. Hell, you even had the chance of a real life; he'd created something to live for.

Negan might kill when he had to to make people fall in line, saving the larger whole for the sake of the smaller one, but he had never _got_ people killed. His rules ensured that people were safe as long as they lived by them. They were in place to protect people.

You shake your head, squeezing your eyes shut and gripping your hair. Were you really defending him?! And yet here he is, offering you _his _food, _his _shower in the hope that you will take them and join the world he's trying to build, trying to protect. Providing you give him what he wants...

You shake your head again. He'd put you in that cell, he'd starved you! But wasn't that just his way to ensure that you would behave, that you wouldn't run off and kill a bunch of his men in rebellion? That you wouldn't try to kill him and watch as everything he had built fell apart? Was it all just to look after his own people? He didn't know you from Adam — how could he take the chance? Even Rick had to threaten you before he could trust you...

'How're you doin' in there, princess?' His voice snaps you out of your thoughts and you wonder how long you'd been sitting there.

You get steadily to your feet, relieved to find you're no longer shaking, and cross to the sink to look at yourself in the mirror. Your face is red and blotchy and your hair is matted. You step out of your clothes. A thin layer of grime covers your body.

You ignore Negan's question as you cross to the shower and turn it on. Spotting a comb on a chest of drawers by the sink, you drag it roughly through your hair. It takes several minutes to untangle the mess and your scalp feels raw when you step into the shower.

The sensation of the hot water running over your body was euphoric. You grab a bottle of something from a rack and lather it over yourself, inhaling the sweet, fresh smell of pine and mint. You take as much time as you dare to scrub every inch of yourself clean before stepping out of the shower, still mulling over the argument you had just had with yourself.

Rubbing the water from your eyes, you reach blindly for a towel. Your fingers curl around soft fabric and you rub yourself down with it before wrapping it around your chest. Then you open your eyes to find Negan leaning against the doorframe, watching you intensely.

'Well ain't you a sight for sore eyes,' he growls, tracing his tongue along his lower lip then taking it between his teeth.

His gaze runs slowly up from your legs to your face, holding your terrified stare as he steps slowly towards you.


	4. Temptation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been days since your escape attempt and you feel yourself beginning to break. Just as you're sure you'll never leave the confines of the cell, you find yourself waking up in Negan's room, battling with your conscience as your attraction towards him grows.

'Wakey wakey, princess.'

You bury your head further between your arms, tucking your knees into your chest, only stirring gently in your sleep. A small moan of annoyance escapes you when something prods your shoulder, trying to bring you back to consciousness. You hold tightly onto your stupor, willing your mind to return to blissful nothingness again.

'Aw come on, baby. Daddy don't like to be kept waitin'.'

Your eyes fly open as your brain registers that familiar drool, flashing back to the silhouetted figure banging on the gate outside Alexandria: _'Come on now, Pricky Boy. Daddy don't like to be kept waitin'!'_

'Ah, she _lives_!' Negan cries in his deep, gravelly voice.

'Leave me alone,' you whimper into your arms, keeping your head tucked where you won't be able to see him. But already his aroma invades you, telling you he's close.

'So you won't be wantin' all these goodiesI brought you, honey?'

You jump, his voice now coming from directly above you. You slowly lift your head out from under your arm, staying lying down, the energy gone from your body. The door is open by a crack, allowing a thin sliver of light to filter into the cell, enough to dimly illuminate the man sitting down against the wall beside you, his legs stretched out and his hips just inches from your face.

You vaguely consider making a break for the door, but you know he would barely have to lift a finger to bring you crashing back to the ground again.

'Can I have something to eat?' You ask, barely caring how pathetic you sound.

Something stirs feebly inside you, reminding you not to appear weak in front of him. But every word and movement feels like a mountainous effort, so you ignore it. Negan chuckles.

'What's the magic word?' He drools teasingly. You swallow your pride as your stomach contracts painfully.

'Please?'

'Of _course _you can, doll! You only had to ask,' he chimes playfully.

The next words are out of your mouth before you can give them a second thought.

'Can I go home too... please?'

You're met with several moments of silence and you know you've already pushed it too far. You try to sit up, your head swimming as you straighten your back against the wall. The room starts to spin around you and you slump sideways, sliding down it.

'Oh fuck... Dwight, get your fuckin' ass in here!' Negan calls over his shoulder, breaking the silence, his deep voice vibrating through your body.

You black out before your head hits the floor.

* * *

The smell of cooking stirs you into consciousness. Your stomach groans loudly, aware that food is close by.

'It's nearly ready,' comes a quiet voice.

You open your eyes, scanning the room around you. You're lying on something soft and so unbelievably comfortable that you can already feel the tension in your limbs melting away into the fabric. The delicious waft of chilli reaches your nose and your mouth instantly starts to water. 

In front of you stands a glass coffee table which has been laid with a plate, cutlery and a napkin. A jug of water complete with ice and lemon sits beside a glass. You swing your legs hastily off of the couch and reach for the jug. Ignoring the glass, you down it. The cool water washes through you like a breath of fresh air.

'Want some more?' The man's voice comes from somewhere behind you. It's gentle and familiar. 

'Yes please,' you exhale desperately, turning your nose towards the source of the smell.

Dwight's scarred face swims into view and his eyes meet yours for a split second before he grabs the jug and fills it up at a sink on the wall behind you. A microwave stands whirring beside it, emitting the tantalising smell of chilli into the warm air. It pings and Dwight opens it, picking up the bowl and bringing it to the coffee table. You reach quickly for the fork as he spills the contents onto you plate, afraid he might take it from you just to torture you further.

'Eat it slowly, Y/N. You ain't what nothin' in days,' he mumbles, still not meeting your eyes.

He sets the bowl on a mat beside the plate, still half full, and leaves the room without another word.

You start to shovel the food down your neck, ignoring the burn travelling down your throat. But after four mouthfuls your stomach starts to protest. You put the food down resentfully and set about exploring your surroundings, your body beginning to come back to life.

The room is large and comfortable. Several couches line the expansive walls from which unusual works of abstract art hang. At the other end of the room lies an enormous bed. A nightstand sits beside it, on top of which lies a pile of books.

The couch you're sitting on stands beside a bookshelf beneath a large window. A pair of black curtains are drawn across it, a soft glow coming from a number of lamps dotted about the room. 

You pick up the plate again, unable to wait any longer, and continue shovelling food into your mouth, ignoring your stomach's protests. You only just finish when the door behind you opens.

Negan stands just beyond the threshold, Lucille balanced lazily on his shoulder and his other hand in the pocket of his jeans. A devilish grin tugs at the corners of his lips.

'How d'you like my room?' He growls, a seductive edge to his deep voice.

You can't seem to move. Your arms hover strangely in mid-air, still clutching your plate. A new kind of fear bubbles inside you as you watch him cross the threshold, swaggering slowly towards you with his hips thrust forwards.

The devilish grin spreads wider across his rugged features as he watches the cogs turning in your head, trying to figure out what his next move will be. You know one thing for sure: you're not going home.

'I'm glad to see I've struck you fuckin' dumb with my presence, doll. An' I ain't even naked!' He mocks cockily, setting himself on the couch opposite you and propping Lucille on the floor beside him.

You're relieved that for now at least the coffee table creates a good distance between you.

'You've got some food on your pretty lil' face, honey. Want me to get that for you?' He grins, flashing his perfect teeth, his eyes alight.

You hastily rub the napkin over your mouth, flushing furiously. You hate yourself for feeling so embarrassed.

'Why am I here, Negan?' You snap defensively, attempting to cover your embarrassment by standing up so that for once you're above him.

'I thought you might be hungry, princess! You passed out before I could show you those goodies,' he leers salaciously.

You feel sick. You hate yourself for eating his food, enjoying the comfort of his couch... Every inch of your skin feels tainted with his vile presence.

'Aren't you gonna thank me?' His voice turns darker and he licks his lips slowly as he looks up at you, his eyes falling to your heaving chest panting in anger. 'Ohh doll, I fuckin' _love _makin' you mad.'

'Why am I here, Negan?!' You shout, at last finding some real volume with which to spit his name.

He rises slowly from his couch, staring at you with an intensity that makes your heart pound faster in your chest. You can't afford to falter now that your strength is finally returning.

'Goddamn doll, you've got some big fuckin' lady-nuts on you! Am I gonna need to put you back in that cell, let you dry out some more?'

You can't hide the fear that flickers across your face at his words. You know you won't be able to come back from it if he sends you back there again, certain it will be for an even longer stretch of indeterminate time.

'Or would you like to be a good girl and shut up so you can hear my fuckin' offer?'

The fight leaves you as quickly as it came, exhaustion taking its place once more. Fatigue overwhelms you, and to your intense shame you feel tears stinging the edges of your eyes.

You drop your head, trying to hide them, and intone monotonously, 'Can I hear your offer... please?'

Keeping your eyes resolutely on the floor, you hear Negan's boots walking around the coffee table and coming to stand next to you.

'Turn an' face me,' he orders, a new commanding edge to his voice that sends an odd sensation running through your spine, coming to rest in your abdomen.

Your mind begins to race, unsure what this new feeling was but knowing it terrified you out of your wits. You do as he asks, turning on the spot so that you're now looking at his boots. Your eyes fall momentarily on the bulge in his jeans and your heart pounds in your ears, the sensation in your abdomen suddenly quivering. You look hastily away, focusing instead on one of the paintings on the wall behind him. But you can't see it.

Your mind becomes a battlefield. Adrenaline pumps through your veins, but instead of flowing to your muscles, preparing you to fight, you find it flooding to your groin. You're suddenly slave to your body's reactions, and the sickness in your stomach at the thought of Negan is replaced by a sadistic animal desire. Tears start to roll down your cheeks as you fight desperately for your sanity, terrified of the path that this side of you was trying to drag you down.

'Why don't you clean yourself up, darlin'. Not gonna lie but you stink of that fuckin' cell,' Negan growls quietly.

'Bathroom's through that door there,' he gestures to a door next to the painting you're staring at; you hadn't spotted it before. You don't wait to be told twice. 'But hurry back now, doll, my balls are _achin_',' he calls after you with a mocking laugh just before you slam the door and drop to the floor, your head in your hands and tears flowing freely down your face.

You want to scream. Your whole body shakes violently and you wonder whether you're going into shock. The quivering in your groin disappears, but its feeling is sharp in your memory. You hate yourself. How can you possibly feel like this? Are you truly that far gone? Has the world really screwed you that much that you would actually be drawn to a man like him?

You try to remember the person you were before the world turned. You'd never been attracted to arrogance or danger. You had always preferred the sweeter, innocent ones you could trust, where you could feel in control. But it'd been years since you were her. Since then, you'd lost your entire family. Everyone you'd known, in fact. Now, you lived in a world without control.

The group you'd found before Alexandria had been strong. You'd fought well together and you learned quickly how to survive. After they had died and you had been left on your own, you grew empty. The only thing that made you come alive was fighting; you'd come to relish in the adrenaline kick it gave you to kill. But you only killed walkers. You'd never killed a human in your entire life, and you wouldn't know how to. Negan, on the other hand... he had killed more than he could probably count, and he seemed to enjoy it.

But then again, wasn't it always necessary when he did? You think about how you have to look out for your own in this world if you have any hope of surviving — wasn't that what Negan was doing? You'd heard about the number of people Negan had working for him in his compound and his outposts — they were all alive because of him. If Negan died, how quickly would they fall apart, tear at each other's throats for dominance?

While one dominated them all, they fell in line, and as long as you followed his rules you were protected, fed, sheltered. Hell, you even had the chance of a real life; he'd created something to live for.

Negan might kill when he had to to make people fall in line, saving the larger whole for the sake of the smaller one, but he had never _got_ people killed. His rules ensured that people were safe as long as they lived by them. They were in place to protect people.

You shake your head, squeezing your eyes shut and gripping your hair. Were you really defending him?! And yet here he is, offering you _his _food, _his _shower in the hope that you will take them and join the world he's trying to build, trying to protect. Providing you give him what he wants...

You shake your head again. He'd put you in that cell, he'd starved you! But wasn't that just his way to ensure that you would behave, that you wouldn't run off and kill a bunch of his men in rebellion? That you wouldn't try to kill him and watch as everything he had built fell apart? Was it all just to look after his own people? He didn't know you from Adam — how could he take the chance? Even Rick had to threaten you before he could trust you...

'How're you doin' in there, princess?' His voice snaps you out of your thoughts and you wonder how long you'd been sitting there.

You get steadily to your feet, relieved to find you're no longer shaking, and cross to the sink to look at yourself in the mirror. Your face is red and blotchy and your hair is matted. You step out of your clothes. A thin layer of grime covers your body.

You ignore Negan's question as you cross to the shower and turn it on. Spotting a comb on a chest of drawers by the sink, you drag it roughly through your hair. It takes several minutes to untangle the mess and your scalp feels raw when you step into the shower.

The sensation of the hot water running over your body was euphoric. You grab a bottle of something from a rack and lather it over yourself, inhaling the sweet, fresh smell of pine and mint. You take as much time as you dare to scrub every inch of yourself clean before stepping out of the shower, still mulling over the argument you had just had with yourself.

Rubbing the water from your eyes, you reach blindly for a towel. Your fingers curl around soft fabric and you rub yourself down with it before wrapping it around your chest. Then you open your eyes to find Negan leaning against the doorframe, watching you intensely.

'Well ain't you a sight for sore eyes,' he growls, tracing his tongue along his lower lip then taking it between his teeth.

His gaze runs slowly up from your legs to your face, holding your terrified stare as he steps slowly towards you.


	5. Resistance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're caught in a compromising position and your resistance is tested by the scene that unfolds between you and Negan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The smut has arrived and there'll be plenty more to come! Non-con elements so please APPROACH WITH CAUTION. This is a short one just to give you a hint, I'm building it slowly but I promise it'll be good!

Negan paces slowly towards you, his eyes alight with desire. You instinctively wrap your arms around your body, shrinking into yourself as you watch him, terrified and unable to tear your eyes away from him. You know he must have been watching you since you got in the shower.

'Aw don't hide from me, doll. I already got a good fuckin' look,' he smirks, steadily closing the distance between you. 'Here's the deal, darlin': you can leave that cell tonight and stay here with me— a privilege not even my fuckin' _wives_ get — or I can send you back there for fuck knows how long. It'll give Dwight somethin' to do. Truth is, honey, I'll have you one way or another.'

Unable to help yourself, you snort, glaring at him in disgust and disbelief. Suddenly all the excuses you made for him seem ludicrous. His eyes flash, his face falling into a dark expression that makes your blood run cold.

'Or...' he strokes a finger along the top of the towel covering your chest, then hooks it ever so slightly underneath, resting it between the towel and your skin.

The contact makes your skin prickle and your breath catch in your throat, your heart pounding against his finger. You try to remind yourself of the injustice of his ultimatum, shaking your head slightly to clear it.

'... Or do I have to _persuade_ you some more?'

'I... I can't...' you mumble through rapid breaths, longing for adrenaline to save you and return the fight to your muscles.

His body is inches from yours as he looms over you, hooking a finger under your chin and forcing your head up to look at him while the other strokes lightly along your chest just beneath the top of your towel, leaving a trail of goosebumps behind.

'Please, Negan... don't...' you breathe, shivers running through your body as you watch his tongue trace gently across his lower lip.

'I can't tell if you're blushin' outta fear or 'cos you just can't resist me, doll,' he grins, flashing those perfect teeth. 'Or maybe it's a little o' both.'

He leans his face closer to yours, his eyes now fixed on your slightly parted lips as you pant, frozen to the spot. He tugs your chin up to meet his lips, gently brushing them over yours. Your body springs into action. You leap backwards, realising in horror that his finger was still hooked beneath your towel. It drops to the floor and you stand naked in front of him, frozen with fear.

His eyes roam hungrily over your body for a moment before he lunges towards you in a single stride. His hands roughly grip either side of your face and he crushes his mouth onto yours. You try desperately to push him away, your palms shoving hard into his chest. But it's like trying to move a wall as he descends over you, pushing you up against the rim of the sink that slams painfully into the small of your back.

You go to scream but he anticipates your reaction, wrapping his fingers around your throat. His other hand scrapes down your back, his fingernails digging slightly into your skin. He grabs your hip, pulling your body into his with a force that winds you. Your nipples graze across his leather jacket as his growing erection presses into your abdomen.

He catches your bottom lip between his teeth and lets out a low moan that sends a wave of something else through you. The fear in you starts to shrink as another sensation creeps through your body, washing over your mind and sending ripples down to your core.

Your head is a haze as you try desperately to resist them. You feel disconnected, watching in horror as another, darker part of you starts to claw its way to dominance. Negan releases your lips for a second and you take your chance to cry out.

'Please! Stop! I can't do this Negan, please...' you gasp through his chokehold.

To your surprise he releases the grip around your throat and hip, but before you have a chance to move he grabs your face like a vice, his body still pressed hard against yours. The pain in your lower back crescendos as the rim of the sink digs in. His breathing is fast and heavy and his cheeks are flushed, his eyes dark with lust.

'You want me to stop, doll?' He growls menacingly, his voice tinged with lust. 'I got the impression you were fuckin' enjoyin' it.' A smug grin etches across his face.

Anger rises in you with a rush of adrenaline. For a moment you think you might be able to save yourself, but you watch helplessly as the adrenaline only fuels the fire building in your core.

'Who the fuck do you think you are?' You spit at him, trying to channel the anger at yourself to him, the _cause_ of your failure.

You squirm uselessly beneath him but stop when you see him watching you, tracing his lower lip with his tongue in apparent enjoyment.

'Who am I? Darlin', you should know by now... I'm the guy who gets what he wants,' he growls quietly, the deep vibrations of his voice travelling up through his chest and reverberating through your body.

After a moment he steps away, releasing you. You grope hastily behind you to clutch at the sink as your legs give way beneath you.

He chuckles softly before saying in a light-heartedly playful tone, 'Feel free to stay the night, darlin'. I'll be in the next room if you wanna join.' He turns to leave, grabbing the door handle.

'Up to you,' he finishes with a wink, shutting the door behind him and leaving you to collapse on the floor as a wave of horrified sobs crashes down over you.


	6. Resolve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dealing with the aftermath of your encounter with Negan, you resolve to find a way to beat him at his game. But you find your resolve steadily breaking as he makes his next move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Building up to a LOT of smut in the next chapter - hope you enjoy, and thanks for reading this far! :)

You cry yourself into oblivion, but find no relief as your dreams replay the event in your head over and over. The animalistic darkness that had burned inside you blurs the memory of the sensations you'd felt, vying for dominance over your reason until you force yourself awake, terrified of what your body was starting to crave.

You'd stayed in the bathroom all night, curled up beneath the sink. Your entire body aches and your eyes sting from relentless tears. The light is still on so you have no idea what time of the day it is, and you can't hear anything in the next room. Either Negan had gone, or he's still asleep.

You stay rooted to the floor for as long as your body can stand, too scared to move in case he hears you. Eventually your joints begin to scream. Carefully unravelling yourself, you realise you're still naked. Grabbing the rim of the sink for support, you heave yourself to your feet and stare at your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes are swollen and there's the faint imprint of Negan's fingers on your neck.

You turn around and gasp at the sight of the nail scratches running the length of your back down to the bruise blossoming just above your waist. You hastily grab the towel to cover up Negan's marks and turn on the tap, guzzling the cool water into your parched throat before splashing it over your face. It soothes your clammy skin and soon you're splashing it down your whole body, dropping the towel to the floor, desperate to eradicate Negan's smell from you.

Something moves in the next room and you freeze. The blissful feeling of the cool water on your aching body had distracted you. You look around for your clothes but they've disappeared. Fear and anger bubbles inside you as you assume it to be Negan's trick to entice you out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel.

You pick it up and wrap it tightly around yourself, a new determination growing. You're not going to shy away from his games and let him think he's winning. The dark craving inside of you purrs in silent triumph, thinking you're finally releasing yourself to its will. You tell yourself you're just doing whatever it takes to beat him, even if it means having to play the game.

You tiptoe quietly to the door, blessing the practice you'd had at sneaking up on walkers. The sound of running water reaches your ears and curiosity gets the better of you. You creak the door open an inch; peering through you see Dwight with his back to you, bending over the sink at the far end of the room. You wait to hear the sound of Negan's gravelly voice coming from the bed but aside from Dwight, there's silence. Heart thumping loudly in your throat, you gather your courage and stride out of the room with as much confidence as you can feign.

Dwight turns around, his eyes falling to your towel and then to the ground as he mumbles, 'Got you some breakfast. He's not here, you can breathe.'

You scan the room to check and exhale in relief, realising you'd been holding your breath.

'There's some clothes on the bed,' he says quietly, shutting off the tap and lifting a bowl of fresh fruit from the sink. He places it on the coffee table beside a fresh jug of water.

Your eyes turn straight to the food and you settle yourself down on the couch in your towel. Somehow, Dwight's inability to even look you in the eye makes you feel perfectly safe wearing next to nothing in front of him.

'Negan got you these,' he indicates to the fruit. 'Said he'd be back in a couple of hours. He's out on a run,' he mutters, heading to the door.

'How come he's got your looking after me? Shouldn't you be with him?' You call after him. Dwight stops with his hand on the door and replies in barely more than a whisper.

'Give him what he wants. It's better for you in the long run and he won't give up 'til you do.'

The door shuts behind him before you have time to process his words. His avoidance of your question disturbs you slightly.

Then your stomach groans, pulling you from your thoughts as you glance down at the bowl of fruit in front of you. Peaches and strawberries. Your mouth gapes. Staring at them as though they were incriminating, you wonder disgustedly from which group they'd been stolen.

So, ignoring your growling stomach you head to the kitchen area of the room and spot a fridge. Opening it you find it packed to the brim with vegetables, condiments and beer. Then your eyes fall onto the rest of the chilli Dwight had cooked for you last night.

You deliberate for a moment, wondering how much trouble this would get you in. But Dwight was the one who had been taking care of you — Negan clearly couldn't care less what state you're in. If Dwight had made it for you then surely he wouldn't mind if you finished it.

In any case, you can't see how Negan's punishment could be worse than he'd inflicted on you so far, and you doubt he would choose to kill you over a bowl of chilli. Not after the effort he's put into trying to break you.

You grab the chilli and spoon it out of the bowl with your hands, too hungry to bother finding a fork. As you eat, you wander over to the window and you're met with a spectacular view. A vast forest stretches back as far as the eye can see. The sun, just beginning to reach over the tree-line, sends golden shafts of light across a clear, pale blue sky. You look down to the edge of the forest and spot a tall, wire fence disappearing out of view beyond each side of the building.

Once you finish the chilli, you place it on the windowsill. The decision to beat Negan at his own game gives you a confidence you're sure you will eventually regret. But the desire to do anything possible to piss him off overwhelms your reason, even if it's just this small, insignificant act of rebellion. You ignore the fruit on the table and head towards the bed to find the clothes that had been laid out for you.

Your stomach drops as your eyes land on a pair of black lace panties and a tiny black dress with straps so thin they may as well not be there. You turn away from them and hastily start rummaging through all the drawers you can find, under the bed, in the closet... but everything is empty.

He's playing you. He must have known you would never voluntarily wear anything he wanted you to, particularly not something that would make you look so tantalisingly vulnerable. The only other option is the towel you're still wearing, offering you no more protection from his greedy gaze than if you were simply naked.

So you return to the bathroom, refusing to give into his demands. Closing the door behind you, a tiny whimper leaves your mouth when you see that there's no lock. You sit on the floor with your back against the wall and wait, thinking about how you're going to win his game.

Negan thrived on making people bend to his will, but he also delighted in watching them break as they struggled to resist him. So you would do neither; you won't react to him at all. _It's worth a try anyway_, you think to yourself.

* * *

The click of the door opening in the next room snaps you awake as you realise you'd fallen asleep. You hear the familiar sound of heavy boots striding across the floor. They stop for a moment and a soft chuckle drifts through the door. Then the boots grow louder and you stand up, tensing in preparation to resist his every move as though he were utterly beneath your notice.

The bathroom door opens to reveal Negan's towering figure. Your eyes widen in shock, immediately losing your composure. His face and jacket are covered in blood spatters which — you swallow loudly as your heart jumps into your throat and your insides grow cold — match the blood covering Lucille currently balancing on his shoulder. He smirks down at you, watching your face pale and your pupils dilate with fear.

'Who- who did you... k-kill?' You stammer breathlessly, your chest tightening as the image of Rick being beaten to death by Negan swims before your eyes.

'None o' your lot, doll, don't worry,' he chuckles light-heartedly, striding over to the sink and forcing you to back up against the wall. He places Lucille gently on the floor and turns on the tap, splashing water over his face. The sink fills instantly with blood and you feel yourself sicken.

'Now doll, if you don't mind I'm gonna take a shower. Wash this shithead's guts off o' me,' Negan growls through the water.

Standing up, he glances at you in the mirror and flashes his teeth in a devilish grin.

'You're more than welcome to join seein' as you're already dressed for it,' he smirks, eyeing your towel.

You quickly shake your head, still unable to speak from the shock of his appearance and the pain of the image of Rick's death still playing in your mind.

'Okay darlin',' Negan turns to face you. 'Either you join me and we make some sweet _bubbles _together, or you run along and put that dress on I so kindly picked out for you.'

You stare at him for a moment while he waits for your reaction. Then you turn on your heel and head straight for the next room, slamming the door behind you and throwing your towel angrily across the floor. You hear another chuckle from the bathroom followed by the sound of the shower, and you curse loudly to yourself. He had beaten you as soon as he'd entered the room and you hate him for it.

But you hate yourself more for allowing your fear to betray you. The one thought you cling to is the fact that the sight of him covered in blood and the fear of him hurting Rick did at least stay the darker side in you that lusts after him.

You cross to the bed and shove on the panties and dress without looking at them. Then you head to the couch and bite down on one of the peaches from the bowl, deciding you've already lost so you may as well get something from it before you have to fight whatever happens next. Whatever your body does to drag you down into the darkness you never knew was in you until Negan found a way to coax it out.

_'Everyone has a breaking point, darlin', and judging by the look on your pretty lil' face, I don't think it'll be long before I find yours.'_ Negan's words echo in your mind. Anger and adrenaline rises in you as your hear the shower shut off and the bathroom door open.

'I think you're finally gettin' the idea of this, darlin',' Negan drools, his eyes trailing over your dress.

You tug on it, desperately trying to cover more of your thighs as your gaze falls on his dripping wet, completely naked body.


	7. Breaking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You finally break as Negan's power overwhelms you and your craving for him begins to defeat your sanity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smutty smut smut, next chapter will be even more! NON-CON so please APPROACH WITH CAUTION.

You launch across the room and throw yourself against the door, your hands fumbling desperately at the handle. It's locked. Your resolve not to let Negan see you break disappeared the instant you saw him standing in front of you, parading the reality of what he wants you to do. 

A scream builds in your throat but a hand presses roughly over you mouth from behind you as Negan slams his body against your back, pushing you hard into the door. You watch helplessly from the corner of your eye as Negan smirks down at you mockingly, his eyes dark with lust. You can feel his erection growing against your back, his balls resting just above your ass.

'I was hopin' we'd got past this, darlin',' he murmurs in your ear, the deep vibrations of his voice rumbling through his chest against your back, eliciting a small whimper from your mouth muffled by his hand. 'But fuck girl you got some _fight _in you.' 

His grin widens as he traces his teeth with the tip of his tongue, subduing your weakening struggles with his immovable strength. His other hand reaches towards your face and you squeeze your eyes shut, terrified of what he might do. Then you're met with a soft tickling sensation along your neck. Negan gently brushes the hair from your back, exposing the sensitive skin beneath. You hear a low moan growing in his chest as he slowly leans down and brushes his lips lightly against the back of your neck, sending shivers down your spine with each kiss until you're shaking uncontrollably.

Suddenly he thrusts his hips sharply forwards, slamming yours against the door, his engorged cock jabbing hard in your back and pressing on the bruise he left you last time. The dark craving inside you awakens, ripples of heat rushing to your core. You feel yourself starting to slip away as it threatens to take over your body.

'Mm baby, you taste fuckin' good,' Negan growls against your neck, lightly tracing the tip of his tongue from the top of your spine to the dip behind your ear, leaving a tingling trail of goosebumps. He thrusts his hips forwards again with a low, breathy moan.

You dig as deep as you can for the strength to fight both him and your own betraying body, and bite hard into the hand covering your mouth. He grunts in pain, pulling away. You turn to face him before landing a punch in his diaphragm, causing him to double-over. You're just about to plant you foot in his groin when Negan's hand grabs you by the throat and you're thrown crashing onto the floor.

You try to scramble backwards but he pins your wrist down with his foot, the other pushing on your diaphragm and forcing the air out of your lungs. He stands over you mercilessly, his bulging cock fully upright and glistening with precum, his balls swollen and throbbing. Tears run down your cheeks as you let out a pathetic whimper, crumpling beneath his weight.

'I told you before doll, the more you struggle the harder it'll fuckin' be,' Negan growls down at you, his breathing heavy and a dangerous tone edging into his deep, gravelly voice.

The craving inside you purrs at the sound, and you feel your resistance fading away with every second, the heat rushing to your core fogging your mind.

'Mm what a pretty fuckin' sight you make there baby, lyin' pinned to the fuckin' floor like a dirty whore,' he drools, his voice dripping with arrogance and lust as he looms over you. 'Now I was willin' to be gentle with you, Y/N. But you're really startin' to test my patience.'

A fresh wave of fear washes over you at his words and your whole body starts to shake. Yet the heat building in your core does not subside.

'I guess I'll just have to teach you your fuckin' place,' he growls, slowly descending over you. 

He releases you momentarily before placing his knees on your shoulders, only partly supporting his weight on his feet so that your joints groan under his pressure and your arms grow steadily numb. He rests his balls on your cleavage and the tip of his cock bounces gently on your chin, dripping his precum just below your lips.

'Lick it up,' he orders, the power behind his voice making you whimper involuntarily as another wave rushes to your core. Your eyes lock with his and he smirks, seeing the terror in them. 'Come on, Y/N. I know there's a part of you that's beggin' for a fuckin' taste,' he growls.

He's found your breaking point. It's only a matter of time before the dark side of you that craves his dominance takes over your sanity. He traces his tongue slowly across his lips, watching you crumble beneath him. You take a deep breath and shut your eyes, tears swimming behind your eyelids as you slowly lower your tongue to your chin and flick it once across the tip of Negan's cock. The salty taste assaults the tip of your tongue and he orders you to return it to your mouth. You do as he says. The liquid falls to the back of your throat and hits your gag reflex so you have no choice but to swallow it before you choke. It takes everything in you to hold back the sobs now rocking your body as he groans softly.

'Good fuckin' girl.' You feel yourself sliding away, a mixture of shame, fear, and unmistakable longing washing over you.

Suddenly the weight pushing you to the floor disappears. You open your eyes to see Negan standing above you, offering you his hand. It takes a few moments for your brain to catch up, sure that it couldn't already be over.

'Don't leave me hangin', baby,' he smirks at you, his playful tone back in place as though nothing had happened.

He chuckles softly at your confusion. You ignore his hand as you push yourself clumsily to your feet, stumbling slightly on your shaking legs. He raises his eyebrow, letting his hand drop.

'Still fightin' huh? But I think you know who's really fuckin' winnin', don't you Y/N?' He flashes his teeth in his signature shit-eating grin and then steps forwards, closing the distance between you and taking your chin with his hand, pulling it up so that his lips brush lightly against yours as he says in a low moan, 'How do I taste?'

His eyes bore into yours and the fight leaves your body, exhaustion overwhelming you. You close your eyes as you mumble mechanically, 'So good.'

He holds you there for a moment before you feel him release you, the heat of his body disappearing and leaving goosebumps over your exposed skin as you grow suddenly cold. You keep your eyes closed. He growls somewhere in the distance.

'I think you're ready for your lesson now, darlin'.'


	8. Craving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan teaches you your place as your resistance breaks, but there's a flicker of hope when he tells you you're going to see Rick.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More shameless smut but still a lot LOT more to come - elements of non-con so PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Hope you enjoy reading! I'll post the next chapter ASAP.

You're rooted to the spot, your body suddenly wracked with sobs. You try to swallow them but they spill out of you uncontrollably, tears rolling down your cheeks. For the first time in a long time, you feel utterly powerless.

'Aw don't fuckin' _cry_, Y/N. I thought you were a fighter!' Negan cries mockingly, his voice growing closer to you.

You shake your head and put your face in your hands, trying desperately to stem the flow of tears. Suddenly Negan's heat wraps around you and you're enveloped by his intoxicating smell as he pulls you into his chest, tucking your head under his chin.

'Come on now, darlin', pull yourself together for fuck's sake,' he growls softly, the deep vibrations from his chest rumbling against your ear.

You're taken off guard by his suddenly gentle demeanour and you push away from him, stepping back several feet with your arms held defensively in front of you. Negan's face is unreadable as he crosses the room to the bathroom, disappearing for a moment. Your sobs begin to subside while you nervously wait. His sudden change disturbs you more than the violence of his attack, raising the hair on the back of your neck as you wonder what sadistic game he's playing.

Negan returns a minute later tucking himself into his jeans. Your eyes travel up his toned torso, tracing over the tattoos on his chest and arms before meeting his gaze. He watches you for a moment, leaning lazily against the doorframe. He hooks his thumbs through his belt-loops, his head tilted back slightly as he surveys you with an unusually serious expression on his face.

You tug anxiously on the hem of your dress, feeling as though he's sizing you up. You suddenly feel embarrassed about your outburst, as though you'd let him down by being weak. You push the thought hastily from your mind, confused by the zig-zagging of your emotions. But you can't suppress the tingling sensations now spreading across your skin as you watch his eyes travelling up and down your body before lingering on the scar on your thigh left by the bullet wound.

'How'd you get that?' He asks quietly. 

You're still tense in expectation, waiting for the next wave of his attack. Clearing your throat, you try to find some volume in an effort to cover your breakdown.

'I told you in Alexandria: I got shot.'

A mischievous grin flashes momentarily across Negan's face before he recomposes it, tearing his eyes away from your thigh and staring at you with an intensity that makes your breath catch in your throat.

'How'd you like to pay ol' Prick a visit tomorrow, honey?' He growls slowly, taking a step towards you. 

Your heart pounds, thumping audibly against your ribcage as you search his face disbelievingly.

'I... I can... go home?' You mutter quietly, terrified that it might be some kind of test that you just failed by asking him that question again. 

He takes another slow step towards you, never breaking his gaze, keeping your eyes locked on his.

'What's the magic word?' He whispers, the edge of a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips as he traces his tongue across his lower lip, taking another step. 

You don't break eye contact this time, replying in a quiet but firm voice.

'Please... sir?' You add for extra measure.

Something flashes across his eyes. He bites his lip, taking a final step towards you, now only inches away. You can feel his body heat and his aroma descending over you like a cloud, muddling your brain and sending a shiver through your body. The dark lust inside you purrs expectantly; your fight is evaporating fast with every inhalation of his intoxicating scent.

'Sir...' he muses, reaching to stroke a finger across your cheek. Your skin burns beneath his touch. 'I like that.'

You feel yourself succumbing to the ripples flooding to your core as his finger trails down to your collarbone, tracing along it before sliding gently over your shoulder and down your back. He grabs your waist firmly and pulls your hips into his body, still holding your gaze, your breathing getting faster as he leans his face around to your ear.

'You're gonna call me sir from now on. You got that, darlin'?' He growls in a low voice, his hot breath tickling your neck, making you shudder against his body.

He chuckles, dipping his other hand to the hem of your dress and tracing along the scar on your thigh. You gasp as a flood of heat rushes between your legs in reaction to his touch.

'Yes... sir,' you breathe before you're aware of what you're saying. 

Something is shouting at you from the back of your mind, but it's muffled by the sensations flooding your body with increasing intensity.

'Good girl,' he moans softly, catching your earlobe roughly between his teeth. His grip on your waist tightens, his fingers travelling slowly up the inside of your thigh.

Your breathing is so rapid that you start to feel light-headed. You're forced to close your eyes when the room begins to spin around you.

'I knew you couldn't resist me, baby... don't fight it,' he moans seductively, his lips brushing along your jawline to your mouth. 

You stand there helplessly as he traces the tip of his tongue lightly over your parted lips, igniting a fire in your body.

'No...' you moan, squeezing your eyes shut, the shouting at the back of your head fighting against the sensations running through your body.

Negan ignores you, biting your lower lip with his teeth and sucking on it hungrily, causing the fire to rage suddenly hotter inside you, pushing back your resistance. Negan's fingers reach your groin and trace tantalisingly slowly to your entrance, moving up and gently parting your folds before slipping between them.

'Mm, you're so fuckin' wet for me, baby,' he groans against your lips, his hand tightening painfully on your waist. He runs his fingers slowly up and down your folds, spreading your juices through your pussy.

'No!' You cry, tearing yourself away from him.

You collide with the arm of the couch and your knees buckle beneath you, knocking you off balance. Negan's vice-like grip is back on your waist as he pushes your back onto the couch, your legs flailing over the edge of it. Gripping your hips with bruising force, Negan pushes his torso between your legs, spreading them apart. You sit up, trying to tug his hands off of you but he slams his palm into your chest, winding you as you fall back down onto your back.

'Don't try 'n tell me you're not _achin' _for this, Y/N. Cos' your soakin' pussy tells a very different fuckin' story to your mouth. So why don't you just shut the fuck up for once and _take it_,' he growls, anger seeping through his heavy breaths.

He locks his eyes onto yours as he removes one hand from your hip and flips up your dress, revealing your panties. The gentle lightness gone from his touch, Negan hooks his fingers beneath the lace and rips it off in one swift motion so that you're on full display. His eyes flick down to your throbbing core and he licks his lips slowly.

'That's a pretty fuckin' pussy you got there, honey,' he growls, locking his gaze back onto your terrified eyes.

He traces one finger slowly between your folds, biting his lip as he watches your eyes widen and your skin flush, betraying the lust inside of you. You whimper half-heartedly for him to stop. He ignores you.

'And look how fuckin' _wet _you are,' he moans, bringing his finger up to your mouth and forcing it between your lips, ordering you to suck it clean.

As you taste yourself on his finger your resistance crumbles completely. Half of you watches in horror while the other half succumbs to the waves of desperate longing raging through your body. Almost as though he's read your mind, Negan pulls his finger from your mouth with a faint 'pop' and plunges it hard into your entrance, ramming it as deep as he can. You mewl as your walls convulse, closing tightly around the invasion.

'Oh baby, you are _tight_,' he growls, pulling his finger out almost all the way before thrusting it back inside you even harder, a guttural groan escaping his lips.

Your eyes roll back as he begins to thrust his long digit at a punishingly slow pace, slamming his knuckles painfully into your pelvis, driving deeper and deeper into you. Mewling and whimpering helplessly, your hands grips the fabric of the couch as your back arches into his attack. His breathing gets heavier as he begins to pick up the pace, slipping in a second finger.

Sliding his free hand underneath you, he lifts you ass up, angling it so his fingers curl around to hit your g-spot with each thrust. You let out a strangled cry, the fire inside of you suddenly intensifying ten-fold and spasms of pleasure ripple through your walls. Then Negan's fingers disappear, leaving you empty. Your walls convulse desperately around nothing.

'Did I say you could fuckin' cum?' Negan growls menacingly, his mouth now at your ear as he bears down over you, his hand soaking with your juices curling tightly around your throat. You gasp for air and your head starts to swim, pain building in your lungs.

'Did I say you could fuckin' cum?!' Negan roars, his thumb pushing up under your chin, forcing your head back to look at him.

'I'm sorry! I'm sorry, please...' you choke, tears now streaming down your cheeks as your hips buck involuntarily up into Negan's body, your walls still spasming desperately for release as you're left empty.

'You're a fuckin' naughty little slut, aren't you Y/N?' Negan sneers.

Your eyes roll back into your head, the fog descending over your oxygen-starved brain. Just as you're about to pass out, Negan lets go of your throat. You gasp, clutching your bruised neck. He grabs a fistful of hair at the back of your head, pulling roughly and making you yelp in pain. He brings his lips to your ear and traces the tip of his tongue lightly over the ridges, sending another wave of shivers down your spine.

'Do you know what happens to naughty little sluts like you?' He coos softly, grazing you earlobe delicately with his teeth while he tugs on your hair. You feel a couple of strands come loose.

'No... sir,' you whimper, the pain in your scalp breeding fresh tears in your eyes.

'They get punished,' he growls.

Before you have time to register his words, Negan pulls you up by your hair, dragging you off of the couch. Then he lets go of you and sits down in your place, smirking at your quivering form as your legs barely keep you upright. He snaps his fingers, pointing to his lap. You stare at him in disbelief.

'Get the fuck over here,' he orders sharply, snapping his fingers again.

You shuffle forwards towards him, the aching desperation in your core outweighing your fear of the salacious grin forming on his face as he relishes in your trepidation. You stand in front of him, still unsure what he wants you to do, a hundred scenarios racing through your mind. Then he grabs your legs with one hand and your shoulders with the other, pulling you roughly onto his lap. One hand pushes your head into the couch and the other hooks beneath your belly, raising your ass into the air. He flips your dress over your back.

'Every time I spank your pretty lil' ass you're gonna shout my name. You got that, honey? I want you to scream it for the whole fuckin' buildin' to hear,' Negan growls, seizing at your flesh and squeezing it until his fingernails dig sharply into your skin.

'You got that?' He shouts, grabbing a fistful of your hair again and pulling your head back to hear your wail.

'Yes, sir!'

'Good girl. Good fuckin' girl,' he grunts as the first strike stings your skin.

'Negan!' You croak, your body starting to wrack with sobs, your face burning in humiliation.

'Louder, doll. I can't fuckin' hear you,' he growls through gritted teeth, his breathing heavy. You can feel the bulge at his crotch growing against your belly as he strikes you again.

'Negan!' You cry, as loudly as you can through your sobs. 

He tugs on your hair again, wrapping his fingers tighter against your scalp and you yelp in pain. He strikes you another three times.

'Negan! Negan! Negan!'

Your skin is raw and your scalp burns, your body shaking uncontrollably as the fire in your core dissolves in your humiliation. Negan releases your hair and traces a finger gently over you stinging skin.

'I've left you a good fuckin' handprint there, baby. You should _see _it! _Wow!_' He mocks playfully before flipping your dress back down and pulling you gently up off of his lap so you're sitting beside him. He wraps an arm around your shoulder as you cry in earnest, tears splashing against his hot skin.

'Have you learned your lesson, Y/N?' He mumbles softly, the vibrations in his chest oddly comforting. You're once more thrown off guard by his sudden gentleness.

Gulping down your sobs, you croak out a tiny 'yes, sir'.

'Good girl,' he growls gently before removing his arm from around you and pushing you off of his body. You look up at him, confused. But he walks away from you and heads for the door.

'Where are you going?' You mumble, resenting the coldness that suddenly engulfs you in the place of his heat. He turns to face you just as he reaches the door, a smug grin etching over his face as he admires his work.

'Aw, don't you worry doll. I'll be back soon. I've gotta get one o' my wives to take care of this,' he drools, grabbing the bulging erection beneath his pants and throwing his hips forwards with a wink.

He lingers for a moment, one hand on the door, watching the anger and humiliation rise in your face. 

As he opens the door and steps out of the rooms he adds, 'You may wanna clean yourself up before we head over to see your Rick, tomorrow.' 

Then with a devilish grin, he locks the door behind him.


	9. Parade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just as promised Negan brings you back to Rick, but there's a catch. You begin to suspect that Rick has feelings for you as Negan makes his threat, but for now all you want is to be with him and forget about the week's events. But will you be able to forget the darker part of you that craves Negan's touch?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Setting up for the wealth of smut that'll be the next chapter - enjoy!

Something stirs you from your semi-conscious stupor. You hadn't been able to sleep all night. As soon as Negan had left, you'd scrubbed yourself raw in the shower and cried until you fell into a sleepless daze on the bathroom floor again. Your body aches from your miserable make-shift bed consisting of your towel curled up as a pillow against the wall. Negan had left his towel in there too, perhaps deliberately. But you hadn't wanted to risk bringing the memories of last night rushing back just by inhaling his lingering scent.

The longing in your core still ached in the background after Negan's teasing assault, leaving you empty just as you had begun to climax before punishing it away from you so you could find no satisfaction in release. He knew exactly what he was doing. He had sensed your body's weakness for him and he was going to manipulate it out of you until you forgot your hatred and your principles and fell to your knees, begging.

A gentle knock at the door brings you to your senses. You sit bolt upright.

'Y/N, it's me... open up,' comes a quiet voice.

You scramble up to your feet, tugging the black dress you were still wearing down as far as it would go before inching open the door to reveal Dwight. His eyes meet yours and for a second you think you see a hint of pity in them before he drops his gaze to the bowl of chilli he holds in front of him.

'I made you some more,' he says softly. You stare at him for a moment, confused. He glances up at you again, a slight crease forming between his eyes. 'You like it, right?'

'Yeah... yeah I do. Thanks,' you reply, shaking your head a little to clear it. 'How'd you know that?' 

His brow furrows as he suddenly looks you straight in the eyes.

'You finished the last lot - I found the bowl on the windowsill... I just assumed...' his voice grows quieter and a slight blush creeps up his cheeks as he looks down again.

He hands you the bowl and you mumble a thanks. He nods once, turning to leave before calling gently over his shoulder.

'Negan laid some clothes out for you. He'll be back in a few minutes.' 

And he's gone, leaving you to ponder confusedly over his unusual demeanour. You wonder whether he's under some instruction from Negan to give you the impression that you might actually have a friend here after all. A safety blanket to follow the attacks, pulling you into some sort of twisted sense of security.

You scoop the bowl clean before bringing yourself to look at the clothes laid out for you on the bed. A pair of tiny red lace panties and a deep red, backless body-con dress that wouldn't reach much below your ass. Your stomach squirms uncomfortably, your face burning with shame at the thought of Alexandria seeing you in this. Of _Rick _seeing you in this, knowing that it's all for Negan to parade how he turned you into his slut whom he had to punish for cumming before he'd granted you permission. 

You shove them on unceremoniously, tugging anxiously at the thin fabric as you head to the bathroom to put a comb through your knotted hair. It takes a few minutes to untangle the mess Negan left at the back of your head.

You gasp in horror when you finally focus on your reflection in the mirror. A light bruise in the shape of Negan's fingers blossoms over your neck. You turn around and whimper at the sight of the fingernail marks and bruise on your back not covered by the pitiful amount of material on your body. For the first time since the world turned, you find yourself wishing for some make-up to hide Negan's marks. 

Sighing in mild relief that at least no one will see the still stinging handprint on your ass, you put on your best impression of total indifference when you hear the door click open in the next room.

Striding as confidently as you can from the bathroom, you stare at the door Negan now walks through. His leather jacket is mercifully clean of blood, and opens to a plain white t-shirt that hugs tightly over his muscles. Swinging Lucille loosely by his side he saunters slowly over to you, taking his time to explore every inch of your body as the familiar cocky smirk spreads over his face.

'Well Y/N, don't you brush up fine,' he growls seductively, coming to stand just inches away from you.

You continue to stare over his shoulder at the door as you reply mechanically, 'Thank you, sir.'

Through your peripheral you see a flash of something cross Negan's face, the cocky grin faltering for a second. It takes every effort to resist looking up at him in curiosity, hoping that your play might just be working. After a few moments of silence, he takes a step back and turns towards the door.

'You ready to go back?' He growls, his voice suddenly expressionless. Your heart leaps, failing to keep the excitement out of your voice.

'You're taking me home?'

You hadn't dared to think about it when Negan had mentioned it yesterday after he'd left you stinging and empty. You'd pushed it straight from your mind, assuming it had just been some play to get your hopes up before crushing you again.

'Of course, doll. I fuckin' told you that yesterday,' he replies, the faint hint of amusement seeping through his uncharacteristically monotonous tone. 

He opens the door and looks back at you, eyebrows raised expectantly while the rest of his face remains disturbingly expressionless. You wonder if he's trying to imitate your robotic demeanour in order to undermine your play.

'Yes, sir,' you intone mechanically, walking straight past him out of the door.

* * *

The ride to Alexandria passes painfully slowly. You sit between Negan and Dwight in the front of Negan's truck, all three of you staring determinedly out of the window in silence. You try to glean something from each of their expressions out of the corner of your eye, but Negan's face is blank and his body relaxed, as though you're not even there. Dwight's eyes are unfocused and his face looks paler than usual, his scars standing out sharply against his skin. You flick your eyes down to his lap where he grips Lucille between his legs and you see that his knuckles are white with strain. The walls of Alexandria finally come into view and you spot a couple of walkers turn towards the noise of Negan's truck and the other three following behind.

'Giver her here, Dwight,' Negan's deep growl makes you jump after the prolonged quiet.

Dwight passes Lucille over you to Negan. You can feel Negan's eyes on you, but you keep your stare fixed on the snarling walkers now dragging themselves towards you.

'Get out of the truck,' he orders you, the commanding edge in his voice sending a small rush of warmth between your legs. You pray he doesn't notice the flush in your cheeks.

Obeying in silence, you slide out after him, following as far back as you dare with Dwight just behind you. He meets your eyes momentarily when you glance back at him. The hint of pity and sadness in them makes your stomach churn nervously as you return your gaze to Negan's back.

He swings his bat with astonishing force, colliding with each walker's skull and sending blood-curling cracks through the air just as the gate grates open. Your chest constricts and your breath quickens, seeing Rick standing on the other side, one hand resting on the hatchet at his hip. He hadn't spotted you yet, for you stand in Negan's shadow, Dwight now stepping forwards in front of you to his side. You wonder if this was all planned so that you would be revealed at the right moment in your short, tight red dress, sporting the marks of Negan's lust and punishment.

'Well if it isn't my favourite dick!' Negan chants playfully, thrusting his hips forwards as he floors the last walker with an expert swing. 'Actually that's a lie, my dick is _so _much bigger than yours... just ask your lil' friend here!'

He steps aside with his arm out and beckons you forwards with a lazy flick of his finger. You can't take your eyes off of Rick as you shuffle nervously towards Negan, your shoulders hunched forward and your arms crossed tightly across your chest. When Rick's eyes fall on you, you meet his gaze and try to tell him wordlessly how sorry you are. How you'd tried. How Negan might have begun to break you, but he hadn't yet destroyed you. You weren't Negan's, you were his. Your heart pounds against your ribcage as though it's trying desperately to pull you towards him. But you come to a stop beside Negan, knowing it can't be that simple.

Looking to Negan, your stomach drops at the mischievous grin forming on his face as he senses your desperation to return to Rick. He eyes you up and down for a moment, tracing the tip of his tongue along his lower lip and rubbing a thumb along his jaw. His gaze runs pointedly over your curves, lingering on the bruises on your neck, something dark flashing across his face and turning your insides cold.

This wasn't the end for you. Whatever his reason for sending you back to Rick, it was all part of his plan to break you. Grim reality settles over you, quelling the excitement you'd felt at seeing Rick with a wave of crushing hopelessness. You're barely surprised by the next words that are out of Negan's mouth, realising that you'd been expecting them all along.

'Y/N here was just _desperate _to see you, Pricky Boy. Fuck knows why she wants to go back to you after she got a look at _my_ dick,' he coos playfully.

You keep your eyes to the ground as the air becomes alive with murmurs and whispers. The whole of Alexandria now thinks you've slept with both Rick _and _Negan, despite neither one being true. No one in their right mind would believe that Rick would ever fancy you. As for Negan, you pray that they see the bruises not as the result of your lust, but of Negan's force.

'But...' Negan continues, pausing for dramatic effect as he points Lucille directly at Rick's face. You hold your breath, preparing for the catch you were anticipating. 'I want her back first thing tomorrow morning. And Rick, if she ain't spick 'n fuckin' spanfor me, I'll slit her pretty lil' throat and make you watch.'

He turns then to you, pressing his body close against yours and pulling your face up to look at him with a rough hand gripping your chin.

'I want you to remember...' he growls in a voice low enough for only you and Dwight to hear. '...what it felt like to have my fingers thrusting deeper and deeperinside you 'til you came. How it felt to be left empty and desperate as I spanked your ass fuckin' _raw _for cumin' without my permission. The next time I see you darlin', I want you fuckin' beggin' me to fill you with my dick. You got that?'

You swallow to hold back the sobs building in your chest. Looking him in the eyes, you answer mechanically, 'Yes, sir.'

'Good girl,' he grunts, tracing his tongue along his lower lip and holding your gaze for a moment before releasing you and turning back to his truck. 'And Y/N, if I hear of any fuckin' hanky-panky between you and Rick, I'll slit _his _throat and make _you _watch. Dwight will be stickin' to you like a fuckin' limpet, and if he doesn't tell me tomorrow how you fingered yourself to sleep moaning my fuckin' name to the walls, I'll give you something to scream your pretty mouth around tomorrow.'

He chuckles satisfyingly at the indignant look on your face as he steps into the truck and signals his entourage to leave. Why does he think anything would happen between you at Rick? You turn to Dwight, ready to punch his face in. You don't know why he would make such a thing up, but seeing as its him Negan had left to babysit you, you're positive it came from him. That must be why he couldn't look you in the eye. Why he always looked at you with such pity as he tried to make it up to you with menial gestures — guilt.

But before you can so much as raise your fist, Rick is beside you and Dwight is walking away, not looking at either of you. You're uncomfortably aware of your onlookers and what must be running through their heads as they stare at you. But the combination of pain and joy on Rick's face blurs your surroundings into insignificance and you leap straight into his arms without thinking.

He wraps his arms tightly around you until you can barely breathe. Unlike Negan's touch, his affection is palpable and you feel an odd twinge in your heart as Rick begins to shake with sobs, clinging to you as though he never wants to let go. You had no idea you meant anything to him; he'd never so much as shaken your hand before.

The pieces start to come together in your head. Whatever it was that Rick had said to Negan before you were stolen away must be the reason why Negan thought that something might happen, or had already happened between you. Which is why he'd assigned Dwight to keep an eye on you. What didn't make sense was why then would Negan send you back to Rick at all? It was undoubtedly some kind of test, but why risk it in the first place? 

You assumed Negan would be the jealous type, even if meant absolutely nothing to him — you were just someone who stood up to him and needed to be shown their place. For some reason you feel a twinge of annoyance at the idea that you're nothing more than a project to him... But you banish it from your mind as Rick pulls away, tears sparkling in his bright blue eyes.

'Are you okay?' He says hoarsely, taking your face gently between his palms and staring deeply into your eyes, searching them desperately.

You give him a small smile, the exhaustion of the last week's events crashing down on you like a tidal wave. Suddenly it's too difficult to even stand and your legs start to give way beneath you. Rick catches you with strong arms but his grip is soft as he lifts you up and cradles you against his chest. The gentle rocking of his walk and the sound of his heart against your ear are the last things you remember before darkness takes you and you fall unconscious.


	10. Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan allows you to stay the night in Alexandria, promising to pick you up tomorrow with a threat that makes your blood run cold. But something happens between you and Rick and he promises to find a way to get you out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while since my last post - I've been away! Back now and I'm hoping to get as many chapters up as I can this week. Here's some different smut and a bit of plot development - don't worry, the Negan smut is far from over ;) Thanks for the lovely feedback, it means a lot! Hope you enjoy!

You awaken to find yourself in a warm bed. After the suffering you'd endured over the last two weeks, the comfort is just as welcome as when Rick first brought you here, wounded and alone. Muffled voices come from somewhere in the distance. Keeping your eyes closed and your body still, you listen as hard as you can.

'She's been through hell, Rick. Anyone can see that,' drifts an unfamiliar voice.

'But what if he... you know... what if he did _that_ to her? How can she come back from that?' Your heart skips a beat, recognising Rick.

'You don't know that he did. You have to just ask her,' says the other man.

'She's not gonna want to talk to me. She barely just got here and I let him take her... I'd made sure none of her shifts coincided with when Negan was due to show up, but he always comes early. I should never have let her do guard duty,' the audible stress in Rick's tone makes your heart twinge again.

'From what I saw out there, she trusts you. When she first saw you she looked like she'd been reunited with her dead mother. She feels something for you Rick. You have to trust her, give her the chance to tell you the truth.'

Your heart leaps into your throat — what is he saying? Rick can't think that you have feelings for him. You're not even sure yourself what you feel for Rick, other than sheer joy to see him alive, to be alive yourself so that you could return to him.

'Come on Jesus, why would she feel _anything_ for me? I stuck a fuckin' gun to her head the moment she came outta that coma, and I've barely spoke to her since,' Rick says in a low, tense voice tinged with bitterness.

'You've been telling me all sorts of stuff about her, _and _you said how great she was in training, how she didn't even need teaching. Where did all that come from if you've not talked to her before?' The man named Jesus says sarcastically.

'She was friendly with Carol,' Rick's voice trails off. 'What?' He asks defensively, as though Jesus had given him a look.

'So you admit you have a thing for her?' Jesus says with an audible grin. Rick doesn't answer. 'You had to let her contribute in some way Rick. From what I've heard, she's a damn good fighter and she's not the sort to just sit around planting vegetables all day. She wanted to protect this place after you gave her a home here,' Jesus says firmly.

You picture Rick squeezing his eyes shut and shaking his head at his words.

'It's my fault though. If she hadn't been out on duty that day she may never have met him. I could have kept her hidden. I...' says Rick, his voice rising in anger, then cracking a little as he says suddenly quietly, 'I should have kept her safe.'

The same constricting sensation you'd felt at the sight of Rick at the gate spreads across your chest once more. You can't stand to hear him beating himself up over Negan's acts of atrocity. Swinging your legs off of the bed and ignoring the wave of nausea brought on by your sudden movement, you wrench the door open to find them standing at the end of the upstairs corridor in the house Rick had given after your recovery.

'It's not your fault Rick,' you say quietly. 'It's Negan's. It's all him. It's only every been him.'

The man you presume to be Jesus — his long hair and beard, and piercing blue eyes give you the impression that it must be a nickname — gives you a small, approving smile before patting Rick once on the back and retreating downstairs, leaving you and Rick to stare at one another in the corridor.

The gap between you seems to go on for miles and you're surprised by the suddenly overwhelming urge to run straight into his arms. To convince him that you don't blame him for anything. But you stay rooted to the spot as Rick slowly approaches you, the pain and concern etched all over his face. His eyes find the bruises on your neck. You only now realise that you're still wearing Negan's red dress. He stops in front of you, unable to tear his gaze away from Negan's marks, his eyes wide.

'Did he do that to you?' He asks in barely more than a whisper.

There's an edge to his voice you'd never heard before and it scares you slightly. You reply with a tiny nod, watching intently for his reaction, afraid that he might run off to find Negan right now and have his head caved in by Lucille before he could bury his hatchet in between Negan's eyes. Rick's face hardens and a muscle in his jaw twitches as he looks down at the floor, breathing heavily.

'I'm so sorry, Y/N,' he intones in a low voice. The tangible anger and hurt makes you feel sick.

You close the gap between you and instinctively reach for him, placing a hand gingerly over his gripping tightly onto the hatchet at his hip. His fingers relax at your touch and he looks up at you, your sudden proximity causing your racing heart to thump even louder in your chest. Your breath catches in your throat as Rick's eyes travel down to your lips and his face moves infinitesimally closer to yours.

Before you register what's happening, you're crushing your lips onto his. His hands brush lightly up your arms before cradling your face, his rough skin still soft and gentle while his lips suck on yours with a hunger that ripples through your body. When Rick breaks away, you open your eyes to find his glistening with tears. He runs a finger lightly over the bruises on your neck.

'Rick, I'm okay. He didn't... we never had sex, he just...' you stop at the terrifying look on Rick's face. His eyes hold yours with heart-stopping intensity as a hate-filled sneer curls his lips.

'I'm gonna kill him, Y/N. I'll do it tomorrow. I'm never gonna let him take you away from me again,' he says with a growl that reminds you disturbingly of Negan.

'No Rick, he'll kill you,' you cry desperately, gripping Rick's face in your hands.

His eyes soften at your touch and suddenly his fight is replaced by a deep anguish and resignation that tugs painfully at your heart.

'I can't lose you, Y/N,' he whispers, his blue eyes swimming with tears.

'You won't, I promise. You have to let me go back to him or he _will _kill you. But I'll always be yours.'

Suddenly Rick has you in a vice-grip, one hand running through your hair while the other grabs you by the waist and pulls you into his body. Your arms immediately curl around his neck, your fingers entwining in his hair as he crushes his lips over yours, kissing you with an intensity that sucks the air from your lungs and soon has you gasping for breath. His mouth travels down your neck, kissing with an exquisite gentleness along your bruises, eradicating the remnants of Negan's touch from your skin with light brushes of Rick's tongue. You can't stifle the whimper that leaves your lips when he pulls away. Taking your hands in his, his eyes lock with yours.

'Do you want this, Y/N?' He says quietly.

'Yes,' you whisper breathlessly, unable to remember any words other than the one that had been burning through your brain from the moment Rick had kissed you. You had no idea where this all came from, but it felt inexplicably right, as though you'd been subconsciously wanting him for weeks.

He considers you for a moment, his gaze boring into you. Then he pushes you backwards until your back hits the wall, his lips finding your neck. You gasp as his teeth and tongue and lips trace hungrily over your skin, leaving behind tingling trails of warmth that spread to your core. He runs his hands over your ass, a deep, gentle groan rumbling in his chest. Working his way back up to your lips, he slides his tongue gently between them, tasting every inch of your mouth he moaning softly into it.

Removing his hands momentarily from your body, Rick shrugs off his jacket and pushes his body into yours, pinning you to the wall. You feel his growing bulge pressing into your abdomen, his breathing getting heavier and more ragged as waves of heat rush through your body. He tugs gently on your hair and grazes your earlobe with his teeth, his tongue flicking across the flesh of your ear and sending shivers down your spine.

When you mutter his name through you rapid breaths, Rick's body pushes harder against yours. He trails his hands up your sides, squeezing your breasts with a strength and desperation crescendoing the throb in your core until you're involuntarily bucking your hips into his. One of his hands stays massaging your breast while the other moves to the hem of your dress, tracing lightly and excruciatingly slowly up your thigh.

He lets out a low growl against your lips as he palms your core. The heat and tension rushing through you start to make your head swim and you clutch desperately at Rick's face with both hands, pulling him into a deep kiss that spreads a different kind of warmth through your chest as his fingers slip gently between your folds. You feel his mouth tugging away from yours, trying to break the kiss, but you bite down on his lower lip, desperate never to let him go. He lets out a soft chuckle as he puts one hand on you jaw, gently pushing you away while the fingers of his other hand hover delicately over your entrance.

'Are you sure? I only want this if you want it too,' Rick breathes, searching your eyes.

'I really want this Rick. I want _you_,' you sigh, frozen to the spot, Rick's fingers teasingly circling your entrance.

He flashes a row of perfect white teeth in a smile that crinkles his eyes. The warmth grows in your chest. Before you have a chance to catch your breath, his lips are on yours and his finger plunges deep inside you, eliciting an aching moan from you both as he curls around and brushes right against your G-spot.

You buck your hips against his hand, willing him to keep going as your hands fly to his crotch, one undoing his belt while the other palms his bulge. Feeling his size beneath his pants, your core aches. You tug roughly on his pants, desperate to feel him inside you.

Then suddenly you're left empty as Rick removes his finger from your dripping pussy and places both his hands under your ass. Without breaking away from your lips, he lifts you into the air and wraps your legs around his waist, carrying you into your bedroom. His erection rubs against the lace at your entrance and your juices soak through his pants. You can't wait any longer. As soon as he drops you onto the bed, you yank his pants down, gasping as his erection springs free in front of your face.

Without a second thought, you shift off of the bed and onto your knees, Rick standing over you. Locking your eyes onto his, you flick the tip of your tongue over the head of his cock. Listening in ecstasy to Rick's quickening breaths and low moans, you tease the length of his cock with your tongue, running right to the base before hungrily licking his full balls. After a few moments, he slides one hand through your hair while the other grips your chin, pulling your face firmly but gently back up to the tip of his cock. 

Understanding what he wants, you don't hesitate to grant his wish, wrapping your lips around his head and taking as much of his length as you can until the taste of his precum hits the back of your throat. Rick throws his head back with a deep moan and grabs both of your hands in a vice-grip as you begin to slide him in and out of your mouth, your tongue constantly exploring every inch of him. You feel him getting even harder in your mouth and suddenly your core aches to be filled by him. Releasing him with a small 'pop', you meet his eyes. Your heart leaps at the lust in his, looking down at you with a hunger that makes your walls tremble inside you.

Grabbing you by the shoulders, Rick pulls you up and pushes you down onto the bed, a new force in his desperation that only makes you more impatient for him. You pull him onto you and he slides himself between your legs, sucking and biting between your cleavage. His hands travel down to your thighs and flip your dress up over your hips, exposing the red lace panties Negan had picked out for you, now soaked through with your juices. 

Your stomach drops and suddenly all the warmth is disappearing from your body. Rick stops in his tracks, gaping at them with a horrible expression of hatred and hurt. You bury your face in your hands and tears start to burn in your eyes.

'Did he... did he make you wear these too... f-for _him_?' Rick hisses through gritted teeth.

'I didn't have a choice Rick. I'm s-so sorry, please...' you sob through your hands, the tears now flowing freely down your cheeks.

After a few moments of silence you know Rick must despise you. You wait for him to leave in disgust, knowing you'll never see him again. You'll be collected by Negan and you'll spend the rest of your life at the Sanctuary. You'd rather starve in that cell than succumb to Negan's desires, but you know that he will find a way to make you his eventually. Whatever it takes.

But Rick doesn't leave you. A warm hand gently prises yours from your face. You gulp down your sobs as you look up at him, his face inches from yours and etched with sadness. But also with an understanding kindness.

'It's okay Y/N. It's not your fault,' he whispers softly, stroking away your tears with his thumb as he cups your face.

'I'm so sorry,' you whisper.

'You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm going to get you out, I promise. We'll find a way,' he mumbles in a low voice before pressing his lips tenderly to yours.

Warmth spreads through your chest and your heart constricts in a mixture of pain and longing. His kiss grows deeper. You pull him into you, wrapping your fingers in his hair. His arms curl around your back, tugging your hips into his. You can feel his bare cock rubbing teasingly against the lace of your panties and the heat you felt before begins to build again.

One of his hands runs over the curve of your ass, the other travelling down your sides to your thighs, tracing small circles with a light finger that sends shivers running down your spine. Slowly Rick moves up to your waist, hooking the lace between his fingers and tugging the panties down your legs. You kick them off, exposing your bare pussy to his wandering hands which now grab your thighs and push them apart, spreading your legs and your entrance.

Suddenly you're gasping for air, your back arching against the bed, waves of pleasure rolling over you with dizzying intensity as Rick sucks on your clit. He delves a finger into your entrance, pumping it back and forth until your walls begin to convulse and the sensations in your clit become almost unbearable. Then he removes his finger and his beard tickles your folds as he dips his tongue into you, lapping hungrily at your juices and sending the vibrations of his deep moans through to your core. You grip the sheets, his name leaving your lips without your notice as your walls begin to convulse around his tongue in an ecstatic climax.

Before you have a chance to catch your breath, Rick's mouth is on yours, his tongue pushing past your lips so you can taste yourself on him. Your climax is barely over before the tension begins to build once more. Rick teasingly prods your entrance with the tip of his dripping cock. He pulls back just for a moment to search your eyes questioningly. You nod, holding your breath, desperately waiting for him to enter you.

He holds your gaze as he plunges his cock slowly, inch by inch, into your pussy. You feel your walls stretching to accommodate his girth, your eyes rolling back and your mouth gaping open as he fills you completely. He stays there for a moment, brushing his lips tenderly along your jaw line, one hand losing itself in your hair and the other gently gripping your hip. Then he begins to pull out, tantalisingly slowly, making sure you feel every single inch of him rubbing against your walls. He pulls out all the way to the tip before plunging back inside you, knocking the air from your lungs and eliciting a loud moan from your lips.

As he gradually begins to build the pace you feel his cock swell inside you, filling you with every thrust. His tongue finds your ear and his deep moans send waves of hot shivers through your entire body. You grip his back, digging your fingers into his skin, feeling his toned muscles flex with his movements. His thrusts get faster and faster, until you're both panting and groaning each other's names into the air. 

Your lips find his as your walls begin to convulse around him. He gasps, his cock starting to throb inside you. He breaks away from you and buries his teeth into your neck as you climax together, riding it out in sheer euphoria until you collapse beside each other in heap.

After your breathing has calmed down and the sensations have subsided, leaving behind a contented drowsiness, you turn your head to Rick lying beside you. His eyes are closed and for a few minutes you simply watch his chest rising and falling, gradually slowing down as he recovers from his release.

'I will get you out, Y/N,' he says quietly, not opening his eyes.

You reach out to stroke his face and he takes your hand, holding it to his cheek and rubbing his thumb soothingly across the back.

'I will find a way. I promise.'


	11. Performance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan returns for you and you’ve made a plan with Rick to let Negan think he’s won you over. But will he believe your performance? Will Rick save you in time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in writing this one - hope you enjoy! This one is all drama no smut, but there's plenty of that to come! :)

_Knock, knock, knock._

You wake with a start. Last night comes rushing back to you. You'd fallen asleep almost straight away after Rick had made his promise to free you from Negan, hatching a plan together to get you out. You couldn't remember having slept so peacefully. Rick lies beside you, one arm draped over your stomach, his face smooth and untroubled.

'Guys, get up! He's here!' Someone whispers through the door, knocking again with more urgency.

Cradled in Rick's arms last night, you'd completely forgotten the outside world. From the walkers to the Saviors — it had all vanished. For a few blissful hours you'd been protected in your bubble. But now it had to burst.

'Rick... Rick!' You whisper, shaking Rick's shoulder. He stirs with a small groan then sits bolt upright. You see your fear reflected in his face. 'We have to go!'

Without another word, the two of you scramble to collect your clothes. Once you've slid the tight, red dress over your body and replaced the red lace panties, you and Rick rush for the door just as the knock comes again. You gasp in horror when Rick opens it to reveal Dwight.

'Hurry up, he's almost at the gates,' he whispers to Rick, avoiding your eye completely.

To your surprise, rather than punching him in the face because you'd just been discovered doing exactly what Negan had warned you _not _to do, Rick slaps Dwight on the shoulder with an air of gratitude. Then he turns to you and pulls you into a deep but brief kiss, and your chest aches for more. He looks at you for a moment, cradling your face in his strong hands. He gives you a small nod which you return with the best look of determination and courage you can muster. Then he's gone. Dwight turns to you, staring at the floor.

'Wait here 'til I come get you.' And he's gone too.

Your mind races, trying to catch up with what just happened. Was Dwight on your side and working with Rick? You can't see how or why he would risk betraying Negan... Unless he's playing Rick on Negan's orders and his plan is to tell him about your little indiscretion with Rick once you're returned to the confines of the Sanctuary where Rick can't protect you... Your heart pounds violently against your chest, nausea rolling over you as you begin to shake.

No. You have to calm yourself. Thinking over the plan you and Rick had come up with last night slows down your breathing a little and clears your mounting panic. Your best hope was the performance you put on for Negan — you had to convince him that he's winning you over. But you couldn't be too obvious and immediately relent to his demands, or he'll suspect you're acting. Plus, as he seems to enjoy watching you struggle, it would only make your eventual subjugation that bit more convincing. Nevertheless, he still needed to see that you took his threat seriously. That he'd rattled you. That he was close to breaking you. 

What feels like hours pass as you stand there, motionless, listening to your heartbeat over the escalating activity outside. You hear he distant sound of trucks and the sharp grating of the gate being opened, followed by the banging of car doors and a chorus of guns clicking as the Saviors point them at the Alexandrians. For a moment there's silence. Then comes the familiar arrogant drool that makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

'I've come to collect my goodies, Prick!' Negan crows, loud enough for the whole square to hear in the still air.

The sound of footsteps on the stairs breaks your focus and your heart-rate doubles. Rushing to compose yourself, you harden your expression just as Dwight appears in the doorway. He meets your eyes for one silent moment and you suddenly sense the sorrow washing off of him when he looks at you. He understands. In you he sees his wife, who's now dead because of Negan. He might be alone, but now Negan held no leverage over him. He no longer belonged to him.

You nod your head, trying to convey your new understanding and the overwhelming gratitude you suddenly feel for him. He really had been trying to take care of you all along. A new wave of confidence and determination soars through you as you follow Dwight out of the house and into the gentle orange glow of the morning sun. At least you'll have a friend beside you through this.

Negan stands in front of his entourage of thugs, three trucks parked in a line just inside Alexandria's walls, blocking the gate in an effective show of their offensive capabilities. At least two dozen of Negan's men have come to watch the parade, each of them armed to the teeth. Meanwhile the residents of Alexandria stand several yards behind Rick, looking comparatively malnourished and weak with only a handful of knives between them. Your blood boils at the sight, but you maintain your composure and walk resolutely towards Negan.

'Good _girl_, you kept that dress on just for me? Well ain't it my lucky day,' he coos salaciously, trailing his eyes up and down your body. He licks his lips before flashing you a row of perfect white teeth in his signature devilish grin, the lust in his eyes burning for everyone to see.

You feel a deep blush creeping up your cheeks, but you refuse to drop your gaze and succumb to your embarrassment. Rick would convince everyone of your innocence in this, but you're not about to let Negan make you roll over in front of them just to prove you now belong to him. Or so he thinks.

You reach his side, Dwight standing slightly behind you. Negan's gaze lingers on you for a moment before turning to face Rick. Rick's face is hardened, his jaw clenched. He doesn't tear his eyes from Negan, not even to meet your stare. You can sense the hatred and defiance rolling off of him and unfortunately Negan notices it too. From the corner of your eye you see Negan's eyes narrow and his lips curl into a harsh sneer.

He steps slowly and deliberately towards Rick, who stands his ground, his hand resting on the hatchet at his hip. You know he's calculating what the chances would be of him successfully driving it through Negan's skull before two dozen bullets tore him apart. As though he's read Rick's mind, Negan brings Lucille down from her resting place on his shoulder to point directly at Rick, the tip of the wire-wrapped bat now only inches from his face. But Rick continues to stare at Negan as though he did not notice the threat in front of him.

'I don't like the way you're looking at me, Rick. Not. One. Bit,' Negan growls in a low voice, his controlled anger just palpable enough to make the Alexandrians shrink back a little.

'Take her, Negan. She's yours. Just know that one day... I'm gonna kill you,' Rick says quietly, but the threat in his voice is real and strong.

A terror rises in you alongside the thrill of adrenaline. Half of you wants to give in to the fight building in your body, but the other half wants to throw yourself at Negan's feet, begging to leave Rick alone and promising to do anything he wants if it keeps Rick safe. But you stay rooted to the spot, trying to control your breathing and keep your fists from clenching.

Negan lowers Lucille slowly to his side. The whole square is silent and the tension tangible as everyone watches, waiting for Negan's reaction. He lets out a low chuckle and a shit-eating grin spreads across his face.

'Now Rick, I can't have that,' he says almost jovially.

Your stomach squirms as Negan turns to look at you, tracing his tongue across his teeth. Then his gaze flits back to Rick again and something flashes across his face. His eyes darken and his grin falls into a look of fury as realisation dawns over him.

You've lost already. But how could he possibly know? Panic builds up inside you like bile in your throat and it takes everything you have to keep it from showing on your face. If Negan guesses, you're surely dead. Or else Rick is.

Negan strides slowly over to you until his body is so close you can feel his heat radiating from him, and the smell of leather, whisky and tobacco filling your nostrils. You stare fixedly ahead of you, your eyeline reaching his leather-wrapped chest.

'Look at me, darlin',' he growls commandingly in his deep, gravelly voice.

When you don't obey he grabs your chin in a rough hand and tugs your head up so that you're forced to look directly at him. He searches your eyes, his hot breath tickling your face and the intensity of his stare forcing the breath to hitch in your throat. Your heart pounds loudly in your chest. You swallow, your mouth dry, praying that your fear doesn't give you away.

'Did you fuck him?' Negan suddenly shouts, his deep voice booming through the still air and making you jump.

'No, Negan... I s-swear,' you stammer, your composure suddenly crumbling.

To your surprise, he drops your face and steps now in front of Dwight, shoving his face aggressively close to his so that they're almost nose-to-nose.

'Did she fuck him, Dwight?' He growls quietly, the sudden change in his voice setting you even more on edge. His anger and unpredictability terrifies you more than any walker.

Dwight looks Negan straight in the eye and says in a low but firm voice, 'No, sir. I was outside her room all night to make sure.'

After a moment that seems to stretch on forever, Negan nods once then steps back and looks from you to Rick, tracing the tip of his tongue along his lower lip.

'Well Prick, looks like you've been a good boy after all,' he says, his playful tone back in place as he thrusts his hips forwards and swings Lucille casually by his side.

You exhale in relief, only now realising you'd been holding your breath. Negan swaggers over towards Rick and your stomach flips in fear, but then he's moving straight past him towards the huddle of Alexandrians. The whoosh of Lucille flying through the air, the deafening sound of a skull cracking, and a body hits the floor. Five more cracks and the blood-curdling sound of an agonised scream somewhere in the distance fills the orange sky. Denise - the woman who had pulled the bullet from your leg - lies in a blossoming pool of blood, her face now unrecognisable.

'Now if I learn that you two _did _have some fucking fun time together, that head that's now spewing out brains will be _her's_,' Negan chimes playfully, pointing a blood-stained Lucille directly at you.


	12. Savior

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You find yourself back in the cell at the Sanctuary, refusing to eat or drink anything in defiance. Then Negan shows an uncharacteristic concern and does something that sparks a new feeling for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one to set up for the events of the next few chapters! (Will be very VERY smutty)

How did it come back to this?

You sit curled up against the hard stone wall, your knees tucked under your chin and your head resting on your arms, eyes wide in search of some glimpse of light in the impenetrable darkness. Your aching limbs cry desperately to be moved, but you haven't been able to unstick yourself from this position since you were dumped here by one of Negan's men. For some unknown reason, Dwight had been replaced as your jailor by a man named Simon. The terrified part of you wonders whether Dwight was dead, or perhaps sporting some new scar to match his maimed face.

On the way back to the Sanctuary, you had been surprised by the fact that Negan hadn't immediately snaked his arm around your waist and not let go. But instead you had been ordered into the back of an open pick-up truck with only Dwight to guard you. The deafening rumble of the truck's engine had allowed you to exchange a brief conversation about what the hell was going to happen next.

'He won't take you back straight away, Y/N. He plays the long game,' Dwight had said in a tone so low that it almost matched the pitch of the truck's droning engine. You'd had to lean in as close as you dared to hear him without giving away to the truck following behind you that you were talking.

Keeping your lips as still as possible, you'd replied, 'What do you mean?'

'It's all about breaking you,' Dwight had said with a resigned sigh. 'He let you stay at Alexandria so the memory of what you've lost is sharper in your mind when he makes his next move. To show you you're not in control anymore. And that neither is Rick. Those threats, that murder... it's all to keep you lot in line. He's never wasteful when he kills — each one has a purpose.'

'I've made a plan with Rick. I'm going to let Negan think he's won me over, that he controls me. Whatever it is he's after. Then once I earn some freedom through his trust, Rick's going to break me out and we're going to take the Saviors down.'

Dwight had closed his eyes and sighed again.

'You don't think it'll work? Then tell me whose side you're on, Dwight!' You'd said angrily through gritted teeth.

'I'm with Rick. With you. I want Negan dead, but you don't understand. He _gets _people. He knows how they think, and he knows exactly what it takes to make them his. Negan won't leave you alone, he won't allow you any freedom 'til he believes you're loyal to him. With you, he doesn't even seem to need any leverage. Sure he's threatened Rick, but he needs Rick alive to keep Alexandria in tow. He needs the supply. For whatever reason, Negan's sees something in you that can be persuaded to his side without properly threatening anyone you care about.'

At this point you'd dropped your face to the floor to conceal your blush. The memory of the orgasm Neganhad coaxed out of you and the disappointment that had followed when he'd denied you feeling any satisfaction or release from it by punishing you - only making you somehow more desperate for his pleasure - crashed over you in a sickening realisation. Dwight was right. Negan had spotted your weakness, your darkness. Twisted though it may be, it's all he needed to bend you to his will and make you his. But then you remembered your night with Rick, the softness of his affection and passion of his touch. You'd felt a deep shame roll over you.

'I'll do everything I can to help you Y/N, but I can't promise I'll be much use. I doubt Negan will trust me with you now. He's suspicious of you and Rick. I'll try talk to Rick next time I'm collecting supplies from Alexandria. But if you two are serious about fighting Negan, you've only got one shot. And one of you will probably die,' Dwight had said in a flat voice, pulling you from your spiralling.

_He was right,_ you think now as you adjust your back against the wall of your cell. It was only a matter of time before Negan broke you completely, and you have no idea what sort of person you'd be by the end. But you weren't about to go down without a fight.

The door in front of you opens with a hideous scrape, breaking you out of your reverie.

'How're we doin' in here?' Comes Simon's condescending drool.

His protruding forehead and obnoxiously large, black moustache swim into view. He looks down at you with a cold, twisted smile, bearing a tray of food and water.

'Hungry?'

You say nothing, resting your face in your arms wrapped around your knees, waiting for him to leave.

'Okay then, see you the same time tomorrow sweetheart,' he says cheerfully, shutting the door again and taking the tray with him.

The next day passes the same, but by the third you can feel your body shutting down. Every inch of you aches with dehydration and you can barely open your eyes for the pain of the light streaming through the door when Simon opens it, tray in hand.

'Right, Negan says if you don't at least drink something you're gonna die. So just take the fuckin' tray darlin' and save me the trouble of having to kill your walker ass tomorrow,' he says exasperatedly.

You don't respond. You have no desire to die, but nor do you want to do anything that'll please Negan. Simon lets out a loud sigh and drops down in front of you. Placing the tray beside you, he picks up the bottle of water and holds it directly in front of your face.

'Come on for fuck's sake, don't make me force it down your fuckin' throat honey,' he says in a patronising tone that makes your toes curl. With another sigh, Simon taps the top of the bottle on your forehead three times, mimicking a knock. 'Anyone in there?'

'Leave me alone,' you croak, your throat so dry that you're barely audible. Simon laughs and the noise assaults your ears like a siren as the ache in your head swells.

Then suddenly he grabs your hair with a rough hand and tugs, pulling your head up out of your arms to look at him. In a split second act of defiance, you spit directly in his face. You know you've gone too far. Dropping your head to wipe it from his face, he gets to his feet and towers above you. You can only make out the blur of his silhouette against the light spilling though the open door, your eyes stinging but dry from your dehydration.

'You wanna play it that way, huh?' Simon leers.

You wait for the inevitable price you'll have to pay for your stunt, and somewhere your brain registers fear. But your body and mind are too tired and heavy with exhaustion and dehydration. You know you won't be able to fight whatever he throws at you. Then the sound of a belt unbuckling stirs something else inside you. A deeper terror that runs right to your bones, and you look up to see Simon unzipping his pants above you.

'I'll give you something to eat, you little bitch,' he sneers at you.

He has your head in his hands before you can move, straddling his legs either side of you. You try to muster a scream but your throat is completely dry. Just as he reaches one hand down to pull on your chin and force open your mouth, a loud bang on the door makes you jump. Simon releases you and whips around, hurriedly zipping up his pants.

'What the _fuck _do you think you're doin', Simon?' Comes a deep, gravelly growl from the door.

Your aching eyes can't make out anything more than his silhouette, but you recognise his voice. His scent. The stance of his hips thrust slightly forward. The outline of a baseball bat resting on the door. To your immense surprise you feel the most welcome rush of relief washing away your sickened fear.

'Sorry boss, I was just tryin' to get her to drink somethin'. She's refusin',' Simon stammers, hastily refastening his belt.

'Get the fuck out, you disgustin' piece o' shit. I'll deal with you later,' Negan growls, the menace in his voice making the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

Simon doesn't wait to be told twice and is out of the door in a flash. Negan waits until the sound of his footsteps disappears down the corridor, before dropping down in front of you. He places Lucille carefully on the floor behind him and reaches a hand for your face. You flinch instinctively but his touch is uncharacteristically gentle as he strokes the back of his finger lightly across your cheek. Then he places his palm softly on your forehead.

'Damn girl, you're burnin' up,' he says quietly, the playful tone suddenly seeming much less sinister following Simon's voice which still rings in your ears. 'You need to drink somethin' darlin'.'

'Leave me alone,' you repeat in a hoarse whisper, shrugging off his hand and burying your face back in your arms.

'I can't,' Negan says with a soft chuckle, 'you'll die if I leave you here.'

'You're the one who _put_ me here. Why should you care?' You hiss back at him.

'I ain't goin' through all this effort just to let you die in a fuckin' cell, doll. Why don't you come with me and I'll fix you up.' 

Negan gets to his feet and you look up to see him offering a hand to you.

Your mind is too heavy and exhausted to wonder whether this might be a trap. His sudden gentleness had taken you off guard. He had saved you from Simon's attack. For better or worse, you decide to comply. Taking his hand, he hauls you slowly to your feet but you stumble as your head begins to spin and your aching legs give way beneath you.

'I got you,' Negan growls in his deep voice, wrapping one arm around your back and hooking the other behind your knees.

Before you have a chance to protest, he's lifting you up with apparent ease and cradling you against his chest. The smell of leather and tobacco washes over you as your head falls against his shoulder. The heat from his exposed neck is oddly comforting and his strong arms hold you remarkably steady as he turns to leave the cell.

'What about Lucille?' You mumble croakily.

'I'll get her in a sec. Let's sort your pathetic ass out first,' he growls, not bothering to conceal the amusement in his tone, although his voice is still softer than usual.

You know that later you'll feel pathetic and ashamed, and probably incredibly angry about this. But right now all your exhausted mind can focus on is his intoxicating scent and the feeling of his strong arms wrapped around you. 


	13. Bet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You wake up in Negan's bed and suddenly he's trying to take care of you, but you know better than to trust him. Your only hope is to beat him at his own game, but he knows exactly how to get to you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the feedback, it's really encouraging me to keep writing! Next chapter will be up asap, hope you enjoy :)

You wake up in the warmest and softest bed you'd ever felt beneath you. It was perhaps even more comfortable than the bed you'd had before the world turned. For several long minutes you simply lie there, relishing in the comfort. The aching weight had almost completely disappeared from your body.

As you slowly come to your senses, you notice a small tugging sensation in your arm. Someone is whistling a tune. You instantly freeze, the memory of Negan carrying you out of that cell catching up to you. Horror spreads through you like ice as you come to the sickening realisation that this must be _his _bed you're lying in. _His _whistling you can hear from somewhere across the room.

As carefully as you can, you move your hand beneath the covers to feel what is tugging on your arm. Your fingers wrap around a thin tube attached to a needle. You wince slightly as you slowly drag it out of your skin, looking up to see a drip standing beside your bed. You have to marvel at the resources Negan must have in this place if he could afford to put you on a drip. But now you're rehydrated, your muscles have just enough strength to give you the courage to sit up and confront him. Your throat, however, is still drier than sandpaper. So your voice comes out in the same hoarse croak as before, only making you feel even more pathetic and angry.

'What am I doing here?' You rasp as loudly as you can.

Negan stands at the kitchen-like area of his enormous room, sprinkling something over two plates of what looks like chilli. The delicious smell reaches your nose and your stomach groans loudly. Apparently having heard it, Negan lets out a low chuckle as he picks up the loaded plates and walks over to the coffee table sat between his two couches before returning to the sink. On the table you spot the water jug complete with ice and lemon. The scratching in your throat seems to double, screaming for you to run over there and down the lot.

'I made you dinner,' he says in a playful voice, his southern accent adding to the slightly condescending drool. Although there's still the same softness to it that you'd heard earlier.

It baffles you, but you know better than to trust him. So you make your decision. Remembering what Dwight had said about Negan playing the long game, you intend to act upon the resistance part of your performance so that Negan wouldn't get suspicious by your sudden compliance given that he'd just murdered your friend right in front of you and threatened to do the same to you in front of Rick.

'No thank you,' you answer in a polite voice, hoping that your cool refusal of his hospitality will annoy him.

Swinging your legs out of bed, you head towards the coffee table, your eyes fixed on the water jug. Half way across the floor you realise you're still in the tight red dress Negan had made you wear. Making every effort to maintain your composure, feeling Negan's eyes follow your movements, you sit yourself on the edge of the couch with your back to him, grab the jug and down it in one go. Then you place it back on the table and sit back into the cushions with your legs and arms crossed, trying to hide as much of your exposed flesh as possible.

Negan says nothing in response to your rebuff. He reaches over the couch from directly behind you, deliberately bending as close to you as possible so that his leather-wrapped chest almost brushes against your cheek and his intoxicating aroma fills your lungs. He lets out a small, deep groan as he stretches to reach for the jug on the table. Your breath catches in your throat, the sound immediately bringing the memory of your last experience on this very couch rushing to the surface — the moans he'd made as he'd reached his fingers deeper and deeper inside you...

You scrunch up your face in an effort to block the images from your mind, remembering Rick and how _he _had made you feel. And most importantly, remembering your plan. You shuffle further up the couch, away from his proximity as he grabs the jug and turns to the sink to refill it. When he reaches back over you again to return it to the table — despite the fact that he could simply walk around the couch to get to it — he tips the jug just enough to send a wave of ice-cold water splashing down your front.

'Oh I'm sorry honey, look at me bein' all clumsy!' He coos mockingly, setting the jug back on the table and strutting around it to sit on the couch opposite you.

You can't hide the blush creeping up your face as you watch Negan's eyes follow the droplets of water running down through your cleavage. Your dress is soaked, making your nipples poke through the wet material. You want desperately to cover yourself up, but you can't give Negan the satisfaction of seeing how uncomfortable and vulnerable he makes you feel. Instead you stare him down, working to keep your face as hard as possible. You watch him trace his tongue along his lower lip, taking it between his teeth, his eyes roaming over you unashamedly.

'Damn girl, you're makin' me fuckin' thirsty,' he growls, lust creeping into his playful tone.

He reaches for the water jug so you lunge forward to grab it and down the lot right in front of him, maintaining eye contact as you drink deliberately slowly until the very last drop is gone. You pick up his glass and tip the remaining ice cubes and lemon into it.

'Guess you'll have to wait for it to melt,' you say in an overtly flirty tone, leaning forwards to show off your cleavage as you place his glass in front of him.

His eyes flash and a low growl sounds in his chest as he regards you with the same look he gave Rick when Rick said he would kill him. You swallow the fear rising in your throat and stare back at him, silence stretching between you. Your heart pounds faster and faster in your ears. If he's going to try to humiliate you, you will just have to do the same to him.

'Eat,' Negan orders, the command in his voice replacing his previous playfulness.

You ignore his order and continue to stare at him, trying desperately to keep your breathing even. His face suddenly breaks out into a devilish grin, running his tongue over his perfect white teeth and cocking his head to one side, watching your silent rebellion.

'Look darlin', this is only going one of two ways. Either you eat with me, or I put you back in that cell and who knows... I might not be there to save your fuckin' ass the next time you piss off Simon,' Negan says playfully.

His mood swings give you whiplash and your stiff composure crumbles as a burst of rage suddenly breaks through. Somehow you feel betrayed.

'So not only are you _not_ going to punish him, but you'd let him try it again? How fucking twisted are you?!' You spit, your voice rising in anger. 'I get why you kill people Negan. You're the big, bad fucking wolf who has to keep his sheep in line. But this?! Why do you fucking want_ me_? You have a hoard of wives under your command, ready to do any of the twisted, fucked up shit you fancy. What could _I_ possibly give you that you don't already have?' You realise you're now standing, bearing over him with your fists clenched at your sides.

'_This _is why I want you Y/N,' he grins up at you, leaning back into the cushions with his hands behind his head, thoroughly enjoying the show.

'What? You like seeing me pissed off at you, is that it? Does it give you a good fucking kick?' You shout at him, striding around the table and coming to stand in front of him threateningly close.

Negan doesn't even flinch. His eyes light up with lust as he scans over your body, your chest heaving in fury, the heat of anger in your eyes.

'See doll, you're right. I _am _the big, bad fuckin' wolf, and you know the problem with sheep?' He asks suddenly genially, leaning forward until his face is level with your waist. You stand your ground despite his proximity, too angry to shy away now. 'They're all the fuckin' same. But _you_... you Y/N, are somethin' else. You don't take _shit _and you sure as hell ain't afraid of me.'

The sudden sincerity in his voice and expression knocks you off guard. Before you know what you're saying you blurt out, 'I _am_ afraid of you.'

Negan chuckles softly, a mischievous smile spreading across his face as he leans back into the cushions, spreading his legs wide and resting his hands behind his head again. He surveys you with a cocky grin, licking his lips slowly and deliberately. He trails his eyes up your body before meeting your stare.

'You wanna bet?' He growls in a low voice.

You take a small, subconscious step back, wary of the direction this was heading. But your anger dominates and the adrenaline coursing through you is desperate for a fight. He takes your silence as his invitation to continue.

'I bet you you're _not _as afraid of me as you think. I bet there's a big part o' you that wants to show off how fuckin' strong you really are. And...' he leans forwards, his face inches from your groin. 

With one finger he brushes lightly along your thigh just below the hem of your dress, looking down at your legs. Then his eyes move slowly up your body until they meet yours, not hiding the intensity of the lust and hunger in his gaze. 

'I bet you'll do anything I ask just to prove it.'


	14. Tease

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It becomes a battle of power as you do everything you can to prove to Negan and to yourself that you aren't afraid of him, that you are not like the others who bow down in fear to Negan's will. But the lust inside of you betrays your control and puts the power into Negan's hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here comes the smut! Warning: dubious consent and rough oral. Will be plenty more and Rick will definitely be back! Thank you so much for the lovely feedback, I hope you enjoy!

Negan sits patiently, waiting for you answer, his breath tickling the inside of thighs. A finger still traces ever so lightly back and forth along the hem of your dress, leaving a tingling trail of goosebumps behind. 

'What'll it be darlin', you gonna prove me wrong?' He mocks, that shit-eating grin spreading beneath his trimmed salt-and-pepper beard, sparking both anger and inexplicable lust inside of you. 'Wanna run away back to your cell and refuse to eat or drink anythin' cos' you're too damn pussy to face me?'

'I'm not a fucking pussy,' you hiss through gritted teeth, anger and desire bubbling in a terrifying concoction. 'And I am _not _afraid of facing a smug asshole like you.'

'I don't believe you darlin',' he growls nonchalantly, letting go of you and leaning back into the cushions with his hands behind his head, surveying you with cocky condescension.

He makes your blood boil. He's touched a nerve. You'd always hated it when people assumed you to be weak. When they told you you couldn't do something because you weren't strong enough, or you were too afraid. But Negan wasn't going to win this one. You _know_ you're not afraid of him because right now you can't decide between punching the smug grin off of his face, or jumping his bones. The last thing you want to do is run away and hide.

Keeping your eyes trained on his, you slowly reach a hand down to the hem of your dress and begin to tug it up your thigh, steadily revealing more and more flesh until just a hint of your red panties is on show. Negan licks his lips, his eyes following your movements like a hawk.

Then he lunges forward and grabs your hand, stopping you in your tracks. He looks up at you with a dangerous expression on his face that sends shivers of anticipation down your spine. Suddenly your breathing is much less even as his touch sets your skin ablaze.

'I said you'll do anythin' I ask if you wanna prove to me you're not a weak ass fuckin' pussy,' he growls in a deep voice. 'That means _I'm_ in charge darlin'. You got that?'

You nod, trying to calm your rapid heartbeat. _I'll let you think you're in charge_, you think to yourself.

'Turn around,' Negan orders, a sharp commanding edge to his voice that sends another ripple through your body, this time coming to settle in your core.

You do as he says, slowly pivoting on the spot so that your tightly-wrapped ass, barely covered by the dress, is directly in front of Negan's face.

'Bend over,' he growls, his breathing getting heavier.

You bite your lip and obey, willing your legs to keep from shaking as the anticipation builds. His breath on your skin tells you his face is close. Then you feel the dress sliding up your body over your ass, revealing your panties. Negan lets out a soft moan in his deep, gravelly voice.

'That's a fine fuckin' sight,' he whispers, his lips brushing your skin and is beard tickling you as he talks. Trailing a finger up from the back of your knee to the inside of your thigh, he comes to rest just over your clit. He presses the little bundle of nerves slightly against the fabric of your panties, and the sudden pressure causes you to gasp involuntarily. Negan chuckles softly in response.

'If you're a good girl, I might even let you cum properly this time. Would you like that?' He growls, rubbing your clit in light tiny circles that make you crave more. You resist the temptation to push into his finger to create more friction.

'Answer me,' he growls authoritatively, suddenly grabbing your waist with his rough hands and jerking you back upright, spinning you around to face him.

Your jaw drops slightly at the sight of Negan firmly holding your hips as he looks up at you, his face directly in front of your pussy. With one hand he fiddles teasingly with the lace of your panties while the other squeezes your hip with bruising force.

'Yes please,' you exhale, your breath ragged and your mind fogging with a mounting desire that starts to obscure your anger with him.

Negan flashes a row of perfect teeth as he growls softly, 'Only if you do every fuckin' thing I tell you.'

You nod your assent, your body aching for some release from the teasing tension filling every inch of you. His touches awaken a wildness inside of you. You try to focus on the cause of your anger: playing the one card that would make you do anything to prove yourself by wagering your dignity that you weren't strong enough to handle him. But the the rising heat in your core blurs your thoughts.

'Good girl,' he moans, leaning towards your belly so that his beard tickles you through your lace panties, his lips almost touching the skin just above them.

'Wh-what do you want me to do, sir?'

His grin widens at your use of the title, pleased that you remember his liking for it last time.

'I want you to beg for me, doll,' Negan whispers, deliberately blowing on your skin and watching the goosebumps rise.

'Please,' you say in your best whimpering voice.

Negan meets your eyes for a moment, then pulls away, sitting back into the couch with a disappointed look on his face. Your anger suddenly returns to you but simultaneously, ridiculously, you have a desperate desire to please him.

'No darlin', I want you beggin' like you're pleadin' for you fuckin' life,' he growls menacingly, tugging your legs with his feet and pulling you closer to the couch so that your knees are touching the edge, Negan's legs on either side of yours. 'And by the time I'm done with you, you're not gonna be half actin' like you are now.'

You shudder at the hint of threat in his voice, but it only makes you more determined to prove him wrong. You'll do what he says because you're strong enough to handle him, trying to convince yourself that you're strong enough to keep a handle on yourself too. Whatever he does.

'Now darlin', how about you make a bit of a show for me and take that gorgeous dress off your smokin' body?' Negan hums, tracing his tongue along his lower lip before breaking out into a sly grin as he rests his hands lazily behind his head.

You oblige. Teasingly fingering the hem of your dress now resting just above your panties, you wiggle your hips playfully before turning to give Negan a side-view as you stick your ass out a little. His hungry eyes follow your movements and he bites his lip, letting out a soft moan of approval, his gaze running hungrily over your curves.

As you tug your dress further up your stomach, you turn back to face him and pull the material up just high enough to show the underside of your breasts. You glance down at his crotch and notice the growing bulge stretching his pants. Meeting his gaze from beneath your eyelashes, you bite your lip seductively to let him know you've seen his excitement. Seeing how crazy you're driving him with your teasing boosts your courage, giving you the power and control.

Resting the edge of your dress just below your nipples, you slowly climb onto the couch and straddle your legs either side of Negan's hips, hovering yourself just above his crotch. He keeps his hands behind his head. A devilish grin spreads across his face as he watches you running your hands over your body in front of him, wishing they were his.

'Well fuck baby, maybe I was wrong. You don't seem that afraid of me now huh?' He says in a deep growl. You shake you head, licking your lips seductively as you pull the dress over your head.

'Holy fuck girl,' he moans, suddenly grabbing your hips and pulling you into him, crushing his lips onto yours.

You can't help the small whimper that escapes you as he traces his tongue along your lower lip, biting and sucking it greedily. He runs his hands down your back, digging his fingernails into your skin and making you gasp and arch against his grip. Then suddenly you're in the air, Negan's hands tightly grasping your ass against his stomach as he stands up and carries you over to the bed. Dropping you unceremoniously onto it, he finally breaks the kiss. 

You lay there on your back in nothing but your panties, Negan standing over you with a wild look on his face. The cool, composed grin is replaced by a lust that makes your core ache while simultaneously chilling your blood. You'd never seen this look before; it felt even more unpredictable and dangerous than his usual playful, charismatic charm.

He takes no time in stripping off his jacket and shirt and you catch yourself staring at him in awe. The sight of his toned muscles, his tattoos, the trail of hair leading from his bellybutton to his groin like an invitation, awakes a primal hunger in you, breaking your seductive act.

'You make a delicious fuckin' sight there, Y/N,' he breathes heavily, running his hand through his hair and palming his bulge as he stares down at you.

You're suddenly too frightened to move, his lust and unbelievable body intimidates you. The ache in your core only grows the longer you listen to his heavy, ragged breaths.

'Get on your fuckin' knees,' Negan orders.

You can't seem to will your muscles to work. You simply stare up at him, eyes wide. The power you'd felt earlier in teasing him, doing what you could to prove to him that you're not afraid of him, seems suddenly childish compared the power he now has over you.

'I said _get on your fuckin' knees_,' he demands, anger inflecting his lust.

When you still don't move he grabs your hips and picks you up with ease, standing you in front of him. He crushes his lips once to yours then, gripping a fistful of your hair, he tugs your head back. You gasp, your scalp screaming a little in protest. You feel his lips tracing down your neck, nibbling at the vein in your jugular.

Somehow your fear and powerlessness only increases your primal need for him, and it terrifies you. You feel the same conflict as you did with him before; your reason trying to fight that dark urge inside you. But you're also still determined to win his bet and prove to him — and most importantly yourself — that you weren't scared of him. That you were different. That you could challenge him.

Negan yanks hard on your hair, making you yelp in pain as he pulls you down in front of him, forcing you to your knees. With his free hand, he whips his belt off and unzips his pants, allowing his erection to spring free. Your eyes widen at his size and your throat suddenly constricts, terrified of what will happen next.

'Get a good fuckin' look at it darlin',' Negan growls with a cocky smirk. 'You better fuckin' take _all _of it in that pretty lil' mouth of yours.' 

Negan grabs your chin, forcing your mouth open, and you let out an involuntary whimper.

'Aw, you scared of me now?' He coos mockingly, gently nudging the tip of his huge cock on your cheek and leaving a drop of precum clinging to your skin.

Your determination and anger return to you in response to his mocking. Looking him directly in the eye, you shake your head.

'Mm good girl,' Negan growls in a low voice that raises the hairs on the back of your neck.

In an effort to regain some small ounce of control, you stick out your tongue and flick it lightly across the tip of his cock, slurping up his precum and delighting in the moans escaping his lips.

Before you know it, Negan is thrusting his full length inside, abusing your mouth as he hits the back of your throat over and over with punishing force. His deep grunts and your strangled gags fill the air, spit dribbling down your chin and into your cleavage while he mercilessly fucks your mouth. You feel him harden even more against your lips and tongue, his girth pushing your mouth open as wide as it can go.

'Fuckin' hell that's good,' Negan groans. 

You watch him throw his head back with another guttural moan. The sight sends a wave of arousal to your core and you're suddenly have the desperate desire to please him, to elicit more delicious sounds from him. He looks down at you and a grin spreads across his face when he sees the lust now burning in your eyes.

'You look like you're actually fuckin' _enjoyin' _this! I knew you couldn't resist me for long,' he cries playfully with one final thrust jabbing the back of your throat.

He holds himself there, listening to you gag around his length with an arrogantly satisfied smirk on his face.

'But I think that's enough for now, darlin'. Daddy's got wives who need his attention more than you,' Negan growls, pulling himself free with a 'pop' and tucking himself back in his pants.

You're stunned. Your throat aches from his abuse. The only noise you can make in protest is a pathetic gargling sound.

'Aw honey, don't look at me like that!' He pouts, bending down so his face is level with yours. He hooks a finger under your chin and says with a wink, 'You've gotta fuckin' _earn_ it, baby.'

Then he's gone, leaving you kneeling there in nothing but Negan's red panties, spit dripping down your face and neck, staring at the door he's just locked behind him.


	15. Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dwight comes to your rescue and reveals a plan that could change everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long since I've updated this, life has been pretty hectic recently! I will try my best to add chapters as fast as possible. FYI the Negan smut is far from over. Thank you for reading!!! Hope you enjoy :)

You don't know how long you sit there staring at the door. Eventually the ache in your knees pushes you to your feet and your legs carry you over to the couch. You're completely numb. The heat of your anger, defiance and inexplicable desire for Negan had been doused by the icy cold bucket of water Negan had chucked over you by leaving the both of you unfinished. But he at least would get his release from one of his wives, while you are left there to feel the full force of your shame and lust.

When your mind wanders to Rick, hot tears sting in your eyes. Within seconds you're wracked by a tidal wave of sobs. You sit there for what feels like hours, hands gripping your hair in tight fists, rocking back and forth on Negan's couch until you cry yourself dry. Eventually darkness takes you.

'Y/N, wake up,' comes a soft voice somewhere close to your ear.

A hand gently shakes your shoulder. You're lying on the couch, curled up in a ball with your arms wrapped tightly around your knees.

'Quickly, there isn't much time.'

You begrudgingly open your eyes. Peering through bleary tears you see the scarred face and shaggy blonde hair of Dwight just inches away. You instinctively jerk back, sitting up too quickly as your head spins.

'It's okay, I'm on your side I swear,' Dwight whispers. His eyes are full of pity and concern but you don't trust him, even if Rick seems to.

'What are you doing here? How did you get in?' You reply in a hoarse voice.

'I stole the key from Negan, but he's gonna be back real soon. You have to trust me. I'm gonna get you out of here.'

You stare at him in disbelief, shaking your head in an attempt to clear it. After he'd left you to Negan's mercy once you'd returned to the Sanctuary, you'd assumed he was on Negan's side all along, just playing Rick as some kind of double-agent. But if that were true, why would he go to the risk of stealing Negan's key just to come to your rescue? None of it made sense.

'Put these on. You can't go out there like that,' he says, handing you a pair of jeans, a shirt and some boots. 'They should fit, you're about the same size as Sherry. Those were hers.'

Sherry. Of course. 

'Thank you,' you whisper, trying to inject as much understanding and gratitude into those two words as possible.

He meets your eyes for a moment and you know he's understood. He gives you a nod and walks away to the kitchen area while you hastily shove on the clothes. You're not even embarrassed to be found almost entirely naked. Dwight knew Negan and what he did to the women he fancied. He doesn't think any the less of you.

'Come on, we have to leave now if we're gonna make it. Negan is out on a run but he'll be back in less than an hour. If we're lucky we'll be well away from here by then. I've got a truck waiting,' Dwight says in a low voice, rushing around the kitchen collecting food into a rucksack.

You have to admire his nerve for not only breaking you out but stealing directly from Negan's own personal stores.

'Where are we going?' You ask, hastily shoving on the boots.

Dwight stops for a moment, eyes running over your body as you stand there in his dead wife's clothes. You pretend you didn't see the sadness cross his face before he quickly recomposes himself and replies.

'Hilltop. Jesus is going to meet you half way, that's where I'll leave you. He'll take you back and hide you — Negan doesn't ever go there. Only his men when they're collecting supplies. You should be safe, and Rick will be there at some point to tell you the plan.'

Your heart skips at the mention of Rick, but your moment of elation is clouded by the intensity of your shame at what happened with Negan last night, the pleasure and desire you felt at his hands. Burying those thoughts for now, you try to focus on what's happening.

'What plan?' You whisper, stomach turning in fear. 'This isn't what Rick and I had planned back in Alexandria.'

'No, this was my idea. We're gonna bring down the Saviors. We're gonna kill Negan.' There's no doubt in Dwight's eyes. He means it. 

'Come on, let's go.'

********

You throw yourself into the back of the truck in the nick of time. A guard comes out and accosts Dwight, but he doesn't seem to have spotted you.

'Where're you goin'?' Comes a slimy drool. 'Ain't you meant to be guardin' that new chick o' Negan's?' 

You lie flat on your stomach, not daring to breathe. If the guard were to look through the back window he'd be sure to spot you, and you and Dwight would both be finished.

'Relax Tony, I'm just heading up to that old pharmacy a couple o' miles up the road,' Dwight replies nonchalantly.

'What for?' Barks the man named Tony.

'Negan instructed I take care of her every need, and well... women have some needs men don't... particularly at certain times of the month...' he says. You can't help but grin at Dwight's tactics.

'Oh... oh right...' Tony splutters, clearly uncomfortable. 'I guess you'd better, err, get goin' then,' he says gruffly, attempting in vain to regain an authoritative tone.

'Yep. If you could just open the gate for me,' Dwight says with poorly suppressed amusement in his voice.

'Sure, sure...'

You hear the man move away as Dwight gets into the truck. The floor beneath you vibrates violently against your ribcage when he starts the engine.

'We're here,' Dwight calls back to you about an hour later, cutting the engine. 

He opens the back doors of the truck and you find yourself looking across a large overgrown field with a forest stretching for miles behind it. You don't recognise the place at all.

'Hey Y/N, you okay?' Comes a familiar voice.

Stepping into view from behind the truck is Jesus. You breathe a sigh of relief, but your stomach twists into knots at the thought of confronting Rick after what had happened with Negan.

'Rick'll be so happy to see you,' Jesus says with a chuckle, pulling you into a hug.

You manage a half-smile, but words have completely escaped you. The wave of guilt and shame crushes down over you.

'You should get a move on. Negan'll know you're missing by now,' Dwight says in a tense voice, looking from you to Jesus.

'Are you sure he won't come looking for me at Hilltop?' You ask, unable to conceal the anxiety in your voice.

If Negan even let you live for the stunt you'd pulled today, your punishment was sure to be brutal if he found you.

'We can hide you,' Jesus says in a calm voice. 'There are some underground sewers beneath Hilltop. The entrance is well-hidden, they won't find you there. We have scouts on the look out round the clock. If Negan comes for you, we'll know. He won't find you, Y/N. Trust me.'

You nod, swallowing the bile rising in your throat. You can't decide what you're more afraid of: telling Rick what happened with Negan, or the thought of Negan finding you. Turning to Dwight, you take his hand in yours.

'Thank you... so much. For everything.'

He squeezes your hand and gives you a nod, but doesn't say anything. He turns to Jesus.

'Go. Now. I'll see you up at Hilltop in a week or so.'

With that, he gets into the truck and is gone. You wonder what fate awaits him back at the Sanctuary. Will Negan believe he had nothing to do with your escape? Does he trust him that much? Your stomach drops. Negan doesn't trust anyone. You probably won't see Dwight again.

'Come on, we should go,' Jesus puts a hand on your back and guides you away from Dwight's retreating truck. 

'You okay on a bike?' He says with a grin, gesturing to an enormous motorbike resting on the side of the road.

'Fuck yes,' you grin back.

You used to have a real thing for motorbikes before the world had turned. It had been years since you'd been on one, but the sight of it rekindles an old excitement. You allow it to swallow you, pushing out the shame and dread.

'Let me ride it?' You ask Jesus hopefully.

He considers you for a moment, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. 

'Go ahead.' 


	16. Hilltop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesus takes you to Hilltop, where you're introduced to Maggie and a rough-looking man armed with a crossbow who doesn't look like he'll be trusting you anytime soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Debating whether or not to introduce some potential Daryl smut into this - any thoughts???
> 
> This is just a short one, the next chapter will either be Daryl-centred or go straight into the Negan v. Rick drama I have planned for later! If you prefer one or the other, let me know in the comments! :)

The feeling of the wind rushing through your hair and the adrenaline pumping through your veins as you speed along the roads washes away all thoughts of Negan and Rick. Following Jesus's directions, you eventually arrive at a tall wall made from large wooden logs. You cut the engine just outside and hop off of the motorbike. The sound of a gun clicking above you has your head snap up and your hand fly instinctively to your waist, only to remember you no longer have even so much as a knife.

'Easy Maggie, this is Y/N. Rick's newest recruit,' Jesus calls to a woman stood in a guard-post at the top of the wall, pointing a gun directly at you.

'What's she doin' here?' The woman named Maggie calls, not lowering her gun. 'Ain't she meant to be at the Sanctuary?'

'She escaped. She's gonna be hiding here 'til we go through with the plan... Rick's orders, Maggie,' he says when she doesn't relent.

After a few moments she nods, hooking her gun up on her shoulder. 

'Let her in.'

Jesus steps in front of you as the gate opens, revealing a collection of makeshift workshop stalls and a row of container homes topped with solar panels beside a large, old-fashioned mansion. The woman named Maggie stands before you, a hard, untrusting look on her face. Your eyes immediately fall to the bump protruding slightly through her shirt. You remember what Rick had told you when you'd first arrived in Alexandria about Abraham and Glenn - that Glenn had had a wife... 

Your heart sinks at the sight of Maggie and her unborn child. Rick had said that she was hiding from Negan too. The idea that Negan had stripped her of her husband and the father of her child only intensifies your shame at the lust you'd felt for him only yesterday.

'How d'you escape?' Maggie asks you, looking straight past Jesus. She regards you with a steely, defensive glare and you can tell by her tone and demeanour that she's the leader.

'Dwight broke me out of...' you change course at the speed of light, not wishing for anyone to know about your relations with Negan. '... out of my cell at the Sanctuary. He brought me to Jesus, then went back to cover my escape. He practically sacrificed himself to get me out, I doubt Negan will believe any alibi he concocts...'

'Well I guess we know for sure he's on our side now,' she gives you an approving nod and you relax a little. 'Jesus, why didn't you tell me about this?'

'Rick only told me and Dwight, didn't even tell Y/N. He didn't want it getting back to any of the Saviors that we were planning on breaking her out. He'll be coming up here next week to figure out the plan. Right now he's out looking for weapons at some place Y/N mentioned.'

'It's quite a ways out from Alexandria,' you chime in quickly. 'I found it when I was on the road - it's a good bet.'

Maggie nods again. 'Come in. I'll introduce you to Daryl, he's on the run from Negan too. He'll show you how to get to the underground sewers where you'll be able to hide when Negan's men come knockin',' she says, turning and walking towards one of the container homes.

You follow her, Jesus close behind you, keeping your head down amid the mutters from the surrounding Hilltop residents. She leads you into a plain, characterless room comprising of a pair of single beds on opposite walls, a table, a bookshelf and a small kitchen area.

'This her?' Comes a low, gruff voice from the corner.

Your attention is drawn to a man sitting in a chair, a crossbow perched between his legs and a set of blood-stained arrows and a grubby-looking cloth in his hands. He puts the arrows and crossbow to one side and saunters over to you, eyes narrowed and a shrewd expression on his face. His hair is long and shaggy, almost reaching his strong shoulders exposed by the sleeveless jacket he wears. Your eyes trail subconsciously over his muscular arms. He walks with a slight swagger; not the cocky strut Negan parades, but the cooly confident stride of a man who's seen and done a lot of things and would not easily succumb to any kind of fear.

'Daryl, this is Y/N. Rick's recruit,' Maggie explains to the man, who listens without taking his eyes off of you, like a hunter eyeing up a potential kill. 'Negan kidnapped her a couple o' weeks ago, an' Dwight broke her out under Rick's orders.' 

Daryl grunts at the mention of Dwight, as though unconvinced by his loyalty. 

'He's on our side, Daryl,' she reassures him.

'It's true,' you cut in, your voice a little louder than you'd expected in your haste to defend Dwight. 'He broke me out of... my cell when Negan was on a run and brought me to Jesus. He went back to cover my escape. Put himself in a lot of danger for me. He told one of the guards who caught him trying to take a truck that he was getting supplies for me under Negan's instruction. Negan will find out, Dwight's probably dead now anyway...' you finish, feeling a twinge of sadness for the scarred man. You try to forget the fact that you're standing in his dead wife's clothes.

Daryl tilts his head back slightly, surveying you with suspicion etched all over his face.

'How do we know we can trust you?' He growls, stepping towards you so his face is just inches away.

You resist the temptation to step back, determined to prove your fidelity. If he's loyal enough to his group to be so cautious of you, only one thing could possibly convince him.

'Because Rick trusts me.'

Daryl's expression is unreadable. He doesn't move away. You stare directly into his eyes, your face hard.

'How'd you get to Alexandria?' He asks, his hot breath playing across your cheeks.

'Rick found me in the woods with a bullet in my thigh. He brought me back and fixed me up. After a couple of weeks I was well enough to start guard duty, but Negan showed up earlier than he was meant to and threatened to kill me if Rick didn't let him take me back to the Sanctuary,' you explain, wishing for your heart to stop racing in your chest.

You have a feeling Daryl is a hard man to gain trust with, but you also suspect that once you do, he's the most loyal friend you could wish for.

'Negan threatened to kill _you _if Rick didn't let him take you?' He says with a slight tone of surprise.

'Yes.' 

Daryl stares at you for a few moments longer before finally stepping back, nodding to Maggie and Jesus.

'She's stayin' here with me,' he says authoritatively, retreating to his chair where he picks up his arrows and resumes their cleaning. 'I'll keep an eye on her. Negan's after both of us so we should stick together when he comes lookin'. You know he'll check here once he sees she ain't in Alexandria.'

'If you're sure...' Maggie mutters with a glance to Jesus, who nods in agreement. 'C'mon, I'll show you the sewers,' she says, gesturing to you to follow her out of the room.

You glimpse back at Daryl and see his eyes trained on you, his face expressionless. You don't know why, but you find yourself intrigued by him.


	17. Impulse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three days into your stay at Hilltop and you're beginning to find yourself drawn to Daryl but he seems to be deliberately avoiding you. That is until you share a moment of impulse that turns into something neither of you can resist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long! As requested - Daryl smut! It's a long one but plenty of smut... hope you enjoy! Thanks as always for the feedback - much appreciated!!! :)

It's been four days since you arrived at Hilltop. Maggie had shown you around and you'd been given the job of training the less experienced Hilltop residents how to use a knife. Daryl hadn't said a word to you since your first encounter. In the evenings when you returned to your cabin he was never there and you were so tired from training and teaching all day that you would fall asleep on top of your bed without even changing your clothes. By the time you'd wake up, Daryl was gone.

You caught glimpses of him occasionally, coming in through the gates with a bird or a rabbit flung over his shoulder and his crossbow in hand. He usually avoided eye-contact with you as though you didn't exist. But today was different.

You were busy showing a bold, red-headed woman - whose name you could not remember - how to throw a knife. Your students were lined up in front of make-shift targets consisting of burlap sacks tied to wooden poles and painted with rings, for which they were meant to be aiming. So far not one of them had even hit the sack, let alone the rings. You were concentrating on your students so you hadn't noticed Daryl leaning against the wall of your cabin, watching you intently.

'Okay guys, great work,' you called, drawing your students' attention onto you. 'I think it'll help if I do another demo for you. Watch closely: how I hold the knife by the tip of the blade with the handle pointing to the sky. I pull my arm back like I'm gonna throw a javelin,' you say, illustrating your actions. 'Then flick my forearm forward, keeping my wrist firm so the knife doesn't fly to the the ground. That way it should follow the direction of my forearm.'

You throw the knife at the target and hit it right in the centre. Your students nod enthusiastically and begin attempting to replicate your actions. The woman you'd been focusing on manages to hit the middle ring and grins widely at you.

'Excellent! Keep it up!' You smile at her, patting her on the shoulder as you move up the line.

That's when you see him out of the corner of your eye, leaning casually against your cabin, crossbow resting on his shoulder. He's watching you with a surprised but impressed look on his weathered face. Your eyes subconsciously travel over his form, his exposed muscular arms rippling in the sunlight. You meet his gaze and for a moment you stare at one another, your breath catching in your throat when you think you see the hint of something else hiding behind his eyes.

Then he disappears into the cabin, leaving you gazing after him, utterly confused. What was it about him that drew you so much to him? You try to think of Rick, knowing you'll be able to see him in just a few days. But after the events at the Sanctuary, Negan's hold over you, your escape with Dwight... Rick seemed so distant. As though that blissful night you'd spent together was nothing more than the memory of a dream.

After another hour or so your group had made significant progress, with everyone having hit somewhere on the target at least once. The red-headed woman had eventually hit the bullseye three times in a row to raucous applause.

You turn towards the cabin, hoping in vain to see Daryl waiting there for you. But there's no sign of him anywhere. After four days trapped within these walls, you resent the idea of returning back to your tiny living space, and instead find yourself sneaking through the gates when the guards' backs are turned. They've left it unlocked, which means someone else must be out. Perhaps Daryl is hunting again, you think.

You wonder down the hill until you reach a lone tree in the middle of the grass looking out over a fantastic view of the surrounding forest, above which the sun is just beginning to dip, scattering golden beams across the darkening sky. Sitting down beneath the tree, you rest your head against the trunk and allow your eyes to close, drinking in the warmth of the setting sun on your face. It feels so good on your skin that you undo a few buttons on your shirt to expose more of it to the light, soaking in the heat.

'What the hell d'you think you're doin'?' Comes a gruff voice from somewhere directly above you.

You jump and let out an involuntary yelp of surprise which you immediately regret when you realise the voice belongs to Daryl. He's standing over you, a pair of rabbits in one hand and his crossbow in the other, a terrifying look of rage etched over his face.

'You tryin' ta get yourself killed, kid? You ain't even armed! Suppose a walker attacked you? _Suppose the Saviors showed up and saw you here?_' He shouts, the rabbits swinging limply in his hands as he wildly gesticulates.

You'd never pictured him as someone who got angry like this. He always seemed so calm and composed. Untouchable.

'Alright, alright! I'm fine, see?' You gesture to your unharmed body. His eyes narrow as they follow your hands and scan over you, lingering for the briefest moment on your exposed cleavage. 'I'd have heard a walker from a mile away. I was alone for months before Rick found me. You know how hard it is to sleep at night when you're by yourself? And if I can hear a walker coming, don't you think I would hear the sound of half a dozen trucks grinding their way up the hill? You're just... freakily quiet,' you snicker, eyeing him up. 

He stares at you for a minute, grumbling incoherently under his breath. But he doesn't retort.

'Care to join me?' You offer with a slight smirk, guessing how uncomfortable it would make him to be close another human being just by the fact that he was always alone and didn't seem to be close to anyone.

He considers you for a moment, sighing. To your surprise, he sets himself down beside you, careful to keep several inches gap between you. He lays the rabbits down next to him and takes his crossbow in his arms, loaded and prepared for attack as though he were waiting for a herd of walkers to appear through the trees at any second.

'Do you ever put that thing down?' You snigger, unsure where your sudden confidence has come from given that you've just been discovered dozing outside the walls at dusk with your shirt half undone.

Daryl answers with a dismissive shrug, ignoring your tease. The two of you sit there in silence, watching the sun gradually sink behind the trees, illuminating them with beautiful golden light. You sigh and lean your head back agains the trunk. Daryl shoots you a furtive glance and sighs too, shuffling backwards against the tree and leaning his head back like you. His eyes remain open and alert, however, his finger poised on the trigger of his crossbow.

'You should learn to relax more, it's good for you,' you mock, taking a great deal of satisfaction from making him feel uncomfortable.

You wonder why on earth he's still sitting here. Why he doesn't just persuade you to go back to Hilltop with him by sticking that crossbow in your back.

'That's how you get killed, kid,' he growls in a low voice, not meeting your gaze as you turn to watch him, a smile playing on your lips. Your eyes travel slowly down his body, unashamedly drinking in every inch of his physique.

You still have no idea what it was about him that had you so transfixed, just as you have no idea why he sits beside you when his instincts are clearly screaming for you both to get back behind walls before darkness swallows you. For whatever reason, it seemed that neither of you had any inclination to move from your spot beneath the tree.

'What did you do before all this?' You ask, curiosity getting the better of you. Daryl finally turns to face you and his eyes lock with yours, his soft blue gaze piercing straight through you.

'What does it matter?' He growls quietly. It's clear he's not going to give you an answer, so you open your mouth to ask your next question.

He cuts in over you. 'What 'bout you?'

A blush creeps up your cheeks and his eyebrows crease in confusion. 

'You weren't a stripper or somethin' like that, were ya?' He says gruffly, a small chuckle falling from him and the tiniest hint of a grin tugging at the corner of his lips.

'No! How dare—' You shout indignantly, but you're muffled by Daryl's hand covering your mouth. He leans in closer to you, an uncharacteristically mischievous glean in his eyes.

'Cos' it's okay if you were, I mean...' he hums mockingly, glancing deliberately down at your heaving chest. His sudden proximity has your heart racing beneath your ribcage, probably audible enough for his hunter's hearing to pick up.

He chuckles a little louder this time at the offended and indignant look in your eyes as you stare at him. When he loosens his grip over your mouth you jerk your chin up and bite his hand. He draws back, cursing you with a string of profanities.

'I was _not _a fucking stripper!' You spit at him, careful to keep your voice to a whisper this time, aware of the darkness descending around you and not wishing to draw the attention of any nearby walkers. 'I worked as... as a bartender.'

'Serious?' Daryl whispers with a definite smile curving his lips, drawing your eyes to them as your heart pounds faster in your chest. The blush deepens in your cheeks at the thought of him sensing your attraction to him, sure that he wouldn't possibly be attracted to you.

'So where'd you learn to throw knives like that?'

You shrug. 'Trial and error. I was always good with my hands and coordination. The bar I worked at sort of... required you to put on a bit of a show when mixing cocktails. Juggling and tossing bottles, doing all sorts of tricks...' You trail off as you watch Daryl's expression.

His gaze is intense and his eyes are fixed on your lips. He's leaning slightly towards you, his mouth slightly open and his breath coming faster.

'Daryl, I —' you begin, but he hushes you with a finger pressed against your lips.

'I don't do this. I don't... like people like this,' he whispers, eyes flitting between yours and your mouth.

You catch yourself leaning slowly closer to him, watching him with your breath held as you see the struggle in his expression.

'I don't let myself get too close... I'm too afraid to lose people,' he mumbles, his composure steadily breaking. But he can't help but lean ever closer to you.

Your faces are just an inch apart. His finger traces along your lower lip and he sighs in frustration, his hot breath playing across your face. You smell cigarettes and whisky, and it only throws your senses even further out of control.

'But you... you seem differen' somehow... like you can take care o' yourself. Hell, you got outta the Sanctuary unscathed. And when I was watching you teaching those folks earlier... You really learn that out on the road?' He murmurs, fascinated by you.

You nod, words momentarily escaping you; you can't believe what's happening. Your mind is completely blank, filled only with the sensation of Daryl's touch as his hand now comes to cup your cheek, the rough pad of his thumb tracing gently over your parted lips.

'You don't have to worry about me, Daryl. I promise,' you whisper against his thumb.

He meets your eyes with a blazing look, the struggle obvious behind them. But as desire overpowers him, Daryl crashes his lips onto yours in a fierce kiss. You fling your arms around his neck and entwine your fingers through his hair while your other hand runs over his stubbled jawline. Daryl slides his tongue hungrily along your lower lip before forcing his way into your mouth, eager to taste you. Moaning softly, you slide your hand from his face down to his chest, feeling your way over his taut muscles as he runs one hand through your hair, the other still clutching his crossbow defensively.

'We should head back inside,' he says breathlessly, pulling away from you.

You groan impatiently and tug on his hair, pulling him back into the kiss. A chuckle vibrates in his chest as he senses your desperation. He bites teasingly on your lip and lets out a low growl. Your body aches to be closer to him but he's pulling away and getting to his feet.

'Why can't we just stay here?' You mumble, knowing the answer before it leaves his mouth.

'It ain't worth the danger darlin'. C'mon,' he says gruffly, slinging the rabbits over his shoulder and making for the gate.

The desire you'd felt only moments ago is suddenly replaced by a cold hollowness as you watch him stalk away from you. Swearing under your breath, you get to your feet and follow behind him, resenting his sudden dismissiveness despite the fact that you know he's right. But you feel like the moment had gone as you enter through the gates, the guard not questioning the sight of you out late when he spots the rabbits hanging over Daryl's shoulder. You angrily do up the buttons on your shirt right up to your neck and cross your arms over your chest. When Daryl stops to give his kill to the butcher, you head straight for the cabin without a backwards glance.

You wait in vain for Daryl to return to the cabin, busying yourself with tidying the place up. But he doesn't come. Soon tiredness overcomes you and you resign to bed, undressing to your panties and pulling on a loose crop top before retreating between the sheets. You fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow, all the tension and excitement you'd felt before now drained from your body.

* * *

Something wakes you. Someone moving around the room. You lay completely still, lying on your side facing the wall and holding your breath as you listen. You had never heard Daryl come in at night before, he was always so quiet... But who else could it be? Surely you would know if Negan had finally come; you would have been woken and hurried underground to hide. You hear the sound of Daryl's bed creak slightly when they sit down on it, but you don't dare turn around, terrified that it might be an intruder.

'Hey... you awake?' A voice whispers from behind you. You recognise the low, gruff growl and breathe a sigh of relief.

'No,' you growl back, still angry at him for ruining the moment you had shared earlier. You inwardly confess that you're mainly angry with yourself for even allowing yourself to be attracted to Daryl when you should be thinking of Rick.

'Look, I'm sorry I disappeared. Maggie dragged me into a meetin' with her n' Jesus. They're worried 'bout Rick,' Daryl explains, his voice tense.

You sit up quickly and look at him. The unmistakable concern in his eyes ties a knot in your stomach.

'What's happened? Is he okay?' You ask quickly, your blood running cold at the images running through your head of Negan standing over Rick's lifeless body, laughing at the sight of his brains spattered across the ground and the blood dripping from Lucille...

'That's it, we dunno...' he says in a low voice, leaning forwards on the edge of his bed and resting his elbows on his knees, head in his hands. You're relieved to see that the crossbow isn't propped beside him for once. 'He went out on a run a few days ago lookin' for guns for the attack on the Sanctuary, but he ain't come back yet. No one's heard from him...'

You shuffle forwards and throw your legs over the side of the bed so you're sitting opposite Daryl. He follows your movements, his gaze lingering for a moment on your exposed legs and panties. In your worry about Rick, you completely forgot how little you were wearing. You try to subtly cover yourself with the sheet as you meet Daryl's eyes.

'I'm sure he's okay. If he's going to that place I told him about, he's had to go pretty far out. Maybe he just... run out of gas or something.'

'Hmm,' Daryl grunts, dropping his eyes to the floor.

'He'll be okay, Daryl. From what I've heard he's dealt with worse. He knows how to look after himself. He... he always comes back,' you say consolingly, trying to convince yourself as much as Daryl. You want desperately to reach out to him and take his hand, to comfort him in some way.

'We could go look for him? First light, you and me. With your crossbow and my knives, we'll be okay. We could take the motorbike. I used to ride my dad's old Triumph all the time when I was younger, so you don't have to worry about me leaning the wrong way and crashing us,' you smile, trying to lighten the mood.

After a moment he looks up at you, the same longing as before burning in his eyes and making your breath catch in your throat.

'You're jus' full o' surprises, ain't ya,' he growls with a low chuckle, holding your gaze. 'As much as I wanna find Rick — and love the sound o' going off into the wild with you — the best thing ta do is stay here. If Negan's got Rick, he'll wanna make a fuckin' spectacle of it. He'll make it known an' we'll need to stick together if we have any chance o' savin' him.'

You sigh and nod, knowing he's right again. But the knot in your stomach doesn't loosen.

'Hey...' Daryl whispers, reaching a hand out and stroking the back of his fingers gently down your cheek. 'He'll be okay. I can tell you care 'bout him as much as I do.'

'I thought you didn't get close to people,' you say with a small smile, your skin tingling in the wake of Daryl's touch.

Part of you hates that you crave him while you're also worried about Rick. But even now Rick seems so distant, and Daryl is so close... too close. He's leaning in towards you, his eyes fixed on your lips as his hand moves down your neck and strokes lightly along your collarbone.

'Daryl, we can't...' you whisper, taking his hand in yours and dropping your gaze to the floor, shame overwhelming you. 'Rick and I... we sort of got together...'

'How d'you mean?' Daryl asks, his voice monotone as he pulls his hand away. You keep your eyes fixed on the floor, terrified of seeing the anger in his face after you'd led him on earlier. 'Are you... a couple?'

'No, I... I'm not sure really. We just... spent a night together. Negan took me back to Alexandria after locking me in a cell at the Sanctuary for days... trying to break me,' you mumble, trying not to give away the methods he had used. 'He let me stay there for a night before he took me away again. To make sure I knew I'd never see that place again and just what I was losing if I didn't... comply.'

'Does Negan know 'bout you two?' Daryl questions, getting to his feet and pacing across the floor in front of you.

You recoil further back onto the bed, watching him, terrified what his reaction might be and hating yourself for wanting him still.

'No. Dwight saw but he kept our secret. He tried to take care of me while I was there,' you explain, trying to maintain your composure.

'You're a fuckin' idiot. You tryin' ta get yourself killed or somethin'?!' He shouts, making you jump.

'It just happened, Daryl!' You cry, standing up to face him, tears suddenly burning in the corners of your eyes. 'I don't even know what it meant, but if Rick gets killed because of me...'

'For fuck's sake,' Daryl growls, and then his lips are capturing yours, his rough hands gripping your face. All thoughts vanish from your head. All you feel is him.

Your hands find his waist and you pull his body closer. A deep moan vibrates in his chest as you curl your fingers under his shirt and explore his toned, hair-dusted abdomen. One hand travels up to his taut chest. With a finger of your other hand you trace a line just above his pants, hooking one teasingly beneath the material just above his crotch. He reacts instantly to your touch, knotting a hand roughly in your hair and grabbing your hip tightly.

'Daryl, we shouldn't...' you begin as he pulls away momentarily, but your body continues without your conscience.

'Shut up,' Daryl growls in his deep, gruff voice, grabbing the backs of your thighs and lifting you up against him. He wraps your legs around his waist before slamming you hard against the wall, crushing his body into yours.

You can feel the hard bulge of his excitement pressing against the thin material of your panties. You gasp as he rocks his hips into yours, nipping and sucking at your neck and across your collarbone before trailing his way up to your ear, flicking his tongue across your sensitive flesh and biting hungrily at your earlobe with a soft, guttural moan that sends shivers to your core.

'I've wanted you since you first stepped in this room,' he murmurs in your ear, trailing kisses up and down your neck. 'I watched you teachin' those people how to throw knives. I heard how you pushed my bike to the fuckin' limits when Jesus brought you here. Then when I saw you lyin' out there in the open, not scared of a fuckin' thing...'

Before you have time to register, Daryl throws you onto his bed, crushing his lips onto yours with a hunger and desperation that lights a fire inside you. The sounds of your heavy breaths fills the air as he shrugs the jacket from his shoulders and you impatiently tug his shirt over his head. You stare at each other for a moment, panting as you drink in the sight of his muscular body baring over you.

Unable to wait, you grab the back of Daryl's neck and pull him into you. He grunts when you tug roughly on his hair, biting his lower lip. Your other hand skims down his torso to his belt. His hands are rough and desperate on your body, one coming up to wrap around the base of your throat and the other sliding up beneath your top and grabbing hungrily at your breast. You gasp and shiver as he runs his thumb lightly over the top of your hard nipple before pinching it gently. 

'Daryl...' you moan as his lips trace across your jawline and explore your neck with hot, wet kisses. 

'Daryl, this is wrong...' you try to whisper, but his hand tightens around your throat, restricting your airways just enough to stop you from talking. Your breath comes in short, sharp gasps beneath his grip and your head begins to spin slightly.

'Do you want this?' Daryl growls in your ear, gently caressing your breast and releasing his hold on your throat enough to let you answer.

'Yes, but don't you think...' You're stopped again by Daryl tightening his hand back around your throat while the other unhooks his belt.

'Stop thinkin' Y/N,' he whispers against your skin, dipping down to your abdomen, his tongue tracing lightly along the sensitive flesh just above your panties.

You gasp as you feel his teeth nipping gently at your skin before taking the material between his teeth and dragging it slowly down your legs. Releasing his hand from your neck, your head rushes at the sudden wave of oxygen flooding to it. Daryl moans hungrily against your skin, sucking and licking his way tantalisingly slowly up the inside of your thighs. Your breathing quickens and your heart pounds. He grabs your thighs in his rough hands, forcing them apart before sliding underneath you to grasp at your ass, digging his fingernails in slightly as he palms your flesh.

He looks up at you and meets your eyes, the lust burning in his gaze sends an ache to your core. His lips curve up in a mischievous smile before they are suddenly wrapped around your clit, sucking and flicking his tongue across it in rhythmic circles. You cry out, Daryl's sudden attack setting your nerves on fire. Entwining one hand in his hair and gripping the sheets with the other, your body is wracked by waves of heat and tension rushing to your centre.

Daryl teases your entrance with his finger while his other hand reaches up to grope at your breasts, pinching your nipples just hard enough to make you whimper. You arch your hips up into him, urging him to push inside you as he traces circles around your entrance in rhythm with his tongue on your clit.

'Please,' you beg him, desperate to be filled when your walls start to convulse at the pleasure mounting in your clit.

'Please what?' He growls, licking his lips as he looks up at you from between your thighs.

'Please Daryl...' you moan desperately, your hips bucking.

But Daryl grabs your hip tightly and pins you down, his finger nails digging in, making you let out another whimper. He grins satisfyingly at the noise. He kisses his way slowly up your stomach and over your breasts, his finger still teasing your entrance but refusing to give you what you want.

'Tell me what you want... exactly what you want,' he says in a low growl, the vibrations in his chest reverberating through your body, pressing himself into you. Pushing his hips between your thighs, you can feel his bulge pressing against your core. But the material of his pants is in the way and you groan, desperate to feel him.

'I want you...' you whimper, trailing your hand down his body to his crotch and palming his erection beneath the material.

He moans, his lips trailing their way to your nipple. His tongue swirls around it teasingly before taking it into his mouth, sucking on it gently and sending spikes of pleasure rushing through you. You manage to unzip his pants and slide your hand slowly beneath his boxers, tracing a finger lightly down his impressive length before wrapping your hand around him.

He lets out another deep moan as you begin to slowly stroke him while you explore the taut muscles of his back. Daryl moves his attention to your other breast, nipping gently at your hard nipple and making you gasp, flicking his tongue across the sensitive flesh and sucking on it while his rough hand caresses the other.

'Please Daryl,' you moan, his teasing at your entrance becoming almost unbearable.

You rock you hips into his, desperate to feel some friction on your clit again, but he pushes you back down into the bed. He leans over you until his lips are at your ear, his hot breath raising tingling goosebumps over your skin.

'I said tell me,' he growls, removing his finger from your entrance and wrapping it around your throat.

'I need you...' you whine breathlessly, trying to turn your head to reach his lips. 

But he pushes his hand up to grab your jaw, turning your head away from him and blowing gently on your skin, his lips just lightly brushing down your neck but not kissing you.

'Need me how?' He whispers, his free hand tracing lines up and down your sides with one finger, lighting your skin on fire.

'I need you... inside me,' you whimper, squeezing your eyes shut. A blush creeps up your cheeks, feeling utterly powerless against his strength and his teases. 'Please Daryl...'

Before you know it, he's gone. Cool air washes over you like ice as the heat of his body leaves you. You open your eyes and look up to see him standing by the bed and leaning over you, stripping his pants and boxers from his body. Your eyes widen when his impressive erection springs free, the tip glistening with precum as he bears down over you.

'Get on you hands and knees,' he orders in his deep, gruff voice.

You obey without question, your heart pounding and your head spinning when you realise what is about to happen. All thoughts of Rick or Negan are far from your mind as you feel Daryl's rough hands grabbing your hips and yanking you towards him, your feet dangling off the end of the bed.

You gasp as you feel the tip of his cock prod gently against your entrance. Daryl kicks your legs wider with his knees before reaching around with to press a finger against your clit, keeping a tight hold on your hip. You moan when he slowly slides inside you, savouring the sensation as inch by inch he fills you up, stretching your walls. He lets out a low, animalistic grunt, pushing all the way to the base of his cock. For a moment he remains still inside you, allowing your muscles to adapt to his size while his finger rubs slowly over your clit.

'Please Daryl...' you breathe, trying to rock your hips but unable to move against the strength of his grip. 'Please fuck me!'

Daryl laughs softly, pulling agonisingly slowly out of you, all the way to the tip. 

'Anything for you, darlin',' he growls before slamming himself into you with a force that makes you cry out and jerk forwards.

He readjusts his hold on your hip and circles his finger faster over your clit, making you moan and gasp as you feel the heat building inside of you. He pulls out of you again, still slowly. You bite your lip, desperately trying to hold off your release until you can no longer take it. He slams back into you, groaning loudly. Then as though he can't restrain himself any longer, he's suddenly fucking you fast, each thrust getting harder and harder, your moans and cries filling the air alongside the sound of his hips smacking against your ass.

The rhythm of his finger on your clit matches the pace of his thrusts and your head spins as the heat builds and builds in your core, threatening to overpower you. You muster all of your strength to hold off the climax your body is screaming for.

'Daryl!' You cry as his thrusts grow quicker and quicker.

His animalistic moans and grunts turn you on so much that it takes everything you have to resist your release. He lets go of your clit and moves his hand to grab your breasts, pinching your nipples and sending waves of shock and pleasure through your body. You whimper and scream while he slams your hips into him to meet his thrusts, his cock rubbing against your G-spot and making you cry out.

'Oh Daryl, I'm gonna cum!' You wail. Your walls start to convulse, unable to hold back any longer.

'Cum with me!' Daryl moans, thrusting deep inside you as your walls spasm around him.

He grunts, his cock throbbing inside you and the warmth of his release filling you. After a moment he pulls away and your knees give way beneath you. You fall to the bed in a heap, panting and sweating, the waves of your release still washing over you.

Your body feels pleasantly heavy and you smile as you watch Daryl pull on his boxers and lay down beside you. He hooks an arm around your shoulders, moving your head gently to rest on his chest. Neither of you speak, losing yourselves in the moment. Your breathing evens out and your heart rates steadily slow. Neither of you mention Rick, or Negan, or the danger that haunts you both. You simply lay in each others arms until sleep takes you.


	18. Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At the turn of the tides your entire world stands on the edge of a knife, Rick and Daryl's lives hanging in the balance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as ever for the lovely feedback, always makes my day to read! Everything goes down in this chapter but it's far from the end! Hope you enjoy :)

A sharp knock at the door has you shooting bolt upright. You look over to Daryl to see him already disentangling himself from the sheets.

'Who is it?' He calls, hastily pulling on his shirt and pants.

'It's Maggie. You need to see this.'

Daryl meets your eyes, reflecting the same fear that suddenly pumps your body into action. You get dressed and grab your knife, tucking it into your belt as Daryl grabs his crossbow. The sunlight burns your eyes when Daryl throws open the door. 

You both head out, prepared for whatever fight is coming, or to run to the sewers at a moment's notice. The entire population of Hilltop stands gathered by the open gate beside several cars that are ready to leave. Maggie and Jesus approach you with expressions that turn your blood cold.

'What is it?' Daryl says in his low, gruff voice, automatically scanning his surroundings for sign of a threat. Maggie silently hands him something. A poor-resolution, black-and-white photograph...

You stand beside Daryl to get a better look and see that the photo is of one of the houses in Alexandria... your house in fact. Sitting on the steps of the front porch is a man, but you can barely make him out. In the corner of the photograph are three words written in red: _'Come and play x'_

Daryl hands it to you without a word. When you take a closer look your stomach turns to ice and your body seems to freeze in place. You recognise that long, wavy hair, that beard, that posture... It's Rick.

'We've got to go. Now,' you mutter quietly, handing the picture back to Maggie without looking at her.

It's as though the world had gone into free-fall; you're floating helplessly in mid-air, your body frozen and limp as terror courses through you like poison in your veins. Somewhere in your peripheral you see Daryl nod to Maggie and turn to you. He's saying something but you can't hear anything over the muffled ringing in your ears.

'Y/N!' He shouts, grabbing your face with both hands and snapping you back to reality. This horrible, petrifying reality.

His soft blue eyes meet yours and something unspoken passes between you. An understanding. Both of you will do anything to save Rick, anything it takes. You know what has to be done, but for now it has to remain between you, or else Maggie would never let you go.

'Let's get him back.'

You take a deep breath, swallow and nod, your mind focusing only on the task ahead. Determination stifles your fear as you turn now to Maggie and Jesus.

'Daryl and I will go on the bike and take a short-cut off-road, approaching Alexandria from the back. There's a tree with plenty of cover that hangs over the fence just beside the roof of one of the houses — we can sneak in from there. We'll keep hidden and only come out if things kick off,' you intone monotonously, locking your emotions away so that your practical mind can take control.

You glance at Daryl out of the corner of your eye, knowing that neither of you have any intentions of staying hidden. You are the targets. No one else.

'Good,' Maggie nods. You can see Jesus watching you suspiciously, but you avoid his eye. 'We'll head off first, take as many of us that can fight an' draw 'em out to the front. You wait behind the fence at the back 'til Jesus comes to give you the all clear. Unless, like you say, it all... kicks off. Okay?'

You and Daryl murmur your agreement and head straight to his bike waiting at the front gate. Avoiding the stares of the Hilltop residents, you hop straight on the bike first and rev it into action.

'Can I ride?' You ask, looking up at Daryl. He considers you for a moment, understanding without asking why you need to feel in control right now.

'Sure kid,' he growls, leaning down to you to stroke his finger gently across your cheek. He plants a soft kiss on your forehead before sliding in behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist.

'Thank you,' you murmur in a low voice, just loud enough for only him to hear.

You lean your head back into his shoulder and he squeezes you tightly. For a moment you wish could span a lifetime, you sit there close to one another, the reality of what you must do sinking in. Quickly wiping away a stray tear, you tear off out of the gates, unable to hear Maggie and Jesus screaming after you over the deafening roar of the bike. If you put your foot down, you and Daryl should easily reach Alexandria's gate before the rest could catch up and try to stop you.

A thousand scenarios flash before your mind as the road speeds away beneath you. Rick must be alive, that you know for sure. What state you'll find him in is a different matter, however. Negan only killed when it's absolutely necessary and he made every kill a statement. He wouldn't want to waste Rick's death without a spectacle. But you also know that Negan could be bargained with, and that's the hope you hold on to as you turn a corner and the walls of Alexandria come into view.

'They're pretty far behind us, we should have Rick safe by the time they show up!' Daryl shouts from behind you as you slow up on your approach to the gate.

You park the bike directly in front and both hop off, standing side-by-side with your weapons hanging loosely by your sides. You won't be using them this time. You step forward, opening your mouth to call for Negan, but Daryl grabs your arm and yanks you back.

'You ain't goin' in,' he whispers anxiously, steering you away towards the trees.

'What?!' You hiss, trying to free your arm. Daryl's grip is like a vice as he half carries you behind a large oak.

'I won't let him have you. I'll exchange myself for Rick and then you can run. Far away from here,' he utters, grabbing your jaw with his free hand and pulling you into a fierce kiss that leaves you breathless and aching for more.

Meeting his gaze for what you expect will be the last time, you give him a small smile and try to fight the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks. The night you'd shared together seems like a distant dream now. He gives your hand a final squeeze before heading to the gate and banging his fist on it three times.

'I've come to play, you sick son-of-a-bitch!' He yells.

You have no choice but to watch from your hiding spot. You have your knife... maybe you could catch Negan by surprise when his back is turned, provided you're quick enough...

The gates grate open and a horrifying scene awaits you. What looks to be the entire population of Alexandria is on their knees, gagged with their arms bound behind their backs and guns pointing to each of their heads. They form a semi-circle behind the centre-piece of the show: Rick, kneeling on the floor and barely conscious. Blood streams from a wound on his temple and trickles from his mouth, his face purple and swollen. Negan stands casually beside him.

'Well if it ain't my lost lil' puppy come home to Daddy at last!' Negan cries, thrusting his hips forwards and swinging Lucille playfully by his side. You're relieved to see her clean of blood for now.

'I ain't here for you,' Daryl growls in a low, threatening voice, his hand twitching on his crossbow. 

A shit-eating grin spreads beneath Negan's trimmed, salt-and-pepper beard as he eyes Daryl. After a moment of silence he motions to someone you can't see. From behind the wall approaches Dwight, gun pointing at Daryl's head. He confiscates his crossbow before retreating amongst the other Saviors. Blood boils in your veins and your vision turns to red as the depth of Dwight's betrayal crashes over you.

'_Everyone's_ here for me. All these people here _are_ _me_,' Negan crows.

The whole town is utterly silent. Even the trees and the air seem to have gone still, hanging on to his every word.

'That's what _you _can't seem to understand!' He shouts, closing the gap between him and Daryl and raising Lucille to point directly at Daryl's chest.

'Leave him alone!' You cry, sprinting out from behind the tree and throwing yourself between them.

'Well jus' _look who it is_,' Negan grins, tracing his tongue along his lower lip and tilting his head to the side as he mercifully lowers Lucille.

Your breathing is quick and your heart hammers loudly in your ears. But you meet his gaze with all the loathing you can muster.

'I've missed you especially, darlin'. Hell, my dick is fuckin' _achin' _already!' He drools, stepping towards you so that his face is just inches from yours. His eyes wander down to your mouth, biting his lip with a low, gravelly moan.

Daryl suddenly yanks you behind him and pushes right up into Negan's face until they are nose-to-nose.

'You leave her the fuck alone. You got that, you piece o' shit?' He growls menacingly. 

Negan doesn't even recoil, but looks back at him with a hard and terrifying expression on his face, his smile vanishing to be replaced with a murderous look.

'What did you say to me?' He says quietly, tightening his grip on Lucille.

'She's not part o' the deal.'

The two of them glare at each other for a moment that seems to stretch on forever. Your heart pounds in your throat and you feel like you might be sick, but you know what you came here to do. You have to save them both.

'An' what deal is that?' Negan breathes.

'I'll come back with you,' you interrupt loudly, drawing both their attention to you.

'No!' Daryl shouts, punching Negan square in the jaw and sending him stumbling backwards. 

Before he can pull his arm back for another hit, three sets of arms are wrestling him to the ground, beating and kicking him.

'Stop! Stop it! Please!' You scream, trying to pull them off of him. But Negan's suddenly behind you, grabbing your hair and yanking you backwards. You yelp in pain.

'Put him next to Rick!' He orders.

The men comply, dragging Daryl up onto his knees beside Rick and tying his hands behind his back. You look helplessly at them both and the pain in your heart squeezes tears from your eyes. You swallow your sobs. You came here to save them, and that's exactly what you're going to do.

'We're going to play a lil' game, just the four o' us,' Negan growls in your ear from behind you, his lips brushing lightly against your neck and making you shiver.

When he releases you, you remain rooted to the spot. Terror courses through you at the thought of what you must do, but the sight of Rick and Daryl on their knees before you, beaten to a pulp because of you, only hardens your resolve.

'This is one of my favourites: Truth or Dare. Only... I've changed the rules slightly, jus' to make it a lil' more interesting!' Negan grins playfully, pacing slowly between you, Rick and Daryl, Lucille resting on his shoulder as he turns to them. 'If you lie, or fail to do the dare, I'll kill one of these poor, innocent people behind you,' he gestures Lucille to the Alexandrians.

'You sick fuck,' Daryl grunts, spitting on the floor at Negan's feet. Negan laughs and a shiver runs down your spine at the sound.

'You can go first then,' he says coldly, crouching down in front of Daryl. 'I'm gonna start with truth. Did Rick here sleep with my girl when I let her stay at this shithole the other night?'

Your insides freeze at his words. Negan must already know. Whatever they say, someone will die and it will be your fault. If they lie, it could be any one of these people who had nothing to do with this. If they tell the truth, it will be them.

Daryl doesn't answer.

'C'mon now. I'm a patient man but I ain't got time to waste on your sorry fuckin' ass today,' Negan growls, resting Lucille on Daryl's shoulder.

'No, she didn't sleep with Rick,' Daryl mutters.

Negan lets out a low chuckle and gets to his feet, wandering slowly along the line of Alexandrians with Lucille hanging loosely by his side. Each person shrinks in his wake. A blonde man squeezes his eyes shut as he approaches, then breathes a sigh of relief when he passes him. 

'Wrong!' He chimes, turning on the spot and bringing Lucille crashing down onto the blonde man's skull. The woman beside him cries out in agony.

He buckles to the floor and in four more sickening crunches his head is reduced to a spattering of blood and gore across the ground, the woman shrinking in on herself as she succumbs to her pain. Her sobs, muffled by the gag in her mouth, echo across the silent square. No one dares to breathe. Even Daryl is silent as he meets your terrified gaze. He shakes his head ever so slightly at you, eyes full of pain and pleading, guessing your plan.

'Prick, your turn!' Negan comes to crouch in front of Rick, grabbing his hair and pulling his face up to meet him. He's barely even conscious.

'Did you sleep with my girl?'

Negan yanks harder on his hair and Rick groans. He nods. Negan stares at him for a moment, a terrible grin forming across his face as he traces his tongue along his lower lip. Releasing him, he stands up slowly and turns to face you, his face suddenly murderous.

'Truth or dare?' He asks you in barely more than a whisper. You take a deep breath and stare determinedly back at him as you answer in a clear voice.

'Dare.'

Negan laughs, his smile not reaching his eyes. 'Okay darlin', I dare you to tell me the truth: did you sleep with Rick here when I so kindly let you stay for a night after you begged me so... sexily?'

You see Rick look blearily up at you and Daryl wrenching desperately against his bonds. Then you look directly into Negan's eyes and answer.

'Yes.'

'She never slept with Rick!' Daryl suddenly shouts. You stare at him in horror. This wasn't part of your plan. 'It was me!'

Negan's face splits into a wide grin and he throws his head back in a booming laugh.

'Well doll, ain't you a fuckin' heart-breaker!' He cries. 'See, I _know _you fucked Rick 'cos ol' Dwight told me he saw the two of you together on the mornin' I returned here to get you.' 

Daryl's head drops and Rick squeezes his eyes shut. Dwight had been playing them all along. 

'Which means if _he's _tellin' the truth,' Negan continues in a voice suddenly filled with rage, pointing Lucille just inches away from Daryl's head. 'That means you must o' slept with him _too_, right after your lil' escape attempt.'

'Negan please! I beg you!' You cry desperately. Negan turns his back on you and paces slowly before Rick and Daryl, ignoring your pleas.

'Eenie. Meenie. Miney. Mo,' he counts, pointing to each of them in turn.

'Please! Don't hurt them! I'll do anything!' You beg, unable to move. Tears flow freely down your cheeks.

'Catch. A tiger. By. Its toe.'

Rick and Daryl both meet your eyes, begging you to accept this and to live, silently and desperately pleading with you not to take their place. You shake your head. They both cry out just as you open your mouth to offer your life as forfeit.

'I'll marry you, Negan,' you say quietly, but your voice seems to ring across the entire square, echoing on forever.

Negan stops in his tracks, his back still turned. Your heart pounds as though it was trying to escape your chest. Tears roll relentlessly down your cheeks and a cold emptiness spreads through you. 


	19. Set

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the events in Alexandria comes crashing down over you, culminating in a terrible choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, been quite ill but back now! Thank you for the comments!!! Hope you enjoy! :D

A low chuckle rumbles in Negan's chest as he slowly lowers Lucille. You can't breathe. Rick and Daryl are screaming for you to run. To kill him. To do anything but the only thing you know will save them both: to give Negan what he wants most.

'Say that again,' he mutters, his back to you. You steady your breathing and mould your face into an empty expression.

'I'll marry you.'

'Hmm,' he hums, turning slowly around to look at you but not retreating from Rick and Daryl struggling against their bonds. 

Locking you in his gaze, he lands his boot in Rick's gut. Rick buckles, choking and spluttering. You keep your face expressionless, Negan watching your reaction.

'Say. It. Again,' he growls, his face hard.

'I-I'll marry you,' you repeat, keeping your gaze fixed on Negan and trying desperately to block out the agonising sounds of Rick's pain.

This time his boot meets Daryl's face with a sharp crunch followed by a sickening groan as Daryl falls backwards onto the floor, his arms trapped behind his back and blood gushing from his nose and mouth. He heaves himself back onto his knees and spits out a tooth, staring daggers at Negan but falling silent.

You know he's testing you and although your insides are screaming at you to plunge your knife into his skull, you take it from your belt and throw it to the floor at Negan's feet. He glances down at it and a small smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. His tongue tracing over his lower lip, he looks up at you again, eyes alight with desire. You suppress a shudder and stare resolutely back.

'I assume you'd like me to spare them in return?' He asks in a disturbingly calm voice, as though you were haggling over the price of a car.

You nod once, resisting Daryl's eyes burning into you, silently calling for you to stop. Negan considers you for a moment, rubbing his jaw. He nods his agreement, then he turns to Dwight.

'Put Daryl in the back of the truck and don't take your eyes off him for a single fuckin' moment,' he orders.

'You liar! You said you'd spare him!' You cry, leaping forwards and grabbing Negan's jacket with both hands in desperation. 

This was the only card you had and it _had_ to be enough. It just had to. Negan stares down at you with a murderous look, but you don't recoil. 

'Please! Is it not enough?' You beg. 

'Don't you fuckin' _dare_ call me a liar,' he growls in a dangerous tone, nostrils flaring. A terrible rage consumes his expression, a rage you'd never seen before, terrifying you to your bones. And pain, an unmistakable pain burns behind his eyes. Releasing your grip, you take several steps backwards, shocked into silence.

'Now Rick, it seems despite my better judgement I'm honour-bound to let you go,' he says, resuming his charismatic tone and crouching down in front of Rick's diminished form. 'Cut him loose, and the others too,' he orders the Saviors behind him.

The watching crowd are set free but they're too terrified to get to their feet. A mean-looking woman with a shaved head comes to untie Rick, who looks up at Negan with pure hatred in his eyes.

'I'm gonna kill you,' he murmurs, his face inches from Negan's. 'Not today. Not tomorrow. But one day... I'm gonna kill you.'

A shit-eating grin spreads across Negan's face. He gets slowly to his feet, picking your knife up from the floor. Crossing over to you in two quick strides, Negan swipes the blade across your upper arm. Blood spurts across Negan's face and you shout in pain, tripping backwards.

'No!' Rick yells, stumbling to his feet and lunging for Negan.

'No, don't!' You cry, rushing forwards and blocking his way. 

You meet Rick's eyes, pain reflecting in both of your faces. _'Save me,'_ you mouth silently to him before Negan yanks you back by your injured arm. Stopping in his tracks, Rick's expression crumbles as he watches you wince in agony under Negan's grip.

'Listen fuckin' carefully, Prick,' he booms for the whole crowd to hear. 'This is how it's gonna be: every time you step even a toe outta line, I'll slice her pretty fuckin' skin open like a knife through hot butter. You have a week, an' if you don't have somethin' pretty fuckin' special to show me after the stunt you pulled today, you'll see how fuckin' angry I can get.'

* * *

It's like you'd never left. Sitting hunched against the cold stone wall, gripping your swollen arm still oozing blood. You're too empty even for tears. You had saved them both, but you'd also lost. You close your eyes against the crushing darkness. Negan had won.

Then you hear an odd sound coming from in front of you. Through the infinitesimally small gap beneath the door slides something that sounds like paper. Blindly groping around, heart hammering in your chest, your bloody fingers wrap around a small scrap of paper. A message? 

There's not an slither of light to read it by. Just as you're about to curse your anonymous messenger's idiocy, you feel slight indentations in the paper. Flattening it out on the floor, you carefully trace the tip of your finger over the indentations, almost screaming in triumph as you make out letters. One by one you spell out the stranger's message:

_ILL SAVE YOU D_

Your mind races. D? Could that be a signature? D for Daryl... Had Daryl already managed to escape and get a note to you telling you he's coming back for you? D... you can't think who else it could be. But how could he have done it? You've only been here for a few hours, dumped here by a sneering Simon after Negan had released you into his clutches with nothing more than a shit-eating grin and a murmured _'I'll be seein' you soon, doll,'_ in your ear as you'd watched his men haul Daryl's beaten body into the back of the truck, Dwight dragging him by the hair while Rick stood helplessly by, his eyes fixed on you.

_Bang. Bang. Bang._

The echoing sound of wood on metal rings in your ears. A voice that makes your stomach drop drifts through from the other side of the door.

'How we doin' in there, darlin'? Nice n' cosy?'

You hastily scrunch up the note and shove it deep into your pocket, scrambling to your feet just as the door opens with a deafening scrape. The towering silhouette of a man with a baseball bat resting on his shoulder sends your heart to a frenzied panic. But you use the adrenaline to fuel your anger as your eyes adjust to the light and Negan's rugged features swim into view.

'Oh honey, ain't you a sight for sore eyes,' he drools in a deep, husky voice, his hazel eyes roaming unashamedly over your body.

'Fuck you,' you mutter through gritted teeth, spitting on the floor at his feet just as Daryl had done earlier.

You no longer care what happens to you, but you refuse to play along with him anymore. You might have to marry him, but you didn't have to like him. With any luck, Negan might kill you anyway for your trouble. But then you think of Rick and Daryl, and how nothing would be there to protect them if you were gone and the deal no longer stood. 

Negan steps towards you, towering above you and looking down with heavy-lidded eyes, his face less than inch away from yours. Tracing his lips with his tongue, he lets out a long sigh.

'Now this ain't the way I wanted things to go down between us, darlin',' he murmurs in a low voice. You stare resolutely back at him, fire burning in your eyes. 'I'm in a generous mood today, but I'm also fuckin' _pissed_ with you an' that lil' fuckboy friends o' yours. So I'll give you a choice. But if you don't fuckin' _pick one_ — apparently that's fuckin' hard for you — I'll kill 'em both and leave you in a room with their walker asses. You got that?'

You nod once, keeping your face void of the fear threatening to break your composure and allowing your anger to rise like acid in your throat. Negan's eyes narrow and his lips purse into a hard line, sensing the strength of your defiance. A gloved hand suddenly grabs your jaw, pushing your face up so that your lips are almost brushing against his as Negan pushes you backwards into the wall.

'Here's your choice, darlin': option A, you come with me and we pick up where we left off. I'll marry you and you'll live in fuckin' luxury with the rest o' my wives. Option B, I'll shove you into the cell with Daryl.'

Your eyes widen, hope foolishly rushing through you. Negan grins, biting his lip as he watches it form in your eyes.

'But I'm still gonna marry you. When I wanna relieve my fuckin' achin' balls, I'll come get you and then when you return you'll have to look into Daryl's big blue eyes as my cum drips down your fuckin' legs,' he finishes with a malevolent smile. 

Your blood turns to ice in your veins. 

'Which'll it be, darlin'?' 


	20. Match

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You make your choice, you discover the identity of the secret messenger, and you share in a moment with Daryl before everything changes.

'Put me in the cell with Daryl,' you hiss through gritted teeth, staring straight into Negan's arrogant, hazel eyes.

He cocks his head to one side, tracing his tongue along his lower lip before sucking it between his teeth, his eyes burning into yours. He lets out a long, deep sigh. You can feel the vibrations in his chest rattle through your body as Negan pushes himself closer into you.

'Now that is a fuckin' shame, doll,' he growls in his low gravelly voice. He lowers his face to yours, his nose lightly grazing across your cheek, so close that his lips brush against yours when he speaks. 'But we can still have some fun together...'

You squeeze your eyes tightly shut and feel your body freeze into a statue as Negan takes your upper lip gently between his. His trimmed beard tickles your skin and he breathes in deeply. He moves his gloved hand from your jaw around to the back of your head, gripping your hair tightly. Yet his kiss remains uncharacteristically gentle. When he finally pulls away you're left breathless, realising that you'd been holding your breath. You stare hatefully back at his smug expression, a devilish grin painting across his face.

'Dee! Get your ass in here,' Negan suddenly shouts, his face still inches from yours and your hair still in his fist.

Your mind races. D? Like the D in the note? Is your potential rescuer one of Negan's men? You hear a man's footsteps enter the cell but Negan's face is so close to yours that you can't see past him.

'Put her in with Daryl. Break him, but don't hurt her. She belongs to me.'

'Yes, sir,' comes a soft voice you recognise.

Negan gives you a wink and releases you.

'An' if she gives you any shit jus' send her my way an' I'll fuckin' deal with her,' he growls, sauntering past the silhouette of the man who's come to take you. Negan disappears down the corridor whistling a tune to himself.

You remain rooted to the spot, a small, pointless act of defiance that nonetheless fuels your anger. Then the man comes into view as your eyes adjust, and your jaw drops.

'Hey,' Dwight says simply. His face expressionless but his eyes burn into yours, trying to convey everything he can't say aloud.

'_You_,' you hiss, stepping forwards ready to lunge for him. He raises a gun to your chest, the cold barrel touching your skin. 'You traitorous _bastard_,' you spit.

'Where's the note?' He whispers almost inaudibly. You stare at him blankly. Dee short for Dwight. How had you not heard him called that before?

'So it was you?' You mouth silently. 

He gives the tiniest nod. You continue to stare, trying to make sense of it all in your head. He'd been the one who'd betrayed you and Rick to Negan. What game was he playing? _Who _was he playing?

'Hurry up. If he finds it on you we're both dead,' he breathes. 

After a split second's deliberation you reach into your pocket and surreptitiously hand him the scrunched up note, which he quickly pockets.

'Move,' he orders suddenly loudly, grabbing your uninjured arm and tugging you towards the door.

Holding the gun to your head, Dwight marches you through a maze of corridors each lined with featureless doors, making it impossible for you to keep track of your direction. You walk together in silence, images of Daryl's beaten and bloody body temporarily pushing out the shock of Dwight being your secret messenger. With each flight of stairs you descend your anxiety builds. You just want to run to Daryl and see that he's okay, terrified of what state you're going to find him in.

Eventually Dwight stops you outside a heavy metal door. A large speaker is plugged into the wall just outside beside an old-fashioned oil-lamp. Dwight turns to you, putting his gun into his pant and placing a gentle hand on your shoulder

'I'm sorry,' he whispers.

Before you have a chance to reply, he's heaving open the heavy metal door. The cell is even smaller than the one you were in before. In one corner sits a bucket, and in the other lies Daryl, unconscious, his face covered in blood and swollen almost beyond recognition. You run to him without thinking, sitting on the floor beside him and lifting his hand onto your lap, brushing his bloody, matted hair away from his face. Dwight clears his throat, drawing your attention back to him momentarily.

'Here,' he murmurs, pulling a small loaf of bread from beneath his jacket and placing it along with the the oil-lamp beside you. He crouches down to light it with a cigarette lighter.

He looks at you for a moment and you nod your thanks. You don't trust him for a second, but this small act of kindness reminds you of the comfort his presence brought you the last time you were in Negan's clutches.

Dwight returns your nod and just as he stands up to leave he says in a low voice, 'I'll give you tonight.'

Then he shuts the door behind him, leaving you in near-darkness with an unconscious Daryl.

* * *

The soft glow of the oil-lamp throws Daryl's bruises into sharp relief. You wish there was something you could use to at least clean the blood from his face, but you're afraid that touching him would only cause him more pain. There's a substantial amount of dried blood from a wound on his temple, but it had at least stopped bleeding. Gently placing your hand on his forehead you're relieved to find he doesn't have a fever. For a moment you think you see his eyelids flutter a little, but he doesn't stir.

As slowly and carefully as you can, you lift Daryl up, making sure to support his head. You shift yourself so that you sit with your back against the wall and your legs on either side of his shoulders, resting his head gently back in your lap. Reaching for the bread, you tear off a small chunk and stuff it hungrily into your mouth, trying hard to resist the temptation to finish it. With no telling when either of you would next see food, you know you'll have to make it last as long as you can.

The adrenaline gradually drains from your body and exhaustion begins to creep over you in its place. But you're determined to stay awake until Daryl comes round, to make sure that he's okay. You're also desperate to tell him about Dwight's note. You'd heard that Daryl had been in here before under Dwight's close guard, so he should know better than anyone whether or not he could be trusted.

Resting your head against the hard stone wall, you allow your mind to wander back to memories of before the world turned ugly. Absentmindedly stroking Daryl's hair, you find yourself humming a song you used to sing to your little nephew to get him to go to sleep whenever you babysat him. You sing it softly to yourself, caught up in the memories as tears roll mutely down your cheeks.

_'Someone like you_

_Isn't meant to be defined,_

_Or confined,_

_Or even met eye to eye._

_Just there to be explored_

_And then all the while adored_

_Someone like you,_

_Someone like you.'_

You don't notice Daryl shift imperceptibly in your lap, listening to you.

_'_ _Someone like you_

_Is so beautifully designed,_

_From the hands_

_All the way to the mind._

_Just there to be explored_

_And then all the while adored_

_Someone like you,_

_Someone like you.'_

You close your eyes as that small memory of your old life momentarily drowns you in despair, tears flooding down your cheeks. You try to suppress the sobs so your shaking wouldn't disturb Daryl.

'Don't stop,' Daryl murmurs from your lap. 

Your eyes fly open and you look down at him, but his eyes are closed and his breathing is slow and heavy. This isn't a moment you want to end; somehow you know it will never be like this again. Taking a deep breath to stay your tears, you sing for him. And for a short while it's like you are the only two people in the world.

_'They say that home is where the heart is;_

_I guess I haven't found my home._

_And we keep driving round in circles,_

_Afraid to call this place our own._

_And are we there yet?'_

Daryl lets out a quiet sigh, shifting himself onto his side and taking your hand to rest his cheek against your palm, his hand beneath yours.

_'They say there's linings made of silver_

_Folded inside each raining cloud._

_Well, we need someone to deliver_

_Our silver lining now._

_And are we there yet?_

_Home, home, home.'_

He rests his other hand on your thigh, tracing soft, slow circles in time with your strokes of his hair.

_They say you're really not somebody_

_Until somebody else loves you._

_Well, I am waiting to make somebody somebody soon._

_And are we there yet?_

_Home, home, home.'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First song is Paolo Nutini's 'Someone Like You'  
Second song is Ingrid Michaelson's 'Are We There Yet?'


	21. Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your one night of solitude with Daryl has come to an end and now you must face up to the reality you have no choice but to accept if you are to keep Daryl and Rick safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kind responses, I hope you enjoy this next one :D Things are due to get pretty intense!

'What happens now, Daryl?' You murmur tiredly, not wanting to lose a single second of this night with him before Negan unleashes whatever he has in store for the two of you.

'We wait,' he says gruffly, raising himself up and grunting in pain.

'Anything broken?' You ask, trying to keep the concern out of your voice, knowing that he's not one to want anyone to make a fuss over him.

'Don't think so. Don't worry 'bout me though, how's your arm?' He growls, bringing himself up to sit next to you. The cell is so small that you're squashed together, only just able to stretch your legs out straight. 'Lemme take a look at it.'

'It's fine, honestly,' you reassure him, but you wince as he lifts your arm to examine the wound just below your shoulder. When he brings the oil-lamp closer to his face you have to stifle a gasp. 

'That bad, huh?' Daryl chuckles softly, running his finger lightly around the edge of the cut.

'No, I didn't mean...' you say quickly, wincing at Daryl's touch. 'Just tell me you're okay. Please?'

Daryl meets your concerned gaze and sighs, placing the oil-lamp back on the floor and wrapping his arm around your shoulders, careful not to knock your injury. You rest your head on his shoulder and he plants a gently kiss on your forehead before reaching for the bread and tearing off a chunk, handing half of it to you.

'No thanks, I already had some,' you say.

'Take it. You gotta keep up your strength 'n heal,' he growls softly.

'We need to make it last. Dwight said he'd give us tonight,' you can feel Daryl stiffen at the mention of his name. 'But after that we don't know when we'll next get to eat.'

'You need it. Besides, Negan won't let you starve now you're gonna be his wife,' he replies quietly, his voice monotonous.

'I had no choice,' you whisper, your eyes stinging with tears again.

'You coulda run,' Daryl intones, the hand resting in his lap balling up into a fist.

'Then you would be dead! And so would Rick!' You cry, pulling away from him to look him in his beaten-up face. 'It's all my fault, Daryl, don't you get it? The only way to save you both was to give Negan what he's wanted all along. I never should have run away from him in the first place, I never should have dragged you into this! I shouldn't have even met you!'

You sob in earnest now, burying your face in your hands as the truth of your blame for this entire situation crushes you into a pitiful mess.

'I've put everyone I care about in danger just because Rick was kind enough to take me in. He should have left me in those fucking woods to bleed out and get eaten by walkers, then you'd all be safe,' you weep.

'_Negan_ did those things, Y/N,' Daryl says firmly, tugging your hands away from your face and wrapping them in his rough palms. 'We wouldn't be any safer from him if you'd never bin found. Rick's workin' on a plan to destroy Negan 'n the Saviors _because _o' you. You've brought the fight back to him, back to all o' us...'

'And now you're all in even more danger than before - do you really think you stand a chance against him? He outguns us 10-1. You'd be a fool for thinking he won't just kill us all! I can't let that hap—' Daryl silences you with a finger pressed against your lips.

He leans his ear towards the door, listening carefully. All you hear is silence. You're just about to ask him what's going on when you hear it, coming from somewhere down the corridor. The whistling. Two notes repeated, exactly the same as when you'd been here before. Always the same two notes. And you knew exactly what it meant.

As quickly and quietly as you can, you shove the rest of the bread up Daryl's shirt and shift yourself so you're sitting on the opposite wall to him. Drawing your legs up close to your chest and wrapping your arms tightly around your knees, you try to put as much distance between the two of you as the cramped cell allowed.

'What are you doin'?' Daryl breathes, startled by your sudden reaction.

'Negan,' you mouth silently. Daryl goes to move closer to you but you throw out a cautionary hand to stop him. 'No! He has to know he's won,' you whisper.

He searches you with an intense stare, trying to read you. You plead with him through your eyes, begging him to trust you and to understand. With a bit of luck he'll think you're planning on playing some game with Negan to get close to him and bring him down from the inside. What he can't know is that you lost yourself to the last game you and he played, and you're not willing to lose Daryl and Rick to another. Negan had won and that's all there was to it.

Daryl nods and you give him a small smile which he does not return. He slouches back against the wall and douses the lamp, tucking it in the corner behind him. You stare into the darkness for a moment, wishing you could kiss Daryl one last time before Negan took everything away from you.

_No, not everything_, you think to yourself. _They'll still be alive. Daryl and Rick will still breathe._

The whistling grows closer, now accompanied by the sound of heavy boots on the concrete floor. They stop just outside the door. It's dragged open to reveal Negan, Lucille occupying her usual resting place on his shoulder. As your eyes adjust to the light you watch his default shit-eating grin draw slowly over his rugged features, looking down at you and Daryl.

'Hey Dee!' He roars, making you jump. Dwight appears from a room further down the corridor and marches quickly to Negan's side.

'Yes, sir?' He intones monotonously, only briefly meeting your stare with blank, unreadable eyes.

'Ain't it about time you started havin' your fun with this one here,' Negan says playfully, flicking Lucille in Daryl's direction. 'I'm gonna have a word with my bride-to-be,' he drools salaciously, holding a hand out for you.

You ignore it and stand up, bringing yourself up to your full height. Without a glance at Daryl you walk past Negan, butting your uninjured shoulder against Dwight's. He grabs you by your knotted hair and pulls you into him, his mouth close to your ear and his gun pointing at your temple.

'Easy there, Dwight,' Negan chuckles. 

Daryl scrambles to his feet and shouts a string of profanities at Dwight. Negan elbows him hard in the gut, sending him stumbling backwards, coughing and spluttering.

'Play along with him,' Dwight whispers hastily in your ear, taking advantage of the commotion and hiding the movement of his lips in amongst your tangled hair. 'I have a plan to save you both. I swear on my wife's grave.'

'I said _easy_,' Negan growls menacingly at Dwight, ignoring Daryl's grunts and uttered curses as he falls to the floor, his injuries taking their toll. Dwight releases you and holsters his gun. 'She's mine. That piece o' shit on the floor there, you do whatever you wanna do an' don't hold back,' Negan grins.

Dwight strides over to Daryl. Negan wraps his arm tightly around your waist and half-carries you away from the sickening sounds of Dwight's boots meeting Daryl's body as his cries fill the air. You look back and the sight of him defenceless on the floor at the mercy of a man who may or may not be your only way out of here, breaks you.

'Daryl!' You scream, trying to tug yourself free from Negan's grip. Daryl's groans fall silent and you know he must have been knocked unconscious again, but Dwight continues to beat him. 

'DARYL!' You wail, tears cascading down your cheeks.

Your struggling grows weaker against Negan's immovable grip as once again you're forced to concede to the truth: Negan will continue to break Daryl until you comply. Daryl's pain is on you, and if he dies, his blood will be on your hands.

'Stop looking, darlin',' he says in a low voice.

As you round a corner you turn your head back and glance furtively up at Negan. His face is hard and his eyes cold. The rest of the walk is silent aside for your sobs, which you don't even bother to stifle now.

You'd cracked within a day of promising to give yourself completely to Negan in order to save the people you love. Negan knew you were only doing it for them, and that made them more vulnerable than ever. If you couldn't keep your feelings under wraps then they may as well have died in front of you yesterday.

'Now honey, I can't have you knowing your way around here,' Negan says patronisingly, the corners of his lips tugging into a sly half-smile that makes your hair stand on end. He brings you to a stop and pulls something from his jacket pocket. 'So I'm gonna have to put this on you.'

Before you have a chance to react, you're plunged into darkness.

'What the fuck d'you think I'm going to do? Leave a trail of fucking breadcrumbs?' You yell, your anguish and fear turning into anger as Negan secures the blindfold. 

You can feel him close to you, the heat of his body and the smell of leather, tobacco and whisky overpowering your senses.

'Oh I'm sure you, Daryl 'n ol' Pricky Boy have cooked up some half-assed fuckin' fairytale of a plan to kill me,' Negan mocks, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

'I promised to become the latest addition to your collection of fucking wives! What more do you want?' You spit.

You can almost sense Negan's expression hardening. He grabs your chin roughly with his gloved hand and suddenly you can feel his breath tickling your ear.

'I want you to _want _to marry me,' he murmurs huskily, inhaling deeply. He traces the tip of his nose down your neck, his lips almost brushing against your skin as he speaks in his deep, gravelly voice. 'See darlin', I ain't gonna force you to do anythin' cos' I'm not a fuckin' monster, despite what you might think. I ain't gonna marry you 'til you _beg _me to. An' not to save the life o' some other guy you _fucked_, but because you're so fuckin' desperate to belong to _me_, to have only _my_ fuckin' dick inside you, that you don't even remember what those other tiny-cocked fuckers felt like.'

'How can you possibly believe that the way to win a person's _respect_, let alone their affection, is through torturing them and the people they care about?' You hiss through gritted teeth, your hands balling up into fists at your side.

'Oh darlin',' Negan sighs, his hot breath playing across your skin and raising goosebumps across your entire body. 'At this point, their sufferin' is entirely on you, an' you know it.'


	22. Blinded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan's plans for you are yet to be revealed. You are left blind and tied, but the pain you keep expecting never seems to come. What comes instead disturbs you even more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it has been SO long since I last posted! I had to take a break for personal reasons, but now in this outbreak I have nothing to do but write for you lovely readers. I hope you still want to see where the story goes! I'll be posting as often as I can :) :)

You hear a door click open and Negan's heavy boots become suddenly muffled as he drags you into a room. A strange but pleasant scent you can't identify reaches your nose. Something is making a small, delicate ticking noise somewhere to your right.

'What are you going to do to me?' You whimper pathetically. All pretence and fight has dissipated as now, with only darkness in front of your eyes, the image of Daryl's beaten body lying helpless on the floor burns bright in your retinas. 'Negan, please...'

'Hush now, darlin',' he coos in a soft growl, releasing his grip on your waist.

You instantly reach for the blindfold, but Negan is trapping both of your hands in one of his before your fingers even touch the fabric. He steps behind you and brings your arms behind your back. In the absence of sight, your senses feel even more heightened. Every movement Negan makes seems to send a ripple through the air, making your skin prickle.

'You don't wanna see what's in front o' you doll, trust me on that,' he chuckles.

Negan wraps something silky around your wrists and you gasp when he tightens the knot. 'I'm sorry, is that too tight for you?' He murmurs in your ear, making you jump.

His breath tickles your neck as he lets out a low laugh. You can sense his proximity behind you, one hand tracing his fingers lightly up your forearm, the other stroking gently down your cheek. Your heart-rate quickens when you sense him stepping around in front of you. You don't know how to respond.

'You surprised me yesterday,' he purrs, grazing his lips with the light touch of a feather from your ear to the edge of your lips, leaving a trail of heat across your skin.

Heart beating ferociously against your ribcage, it takes every remaining ounce of strength to keep your legs from shaking.

'Breathe, darlin'. Breathe,' he whispers, suddenly pulling away.

You exhale sharply and a weight seems to lift from your lungs as you realise you'd been holding your breath for some time.

'Y-you've been wanting this a-all along...' you whisper, trying to catch your breath. 'H-how could I have surprised you?'

You wish you could see where he was; even a slither of light would be welcome in this blindness. Instinct urges you to both grope around and get an idea of your surroundings, and to stay rooted to the spot at the same time, not wanting to know what is in this room that Negan thinks you wouldn't want to see.

'Well, seein' as how fond you are of Rick, I figured you'd do anythin' to save his punkass. But Daryl? Now _that_ surprised me,' Negan chuckles, an edge to his voice that sends a terrified shiver down your spine. 'I mean, what is it about him? He's so... moody. You dig that, girl?'

The image of Daryl kneeling at Negan's feet returns more vivid than ever.

'See I know you like a man with spunk, 'cos you were drippin' for me once too — you remember that, Y/N?' Negan taunts. Then suddenly his hand is at your throat, his breath on your face and his nose touching yours. 'I said, do. You. Remember. That.'

'Y-yes! I... I remember,' you sob, unable to keep the tears from pouring out of your eyes. They leek down underneath the blindfold and stain your cheeks for Negan to see.

'Good girl,' he whispers, relinquishing you and stepping back. His muffled footsteps retreat somewhere to your right.

Your whole body is shaking now, the events of the last two days starting to take its toll. Daryl could be dead for all you knew. Rick will surely be soon to follow. The slim flicker of hope that Dwight had given you had burned out to leave you with nothing but the darkness Negan controls.

'Cos' I'll admit, Rick has some goddamn spunk in 'im. I saw that from the start,' Negan's voice is light and charismatic again. He could be talking about his plans for Christmas, while in the background your sobs rack over you untamed. 'Daryl is a stubborn lil' bitch too. But he's more of a... a loyal dog, than a leader.'

'H-he's a b-better man than you could ever h-hope to be,' you spit, gritting your teeth in an attempt to stifle your crying.

'I never claimed to be a good fuckin' man, honey,' Negan laughs. His voice has moved somewhere to your right and is quieter than before, as though he has his back to you. 'I'm surprised you can't see it yet.'

'S-see what?'

Negan doesn't answer. Softened footsteps approach you slowly, and the ticking noise grows louder. Something hard hits the back of your knees and knocks your legs out from beneath you. Your ass falls onto a chair. Negan's rough hand gently lifts your hair from your shoulders and something smooth snakes around your neck. Your head is pulled back to rest on the back of the chair, your face pointing towards the ceiling and your neck and chest left horribly exposed. The silky rope pushes uncomfortably against your windpipe, enough to reduce the oxygen flow just a little, but not tight enough to strangle you. You try to lift your head but it's impossible.

Then your heart jumps as, through the bottom of the blindfold, the tiniest sliver of light catches your eye. You can just about make out Negan's figure moving in front of you. His hands are at your thighs now, wrapping the same smooth tie over each leg in turn, binding them to the chair. The ticking noise is loud in your right ear now. Mind-numbingly regular in its incessant beat.

'See what, Negan?!' You yell suddenly, terror overcoming you.

He chuckles softly, his footsteps fading away. The door clicks open and his boots suddenly echo as they hit the hard concrete floor of the corridor outside.

'The fact that you've lost.' 

The door clicks closed and his footsteps grow fainter as he whistles those two notes. Again. And again. And again.


	23. Tick-Tock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan questions you about the plan of attack against him. You and you know what you have to do, and it's your last chance to save them.

Time passes without measurement. The ticking in your ear lulls you into a strange, trance-like state not aided by the slight restriction on your windpipe. Your body aches with the discomfort of your position and you find yourself inexplicably longing for Negan's return. The events since your escape run through your head on a loop; with each tick you hear the names of those you've managed to endanger. Rick. Daryl. Dwight. Rick. Daryl. Dwight. You can't allow yourself to think of the two Alexandrians who had died because of your audacity.

You're not even sure why Dwight is on your mind, given his betrayal. His minuscule act of mercy with the loaf of bread and allowing you and Daryl one night of peace was overturned the minute he laid his boot into Daryl's gut. And why should you believe him this time when he says he's on your side, after he betrayed you and Rick to Negan, almost getting him killed? 

Rick. Daryl. Rick. Daryl. Tick-tock. Tick-tock. How did it come to this?

At some point you manage to drift off, the extent of your exhaustion overcoming your extreme discomfort. But your sleep is restless and disturbed, the incessant ticking in your ear penetrating into your subconscious like a finger tapping on your forehead. 

Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Rick. Daryl. Rick. Daryl. What happens now?

The plan you had been hatching with Rick and the Hilltop seems so childish now. So hopelessly naive. Negan was right about one thing: we don't know that we've lost. Is it better to just give in? You can't see a way off of this train. The only way to keep Rick and Daryl alive is to marry Negan. To give in to him. But this time it would have to be real. No more acting, no more defiance, no more games.

You feel like the darkness and lust Negan had coaxed out of you before your escape belonged to a different person. After all the suffering you had endured since the world turned ugly, you realise you had turned ugly with it. Rick and Daryl had given you a glance back to what you used to be - someone who valued kindness and compassion. But it had been so long since you had experienced any kind of genuine warmth in another person that perhaps, having been so twisted by the nature of this world, you were better suited to someone like Negan after all.

Perhaps you didn't deserve kindness and compassion. Maybe Negan is a survivor because he gave into reality. Gave into the cold cruelty of the world by becoming cruel himself. Forfeiting the naive delusion that Rick and Daryl still hold onto: that love can keep you alive.

You don't know how many hours pass. Hunger and thirst are far at the back of your mind as the incessant ticking drags on, driving your thoughts around in circles.

Then suddenly you hear the sound of footsteps approaching outside. They stop outside the door. Your breathing quickens and your body tenses, waiting. The door opens and closes, you hear the click of a lock and the footsteps become muffled again. They approach behind you. The ticking seems to grow louder in your ears for a moment... and then it disappears. Blissful silence descends and a wave of relief momentarily washes away the fear of what might be in store for you next. You're panting hard, anticipation building as your visitor moves closer behind you.

Fingers gently untie the knot trapping your wrists, but this time you don't reach for your blindfold. You don't move. You say nothing. The fingers move next to the silk tie across your throat, freeing your neck. But again, you don't move. This all seems too unlikely. Like an animal aware of a predator, you remain stock still, trying not to provoke it while weighing up the threat. The visitor moves silently around in front of you, untying your legs with a gentleness that confuses you, knocking you off your guard a little. You remain motionless, waiting.

Then you smell something exquisite. You have no idea what it is but you'd never smelt anything like it. Your mouth instantly waters as you look towards the source. An involuntary groan escapes you when your neck complains at the movement.

'You okay?' Comes a horribly familiar, deep, gravelly voice.

Somewhere your brain registers fear, screaming for you to rip the blindfold off and make a run for it. But you're starving. And you know there's only one way you're going to get to eat.

'I'm fine. Please can I have some... sir?' You ask politely, remembering to add the title he'd like you using last time you were here.

'Of course,' he murmurs in a soft, low voice.

You reach out with your hands, waiting. But they remain empty. You want to ask again, anger bubbling inside you. You resist it, knowing you have to be patient. Knowing that, even though you're no longer bound, Negan was the one who dictates you now. 

The ticking echoes in the back of your mind. Rick. Daryl. Rick. Daryl.

'Answer me one question first,' Negan whispers, his voice suddenly right by your ear.

He breathes on the side of your neck and you feel the tingling goosebumps he leaves behind. Your breathing is fast and your heart hammers, but your mind is oddly calm as you slowly nod.

'What have you got planned with Rick an' those Hilltop bastards?' He murmurs huskily, his lips brushing lightly against your ear and sending a shiver down your spine.

'I convinced them that... that we could take down the Saviors,' you answer, your hands beginning to shake. Yet your mind remains clear, free of the fear coursing through your body. Rick. Daryl. Tick-tock. You had made up your mind. 'I said if we could find more guns, more people... we could fight you.'

'Hmm,' Negan rumbles, his deep voice resonating through you. The smell of food is tantalisingly close, as though Negan were wafting it directly under your nose. But that isn't why you keep talking. 'Go on.'

You take a deep breath and keep your voice as calm as you can.

'I told Rick where he might be able to find some guns, outside the Saviors' territory. Somewhere that might not have been scavenged yet,' you say quietly.

'An' where's that, darlin'?' Negan breathes, his lips now brushing across your cheek as he spoke. You suppress a shudder and ignore your shaking limbs.

'When I was travelling by myself, before I got shot,' you continue, your breathing steadying slightly. 'I came across a kids' day care centre. I hadn't eaten in days, and every place for miles that I'd scavenged had been picked clean. I thought, even baby food...'

Negan lets out a low chuckle. You ignore him and carry on, your courage increasing as your hands steady.

'It looked like it hadn't been touched. I guess no one would want to see what... what horrifying remains they might find in there. Except someone h-had. Someone had been holed up in there. There were stacks of tinned and dried food, blankets, torches, medicine... and guns. A whole lot of guns. And... a walker. A woman. She'd... she'd hung herself.'

Negan doesn't respond, so you take another deep breath and continue, trying to block out the feel of his breath on your face.

'I stayed there a couple of weeks 'til the food ran out. Packed all the medicine I could and set back off again. I didn't like to stay in any one place for too long.'

'You left the guns there?' Negan says, surprised. You nod.

'I'm no good with guns. I prefer knifes. Quieter and no need to worry about running out of bullets.'

'Good on you, girl,' Negan murmurs with a soft laugh. He pulls away. 'Keep talkin'.'

'I was wandering around for a while after that, before Rick found me in the woods—'

'D'you know who shot you?' Negan interjects. You shake your head. 'Hmm.'

'I don't know how many miles I'd walked before I got to that forest. It must have been close on a hundred. But I remembered what direction it was in from Alexandria, and what it looked like. The night you sent me back, I told Rick where he might be able to find it. I guess he left just after you took me away again, but you caught up with him before he found it. The people at Hilltop knew Rick was out looking for weapons, but that was as far as the plan went. Rick didn't get the guns, and you took away two of his best fighters. Now... now I don't know what they're going to do. I came with you to save Rick and Daryl, you know that. But I will be yours, Negan. In whatever way you want me. I won't act or fight anymore. Just please don't hurt them,' you finish, somehow managing to keep your voice level.

You knew now was not the time for helpless begging. Either Negan would keep his word, or he wouldn't. You wait for his reply, the silence pressing in on your eardrums as your heart-rate quickens. You don't know what else you can do. All you can hope is that your story keeps everyone safe, even if your betrayal will cost you their friendship.

'You see darlin', here's the problem with that story,' Negan says in a low growl. You freeze. 'I wanna believe that _you're_ the shit-stirrer in this lil' scenario. Rick was a good boy 'til you came along and got him all fired up hot 'n heavy. But the problem is Daryl. He's been a dick from the start.'

'I... I don't know,' you mutter, fighting to keep your composure. You desperately want to remove the blindfold and see the expression on Negan's face. He's so good at keeping his voice light and charismatic, you can't predict him. 'I only just met him a few days ago.'

'A few days ago?! An' you already fucked, jus' after fuckin' Rick?' Negan's laughs. 'You're a real _slut_, you know that? Woo, whatta gal you're turnin' out to be. I guess I'm gonna have to keep a close eye on you once we're married!'

You have to work to keep your face neutral. Rick. Daryl. They're all that matters now. You may have lost, but it doesn't mean they have to lose too. Silence fills the air once more. For several long minutes you sit there, imagining Negan watching you, rubbing his jaw with a gloved hand, trying to figure out his next play.

'How much does Daryl care 'bout you?' He says quietly, his tone unreadable and all the more dangerous.

'I don't know,' you repeat. Your heart sinks, knowing what Negan is about to ask from you.

'I need him in line. Now Rick...' Negan growls quietly, making small light circles on your thigh that cause you to shiver. 'Rick won't be a problem anymore.'

Your stomach drops.

'Don't fret, darlin'. He's still alive... for now,' Negan chuckles, his hand moving further up your thigh. 'No... he won't do anythin' while you're with me. I can see how much he cares 'bout you. An' jus' 'cos you'll be my wife doesn't mean I wouldn't kill you if I had to.'

You exhale sharply, relief flooding you like a cool, fresh breeze.

'Daryl is my concern here. I want him workin' for me. But if you're just a piece of ass to him, threatening your life won't do shit.'

'I'm more than that to him,' you cut in sharply. 'He wanted me to run. He was going to forfeit his life for me. We... we have something,' you trail off as Negan's soft caresses move even further up your leg, dipping down just below your centre.

You start to tremble and it takes everything in you to maintain your composure. You were so close now. So close to saving them both.

'Mmm, good,' Negan murmurs softly. 'I hope you're right. Here's what you're gonna do for me...'


	24. Deal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Negan make the final deal to save Rick and Daryl. But will it be enough?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, sorry I've been AWOL. Got sick with this virus. I hope you're all keeping safe! And I hope you haven't given up on this story yet, there is sooo much excitement to come :) :) :)
> 
> P.S. I'm on Wattpad too now! I'll be posting the same fanfics as on here (don't worry, I'll still keep uploading to here!). There's also an original story I'm writing, please check it out if you're curious! :) https://www.wattpad.com/user/LouiseMarieReeves

You gulp, waiting to hear Negan's instructions. Your entire body shakes, and it takes everything in you not to let your fear envelope your thoughts. But the worst part is over. You had betrayed Rick's plans to Negan in the effort to both gain Negan's trust, and to save Rick from making the biggest mistake of his life. It seemed foolish to have ever agreed to his plan to take on the Saviors in the first place. _The things people do for love_, you think to yourself. _Things that will only get people killed._

You realise now that you'd known all along in your heart that Alexandria did not stand a chance against Negan's army. They were outnumbered. Outgunned. And now Daryl was directly in the firing line too. It would be pointless to hope he might be able to escape again. Dwight's promise to get you out seemed hollow to you. He was the one who had betrayed you in the first place, almost getting Rick and Daryl killed as a consequence.

'Are you listenin' to me, darlin'?' Negan growls impatiently.

'W-what?' You stammer, having heard nothing he had been saying, lost in the reality of your betrayal. You could only hope that Negan would show Rick and Daryl mercy in accordance with your deal.

Negan sighs exasperatedly. 'Don't make me say it again, doll.'

'I'm s-sorry,' you mutter, desperate to stop your body's uncontrollable trembling.

'C'mon now, Y/N,' Negan murmurs softly. You can sense him bending down close to your left. He strokes the back of his finger lightly down your cheek, making you jump.

'Relax... take a deep breath,' he purrs in a low, husky voice, moving his hand up to stroke your hair. His touch is so unbelievably gentle you can't help but feel calmed by it.

'You did a brave thing tellin' me all that, Y/N,' Negan says gently, his tone uncharacteristically genuine.

You feel as though this change should spark fear in you, like he was a hunter trying to calm his prey before delivering the final death-blow. But all you feel is his hand on your hair, the faint tickle of his breath on your clammy skin, and the soothing of his deep voice.

'I appreciate it more than you know.'

Negan waits patiently for your breathing to steady, your shaking to ease. When you eventually find your voice again, you feel something strange. Something new. A sense of trust. You wait for the fighter side of you to leap into action, denying your emotions. But it doesn't come.

'Do you promise not to hurt them?' You ask in a small voice. Negan lets out a long, contemplative sigh, removing his hand from your hair.

'No don't,' you say suddenly. 'Please don't stop. It... it felt nice.'

Negan chuckles, and you picture him smiling as he resumes stroking your hair. Moments pass like years before he finally answers.

'No,' he murmurs. Your heart stops. 'I can't make that promise.'

'W-why not?' You stutter, your hands beginning to tremble again despite Negan's perplexingly comforting touch. 'We made a d-deal, Negan. Me for th-them,' you plead, your voice starting to crack.

'An' I'm a man o' my word, darlin'. But if they try anythin' that puts _my _men at risk, I won't have any other choice.'

'You d-do have a choice... please Negan,' you whimper. He sighs again.

'You don't understand how fragile the system is, doll,' he growls, still quiet and low but with a note of frustration to his tone that makes your body tense again. 'My people trust me to keep 'em safe. If someone threatens that and they get away with it, my people lose that feelin' o' safety and the whole thing topples.'

You're taken aback by the sense in his words, remembering back to when your old group was killed. How they had ended up fighting amongst themselves. How that had drawn the walkers. How half of them hadn't been there to defend us.

'How can I make sure they don't fight back?' You whisper.

'That's what I was tryin' to tell you before you zoned out on me, darlin',' Negan chuckles. 'Now I got a real problem. Cos' Rick won't do anythin' that'll put you or Daryl in harms way. But Daryl... he's a lose cannon ready to go off any fuckin' minute. He won't stop fightin' for you 'til there's nothin' left to fight for.'

You freeze, petrified at what his words might mean.

'Relax Y/N,' Negan coos, moving his hand down to cup your cheek. He strokes his thumb across it with such gentleness it hardly seems like him at all. 'I'm not gonna kill you.'

You exhale unsteadily, your breathing ragged and your heartbeat uneven.

'Sshh,' Negan hums, leaning closer to you until his nose lightly touches your cheek. His hot breath plays teasingly across your skin as he kisses you softly just beside the corner of your lips. 'I'll promise not to kill Rick or Daryl, if you can promise me somethin' in return.'

'A-anything,' you breathe.

You should have known that marrying Negan wouldn't be enough. He was right. Daryl would fight for you no matter what. Unless... unless you were no longer his. Not because you'd be married to Negan, but because he'd believe you felt nothing for him.

'You're wrong about Rick,' you mutter. 'He cares about his people as much as he cares for me. He will want to find a way to get me out and bring you down, even if I marry you.'

'Oh I'm not so sure that's true, honey,' Negan smiles. 'You didn't hear what he told me the day I took you away.'

You desperately want to ask him what Rick had said, but you think better of it.

'But you might be right. Especially now he knows you fucked Daryl too,' Negan mutters.

Tears sting in your eyes as shame rolls over you like a thundercloud.

'We need to convince them both,' Negan murmurs, his deep, gravelly voice sending vibrations through your body.

'Convince them of what?' You ask, already knowing the answer but needing to hear it from Negan's own mouth so that you can at least hope to trust his promise.

'That you're no longer theirs to save.'

You swallow hard, taking a deep breath in the effort to regain some composure.

'How?'

Negan sighs for a third time, this time sounding tired. Brushing his lips once more against your cheek, he says in a low voice.

'You leave that up to me.'


	25. Mirror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a glimpse into Rick's point-of-view, Negan's plan becomes even more ominous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one, but the next will be alllllllll Negan smut ;)

** _Rick's POV_ **

The moment Negan locks the door behind him, she rips off the blindfold. I shout for her, struggling desperately against the corse rope cutting into my hands behind my back and binding my legs to the wooden chair beneath me. But she doesn't seem to hear me.

Of course she doesn't, I know exactly how these rooms work, having used so many in my time. When Negan had dragged her in and tied her down, I had smashed my fists on the window and she hadn't heard a thing. Why this place had one of these, I cannot think. But Negan was sure to use it in the worst possible way.

I watch the confusion grow on her face as she looks around the interrogation room. A thick, soft rug had been laid across the floor from the door to the opposite wall. Directly beside her chair was a large table, on top of which was perched an old-fashioned alarm clock and a bowl of soup. 

With a quick glance at the door behind her, she tentatively stands, stretching for a moment before turning to the table. She pauses, then picks up the clock and throws it at the door through which Negan had just left. With a loud crunch, it smashes into pieces. Ignoring it, she snatches up the bowl and drinks the soup with such desperation, I wonder with a pang of despair how long it had been since she'd last ate enough food. Her clothes hang too loosely on her small frame, and her face is drawn, exhausted, streaked with tear-tracks.

But the fire I had fell in love with from the moment she'd come out of that coma... that was still there. Hidden beneath Negan's marks, she was still there. Whether she knew that herself was a different matter. She must have been thinking my heart would break if I found out she had betrayed our plans to Negan. But listening to her, I heard only the sound of a person who would do anything it took to save those she loved. And I knew deep inside me, that that was exactly what I would have done in her place.

Once she finishes the bowl, she looks back to the broken clock on the floor. After a moment's deliberation, she runs to it and hastily scrambles to pick up every last piece, dropping them into the empty bowl. Every few seconds her head snaps up to the door as though she's expecting Negan to burst through it at any moment.

Seeing her fear kills me inside. Half of me wants to smash this window down, take her into my arms and make a break for it, damn the consequences. But the other half knows that that will only get her killed. And nothing, not even whatever sadistic scheme Negan had in store... nothing could be worse than that. After checking the floor a dozen times, she gets up and places the bowl of broken pieces on the table. Looking around the room again, her gaze lands on the window in front of me.

Without thinking, I shout for her again, wriggling in the chair. But all she can see is a mirror. She edges towards it, eyes wide in shock as she scans her reflection. Her gaze is directly in line with mine, and all I can think is how much I wish she could see me, could know that she was not alone.

'Think Rick, c'mon!' I mutter, looking around the empty room for the hundredth time in search of something... anything that might break the glass. But all I have is the chair I'm strapped to.

The chair! Heart pounding, I start to rock from side to side. A small voice in my head reminds me that these windows were meant to be bullet-proof, but I quash it, unable to just sit there and do nothing. 

Y/N looks down at something in front of her, just below the window and out of my view. Her face pales. Biting her lip, she glances to the door before looking back at the mirror. A small blush creeps up her cheeks as she lifts a comb to her hair.

'Stupid... why am I doing this?!' She mumbles angrily to herself, checking her reflection with a revolted look on her face. Then after a few moments of consideration, she shrugs. 'Fuck it. I'm not gonna let him think I'm some scared little girl.'

There was that fire. That fight. I rock harder, unable to tear my eyes away as she presses a wet flannel over her face and neck before applying make-up - something she would never normally do. What was her plan? Was she going to seduce him into trusting he? Play the long game until she could get close enough to slit his throat in his sleep?

'No!' I yell, my voice cracking. 

I wasn't going to let her defile herself like that. There had to be another way. With one last shove I come crashing to the floor. Her head snaps up, staring at me through the window. _Could she have heard that? _I stupidly hope, knowing the answer.

But then she hastily drops everything in her hands and runs back to the chair, sitting with her legs crossed and her hands perched over her knees. Her breathing is fast and her eyes wide, but she manages to compose herself just in time for Negan to strut through the door on her side of the window, and on my side, for Dwight to drag Daryl in by his hair, a gun pointing to his head.


	26. Payment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You give yourself to Negan. Completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! A whole delicious load of Negan smut - WOO! I enjoyed writing this quite a bit, hope it was worth the build-up!!!  
Thinking of doing a Negan POV next - what do you reckon?

** _Reader's POV_ **

'I see you made yourself comfortable,' Negan's husky Southern drool follows him into the room. Watching his reflection in the mirror, you put on your best 'come-fuck-me' smile as he stands behind you.

'Well I would've preferred a bed... but I guess that table looks pretty stable,' you wink suggestively, meeting Negan's eyes in the mirror. He smirks, his expression fired with lust. But his eyes narrow suspiciously for a moment.

'Why the sudden change o' heart, darlin'?' He growls, bending down behind you so that his lips are just inches from your ear. Your breath catches in your throat, his intoxicating scent of leather, whisky and tobacco overpowering your senses.

'What do you mean?' You ask nervously, your composure breaking slightly. Keeping your eyes fixed on Negan's reflection, you do your best to recover. 'I've already agreed to marry you Negan. You know I'm yours.'

Negan lets out a low chuckle in your ear. His eyes flick up to the mirror for a moment before he stands up and moves to your side, holding his hand out to you. You take it tentatively, standing on shaking legs, Negan's body so close you're almost touching. Reminding yourself to be in control, to let him see you as strong and willing rather than scared, you raise yourself onto your tiptoes and lightly press your lips to Negan's.

He returns the kiss gently and slowly, savouring your taste. You realise that this is the first time you'd kissed him. Not when he'd kissed you and you'd tried desperately to push him away, but the first time you had initiated it yourself. His kiss is sweet, almost real. You find yourself wanting more, but he pulls away to soon, cupping your face in his hands.

'Where's Lucille?' You ask, confused, noticing that his right hand is unusually glove-free and the wire-wrapped bat is nowhere to be seen.

'I don't need her anymore, darlin',' Negan murmurs in a low voice, his face still so close to yours. 'Not when it comes to you.'

He moves in to kiss you again, but you pull away. Anger flashes across his face for a second but then he composes himself, waiting.

'What are we going to do about Rick and Daryl?' You say, trying to keep your voice even and not betray too much of your concern for them. Negan hadn't yet told you what his plan was to convince them not to try and save you.

'Don't worry doll, I've sorted it. They're not hurt,' he reassures you quickly, seeing the terrified look on your face. 'At least... not physically.'

Your heart sinks at the realisation that you must have broken their hearts by betraying them, by giving yourself to Negan. But it was the only way. In order to protect them, you could no longer be theirs to protect. You were on your own now. And for a reason you know you will be ashamed of tomorrow, the fight in you dies and you give in to Negan, allowing your darker side - your inexplicable craving for him - to take over once and for all.

Meeting Negan's eyes, you slowly move your hands to his belt. He watches you with an intensity that sends your heart racing in anticipation. Undoing his belt, your gaze flicks to his parted lips, subconsciously wetting yours with your tongue as you throw the leather aside and next unbutton his pants. Negan lifts your face to his, capturing your lips tenderly. You melt into him, tracing your tongue along his and delighting in the low moan that escapes him.

Letting go of your face but not breaking the kiss, Negan shrugs off his jacket and places his hands on your waist. His touch is so light and gentle on your skin that you feel your entire body tingle and shudder, pleading for more. With one hand you caress his growing bulge through his tight boxers, and with the other you slowly unbutton your jeans.

'Y/N...' he whispers, gently pulling away. He watches you through heavy-lidded eyes as you lift your top up over your head and remove your bra. 'Wow...'

You can't help but smile at the appreciative look on his face as he stands in front of you, drinking you in. Something seems different about him. Gentler. Perhaps you'd managed to convince him that you were his and he didn't feel the need to be so forceful this time.

You reach for his shirt and tug it off, warmth rushing between your legs at the sight of his toned, hair-dusted body. Lightly tracing your fingers along his tattoos, you kiss his neck. Negan lets out a soft moan, closing his eyes, his hands running up and down your back and making you shiver. Softly kissing your way down his chest and abdomen, you lower yourself to your knees. His hands entwine through your hair and he watches you with lust-filled eyes. Slowly lowering his boxers, you gasp as his impressive, rock-hard erection springs free in front of you.

'Wow...' you echo. Even though you'd seen him before, this time you could really appreciate it.

'It's all yours, baby,' Negan purrs, his breath quickening in anticipation as you lick your lips.

Holding Negan's gaze in yours, you run your tongue slowly up from the base of his cock all the way to the tip. Then, gently cupping and massaging his balls, you flick your tongue teasingly over the sensitive tip, listening to Negan's every moan and exhale.

'Ohh baby, who knew you could be such a tease?' He growls, his shit-eating grin only making you wetter.

'Who knew teasing you could be this fun?' You smirk, your confidence growing as you take control.

Grasping the base of his member with your other hand, you take him into your mouth, sucking on the tip and dancing your tongue across his flesh while slowly stroking him, drawing out your teasing for as long as possible. You inch your way down his shaft until he hits the back of your throat. When Negan hears you gag, he transforms.

'Ohhh fuck baby, yes!' He cries, tightening his grip on your hair and holding you there.

Your eyes stream and spit dribbles down your chin into your cleavage until finally he pulls himself out. Spluttering and gasping for breath, you expect Negan to grab your face and fuck your mouth right there. But instead he reaches down and gently strokes your face, eyes alight with desire. It only fuels your need to pleasure him.

Taking him back into your mouth again, you bob your head back and forth, letting him hit your throat with every thrust, massaging his balls with one hand and gripping his strong thighs with the other. Negan's noises become animalistic and you feel the heat and tension rising in your core in response, your pussy dripping and aching.

'Holy... fuckin'... shit... girl! You're... you're gonna... make me blow... my fuckin' load!' Negan pants, his moans deep and guttural.

You're desperate to reach down and relieve the longing in your core, but you know better. And you can't help enjoying making Negan succumb to the pleasure you're giving him.

'Stop,' he orders suddenly, his face wild. You release him with a pop and he pulls you up, crashing his lips over yours with a hunger that almost makes your knees give way.

'My turn,' he breathes as he breaks away.

Your face automatically breaks into a grin. Some part of you can't believe that you're excited to have sex with Negan, of all people. But by the time he had stripped off your jeans and panties, lifted you onto the table and knelt in front of you, his face level with your soaking pussy, you couldn't think about anything else.

'I've been waiting too fuckin' long for this,' he growls.

Before you have a chance to catch your breath, his lips are clamped over your clit, sucking and licking the bundle of nerves with punishing intensity. You already begin to feel your climax approaching as you throw your head back and almost scream with pleasure.

'Oh god, Negan! F-f-fuck...!' You wail, gripping the edge of the table with one hand and knotting your fingers in his hair with the other.

He moans against your pussy, the deep vibrations only heightening your pleasure. Negan grabs your legs and wraps them around his neck, encouraging you to pull him in even closer, trapping his face between your thighs. Just as you crash over the edge, your legs trembling and the room filling with your cries, Negan dips his mouth to your entrance, lapping up your juices as though you were the best thing he had ever tasted.

'Negan oh god! Negan!' You scream, lights popping in front of your eyes as your climax rolls over you with impossible intensity.

Carefully disentangling himself, Negan gets to his feet and looks down at you with a triumphantly smug grin.

'Are you warmed up?' He smirks, laughing at your flushed and dishevelled form as you try to catch your breath.

'W-what?' You pant, eyes wide and your own laugh tugging at the corners of your lips.

'Oh honey, that was just the pregame,' Negan purrs huskily, edging closer towards you with a devilish look in his eye that only restarts the fire in your core.

'What have I gotten myself into...?' You murmur with a grin, your gaze roaming hungrily over his phenomenal body, lingering on his rock hard cock still glistening with your spit.

'A whole fuckin' hell of a lotta fun, darlin',' Negan murmurs, stroking your face gently before grasping your hips and shoving his cock hard into your entrance.

'Oh FUCK!' You scream as Negan fills you balls-deep. Allowing you a moment to adjust to his size, Negan bites down into your neck, eliciting another half-strangled moan from you.

'Shit, Negan! Fuck me! Please!' You cry desperately, animal desire overpowering you and dragging you into a world of blissful carnal pleasure.

'Well, if you insist,' Negan chuckles.

Lifting you up off the table, you wrap your legs around his waist and pull him in deep. He wastes no time at all. Negan fucks you as though it were your last night on earth, pounding you so hard and fast that several times you feel as though you might black out. Clinging close to him, you scream and moan loud enough for the whole Sanctuary to hear. Negan's groans get rougher and more desperate as he pulls you towards another climax, biting and kissing your neck and lips, his face contorted in sheer ecstasy.

'YES NEGAN! OH FUCK, YES!' You cry, your orgasm thundering through you even harder than before.

'Oh fuck, Y/N! Oh my fuckin' god!' Negan grunts as with a last few slamming thrusts he chases his own climax, spilling himself inside of you.

For several minutes you cling to each other in silence, panting, hearts pounding so loud you can hear it. Then Negan places you gently on the table, sliding himself out of you and reaching for a couple of towels from the table beneath the mirror.

'Wow...' you sigh, wiping the sweat from your forehead.

'So what d'you say, darlin'?' Negan grins, wrapping a towel around his waist and handing you the other. 'Wanna go get married?'


	27. Turn-Around

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashing back to Rick's point-of-view, we see exactly what happens while Negan wins over his latest girl. Dwight has just dragged Daryl into the room in which Rick is being kept, watching through the one-way window as Negan makes the move to prove to them once and for all that Y/N is no longer theirs. But does Negan's scheme go to plan?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is all drama, bit of a twist... Definitely not done with the smut yet though, dw! ;)

** _Rick's POV_ **

'You twisted son-of-a-bitch, this was _your _idea?!' Daryl yells, lunging for Dwight.

'Just shut up a second, goddammit!' Dwight spits through gritted teeth, landing his boot in Daryl's diaphragm. He stumbles backwards, gasping for breath as the wind is knocked out of him.

Then Dwight does something neither of us could have expected. He hooks his gun into his belt and bends down to cut the ropes tying me to the chair, helping me up off of the floor. Daryl and I exchange looks. I can see the distrust on his face, his eyes telling me we should jump him now. In the few moments of silence where the three of us watch each other, waiting for the next blow, I run through all the possible scenarios in my head.

We could try to use Dwight as leverage to free Y/N, although it would be a gamble to assume that Negan cared more about Dwight's life than he did about the power he has over us through her. We could just kill Dwight right now, steal his gun and put a bullet in Negan's brain. But the odds of us all getting out of the Sanctuary alive were slim to none. We could wait it out, hope that our people come to rescue us. But when Simon had captured me, he had warned the Alexandrians that any move they made to get us out would result in my death, and there was not a single person in that group I didn't trust. So that was even less likely than the chance that Negan didn't have a dozen armed men standing outside the room in which Y/N was currently trapped.

I shake my head at Daryl. He glares at me for a moment, reading my silent instruction. Then he nods, clenching his jaw in the effort to stop himself from breaking Dwight's neck there and then.

'So let me get this straight,' I huff, keeping my voice as even as possible. 'You suggested this to Negan? You set this whole scenario up so you could get us all in a room together to... do what exactly?'

'It was the only way to get to both o' you without us bein' overheard,' Dwight says in a low voice, his hands still raised in surrender. 'Negan wants to...' he gulps, his face growing pale with disgust. 'To _show _you that she ain't yours to save no more.'

At that point both Daryl and I snap our heads to the window, watching in horror as Negan bends down behind Y/N still sitting in the chair, his mouth in her ear.

'I've already agreed to marry you Negan. You know I'm yours,' she says, staring at us through the window when all she could see is the reflection of her and Negan.

'No,' Daryl grunts, running at the window. 'NO!' He punches the glass over and over, but it doesn't even scratch.

'Daryl, stop!' I yell, yanking him back. He flails against my grip, hurling profanities and threats at Negan, who remains deaf and blind to anything but Y/N. 'It's no use, Daryl! That glass is bullet-proof! We had interrogation rooms like this at the station.'

After a moment he ceases, shrugging me off and pacing up and down in front of the window like a tiger trapped in a cage, his eyes fixed on Negan with burning hatred. With a huge amount of effort, I tear my eyes away from the sickening sight of Negan as he pulls Y/N to her feet, standing too close to her. I can't see what happens next, but I can still hear it.

'Where's Lucille?' Y/N asks, her voice timid, not her own.

'I don't need her anymore, darlin'. Not when it comes to you,' comes Negan's slimy drool. My hands ball into fists. I take a deep breath and force myself to stay calm.

'What are we going to do about Rick and Daryl?' Y/N says after a moment.

Unable to help myself, I look. Their faces are an inch apart, her big eyes watching Negan. Her voice was calm but her face read fear. She still cared. That was all the hope I needed. Daryl sees it too; he meets my eyes and nods, stopping his pacing and turning his back on the scene.

In two strides I'm in Dwight's face, holding him by the throat. He doesn't resist, but stares right back at me, his face determined.

'If you betray us again... I will kill you,' I growl through my teeth. He nods and after a moment I release him. Negan's voice floats through to us again.

'Don't worry doll, I've sorted it. They're not hurt. At least... not physically.'

Dwight turns to the door and presses a button on the wall just beside it. There's a short burst of static, then silence.

'For now we wait,' Dwight murmurs. 'Don't watch. You won't be able to hear anything now - I cut the coms.'

Daryl and I do as he says, exchanging another look agreeing to trust him despite our instincts. I thought Dwight had been on our side right up until the moment he let Negan take Y/N away from me again after she sacrificed herself in front of the whole of Alexandria to save us. I hadn't yet figured out how I felt about her and Daryl, but that would have to wait. I trusted him to do anything he could to keep her safe, and he trusted the same of me. Right now, that was all that mattered.

'Here's what's gonna happen. So we can figure out a _real_ plan, we need to get you and Y/N in a room together. And we need Negan to let her talk to you in private without him getting suspicious that somethin's goin' on. So here's what I suggest, an' you're not gonna like it.'

Daryl grunts his dissatisfaction. After a moment I nod. 'Go on.'

'I've gotta shoot you. Both of you,' Dwight says, watching us apprehensively as we process.

'The fuck?' Daryl growls, laughing humourlessly.

'Why?' I demand.

'Cos if you've been hurt after Negan promised Y/N that you wouldn't be, she'd have leverage.'

'There ain't no way Negan'd let her go back on their deal. Even if he breaks his side o' it,' Daryl mumbles dismissively, shaking his head. I can feel his gaze piercing the side of my head, trying to get my attention. I ignore him. I want to hear Dwight out.

'Leverage to do what?' I ask.

'She could demand you get treated here with our doctor. And that she'd get to visit you 'til you recover,' Dwight continues.

'You sure Negan would let that happen? He doesn't seem the type to give in to other people's demands,' I laugh bitterly.

'For her... I believe he would,' Dwight mumbles, watching Daryl warily.

'Meanin'?' Daryl growls threateningly, coming to the same conclusion as me.

'Look, I ain't never seen him let one girl get away with so much. Sure he threatened your lives, but he still let you live. After she agreed to marry him, she still resisted, choosin' to share a cell with Daryl rather than share with him. If it had been anyone else defyin' him like that, one of you would be dead by now. Or else she would. He ain't thinkin' straight when it comes to her.'

'You sayin' he... he has... _feelings_ for her?' I hiss incredulously, my face contorting in disgust.

'I dunno,' Dwight admits, shaking his head. 'But I'd bet my life he does.'

'Yeah but you're willing to bet _our_ lives_ -_ not to mention _her _life - on the chance that that sick bastard is even _capable _of feelin'?' Daryl shouts, his voice rising in anger.

'Daryl...' I mutter, stepping between him and Dwight before he lunges for him again. 'It adds up.'

Daryl glares at me in disbelief. 'No,' he growls, running his hand through his hair and resuming his pacing. 'No! It ain't worth the chance, Rick. Besides, what are we meant to do if we're both got fuckin' holes in us?!'

'That's just it,' Dwight quickly interjects. 'You could be here for weeks recoverin'. She could visit you, work out a proper plan with you, and Negan would have to let it happen. Whatever else he is, he's a man o' his word. He promised her neither o' you would get hurt under his watch. If you do, he's broken that promise and Y/N could demand just about anythin'. And yes, I'm willin' to bet he'd give it to her if it meant keepin' her as his wife. She'd just... have to be a convincin' one.'

I wince at the thought, but I push it from my mind. 

Daryl scoffs, 'Man o' his word, my _ass_.'

'And what would you do in this whole scenario o' yours?' I growl, stepping threateningly close to Dwight.

'I can work with Alexandria and the Hilltop. I'll be able to talk to Y/N, and she could get messages to you 'n vice versa. We could bring the Saviors down.'

'Why should we trust you?' Daryl spits, stepping around me and shoving Dwight hard in the chest. 'How'd we know you won't jus' shoot us an' let us bleed out. How'd we know this whole thing ain't all _Negan's _idea?'

'Because it'll be my head on the block when Negan finds out I jus' shot his latest project,' - he gestures to Daryl - 'and the leader of his biggest contributor,' he points to me.

'Why would you risk yourself like that?' I mutter.

'I got nothin' to lose no more,' Dwight says matter-of-factly. Moments pass, Daryl and I looking from each other to Dwight.

'I don't buy it,' Daryl growls, clenching his fists and moving in on Dwight.

'Wait,' I say. Daryl stops. I look at Dwight. 'I think we should try.'

I meet Daryl's furious glare. I can tell how much all of this goes against his instincts, but then I see just how much Y/N must mean to him: he steps down.

'She was willin' to risk her life to save ours,' I tell him in a low voice. 'I'm willin' to do the same to save hers.'

Daryl's expression gradually softens. 'Ain't no way I'm lettin' that motherfucker take her away for good... I'm in,' he growls, nodding at Dwight.

'Alrigh' then,' Dwight says in a low voice. 'Follow my lead and cover your ears.'

We both tense, thinking only of Y/N as Dwight raises his gun


	28. Fired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the aftermath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay this is short, but shit kicks off. Update will be soon - once I figure out what the hell happens next! Thanks for reading :D

‘So what d’you say, darlin’?’ Negan grins, wrapping a towel around his waist and handing you the other. ‘Wanna go get married?’

A smile just begins to tug at the corners of your lips when two deafening gun shots pierce through the air, coming from the other side of the wall on which the mirror hung. Leaping from the table, you look instinctively towards the source of the sound and find yourself staring at the reflection of Negan’s murderous face.

‘Get dressed,’ he orders, his tone low and sharp as he picks up his jeans.

‘What was that?’ You ask in a high voice, fear dousing the fire from your veins.

An awful terror descends over you, more intense than it should be. If someone from the Sanctuary had been shot, why would you care? But some deeper instinct senses something darker.

‘I said get dressed!’ Negan barks, making you jump.

You don’t hesitate, snatching your clothes up and shoving them on as fast as you can, your hands beginning to shake with adrenaline. Negan marches to the door to reveal a sweating, terrified-looking Simon. Your curiosity spikes with your fear.

‘What’s goin’ on?’ Negan snaps, shrugging on his white t-shirt and zipping up his black leather jacket.

‘I dunno, boss. It came from the observation room,’ Simon replies in a low, anxious voice.

‘Why aren’t you already fuckin’ in there checkin’ it out?’ Negan yells, his voice is wild, enraged. You’d never seen him lose control like this.

‘Stay here,’ he growls to you quietly. You nod, your legs already frozen to the spot before his order.

Negan storms away down the corridor, barking another order. At least half a dozen men walk past the open door, rifles in hand. You gawp - had they been there that entire time? Suddenly your fight pushes its way back into you legs, and you follow them, keeping your distance. Negan’s heavy strides were so loud in the echoing corridor that you didn’t have to worry about silencing your footsteps.

They round a corner. That’s when the shit hits the fan.

‘What the _fuck_ is goin’ on here?!’ Negan yells, the deep gravelly tone to his voice turning him from sexy to murderous in an instant.

You hesitantly peek your head around the corner, keeping your body hidden. Negan’s men block your view. You can hear grunting, as though someone was in pain. Two people, in fact.

‘They tried to jump me,’ Dwight’s voice echoes through the corridor, filling your blood with ice.

‘Like _fuck_ they did!’ Negan roars.

The air goes silent. You edge yourself closer, balancing against the wall as you perch on the tips of your toes to get a better look. Dwight stands in front of Negan, avoiding his piercing gaze while Negan bares down over him.

‘Am I _really _meant to believe that you couldn’t handle two unarmed men tied up like a pair o’ fuckin’ whores?’ Negan growls quietly, the murder in his voice somehow even more palpable when the decibels dropped. ‘You think I can’t hurt you now Sherry’s gone?’

Dwight betrays no sign of fear, but his eyes are still trained on the floor. Negan pushes his face up into his until they are nose-to-nose. Dwight doesn’t flinch.

‘Tony,’ Negan calls over his shoulder, his voice hard and flat. ‘Hand her to me.’

A large man saunters forwards, holding something you can’t see. Dwight’s eyes finally find their way up from the floor and settle on whatever it is the man now hands to Negan. His face drains, scars shining against his whitening skin, his eyes dilating in terror.

‘No…’ he breathes, unable to back away or tear his eyes from his approaching fate. ‘Please… Negan… I beg you.’

‘You know what Dee? I actually _don’t _wanna do this,’ Negan says in a sing-song voice so utterly at odds with the tension thickening the air almost to the point of suffocation. ‘I didn’t wanna do it when you let Sherry get away.’

He steps closer to Dwight, who stumbles backwards.

‘I didn’t wanna do it when you let my Y/N get away.’

Another step. Dwight shakes his head frantically, transfixed in horror at the object in Negan’s hand. You didn’t have to guess what it was that he was seeing.

‘But this time…’

Something swishes through the air in a blur, landing with a crack on Dwight’s head. He drops to the floor like a rag doll. Your throat closes up around a scream.

After a moment, Dwight somehow manages to haul himself to his feet. A dent caves into the side of his head, his blonde hair tinged scarlet. His eyes roll in their sockets and blood drips into his open mouth. But he brings himself to his full height and stares Negan straight in the eyes.

‘_This _time…’

Negan recoils his arm like Dwight’s face was a baseball hurtling towards him in the field.

‘_I got_’ — WHACK — ‘_no_’ — WHACK — ‘_choice!_’ — WHACK. WHACK. WHACK.

You lose count after a few minutes. At some point your legs must have buckled because you look down to find your knees on the floor. But this was just the warm-up. The main act of the show was yet to follow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> P.S. I've started writing a new original story! It has a lot of the same kind of themes/writing style as my fanfics (yes, will include smut). Please check it out if you've enjoyed my writing! I'd be forever grateful :D https://www.wattpad.com/story/228256738-taboo


	29. Cracks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With a glimpse into Negan's mind, the reality of his plans for Y/N take an unexpected turn.

** _Negan’s POV_ **

I stare down at the bloody mess that used to be my friend. Thick silence pierces my eardrums over the thundering of my heart in my temple. Sensing terrified eyes on my back, I know I need to regain some appearance of control before I face them. The anger ignited by Dwight’s betrayal is challenged now by a small spark of fear. I had let my guard drop, and half a dozen of my men had just witnessed it. _But_, I think to myself, _at least the punishment was right_. Dwight had given me no choice - even he had known that.

So what could have prompted such a sacrifice? Sure, I had in the past suspected him of working in secret for Rick’s ever-dwindling group. However, that suspicion had been wiped the moment he told me that he’d heard from one of the more terrified Alexandrian’s that Y/N had been stupid enough to fuck that prick. It had crossed my mind before that Dwight might be a little harder to intimidate now that Sherry was gone, but perhaps I had underestimated how fragile was his will to live in one, unmelted piece.

Then suddenly that spark of fear catches flame as understanding dawns over me. Dwight had shot them so that they would have to be treated here with Carson. He knew that Y/N would demand it, and that I would have no power to stop it. Unless… no. I couldn’t do that to her.

Hatred flushes through my veins at the realisation of just how much control this whore had over me. How could I have let myself go like that? Dwight must have known - or at the very least suspected - that my interest in her went beyond the need to keep Rick and Daryl in line. When I had first taken her, I had seen only the fun of having another slut underneath me, with the added bonus of punishing Rick for Daryl’s disappearance.

But Y/N had a fight in her not even I could put out. At first it had infuriated me beyond compare. Then, seeing her give herself up for those two dickwads had demonstrated an even more untameable strength. The strength of her love for those who matter to her. I could hardly remember the last time I had seen that in a person. Certainly not since the world had changed and left only the weak and ugly behind.

She had been moments away from giving herself to me completely, choosing to forget her companions in the knowledge that what she was about to do would keep them safe, while also keeping them forever out of her reach. And then Dwight’s bullets had pierced their thighs.

The image of Y/N’s scar from the bullet wound that had brought her to Alexandria flashes before my eyes. A cold emptiness threatens to steal over me. There was no way she wouldn’t want them to be treated here. No way she wouldn’t need to see them, to watch over their recovery. And just like that she would slip away, falling through my fingers like I was trying to hold on to water.

I swallow hard and consume myself with the facade of cool annoyance.

‘Someone clean this shit up,’ I growl, with just the right amount of tired exasperation behind my tone, as though this were nothing more than a minor inconvenience to me.

My men scramble around like rabbits in headlights, not daring to meet anyone’s eyes. I ignore them, strolling over to the two men slumped on the floor clutching their spewing legs. Crouching down in front of them, I lift Lucille and run my gaze along her as though I were delighted by the sight of Dwight’s brains staining her wires. Rick’s eyes adopt the same the look as when I had murdered his gigantic ginger. Daryl’s regard me with pure, sickened loathing. Perfect.

‘I do _not _appreciate you shittin’ over all my great ideas!’ I chime playfully, flashing them a grin and ignoring the churning in my stomach as the thought of what Y/N will do when she finds out tries to push its way to the front of my mind. ‘I make all this effort to put on a good fuckin’ show for y’all, an’ you go ahead an’ ruin the best fuckin’ bit!’

Their faces harden, but not nearly enough.

‘You didn’t see any o’ it, did you?’ I growl, allowing my expression to fall into hard threat. ‘Which one o’ you dicks is gonna tell me what the fuckin’ hell happened in that room? Actually…’ I pause, licking my lips with a deliberately sadistic smile as I gaze back at my blood-soaked Lucille.

‘It doesn’t matter any fuckin’ more. Lucille got her way today, an’ _that’s _what matters. So the _real_ question is…’

Pausing again, I stand up and bear down over them, twirling Lucille in my hand. They cringe back slightly as Dwight’s blood flicks across their face.

‘What the fuck ta do with you _now_.’

‘NO!’ A voice pierces the air in a petrified scream. ‘DON’T HURT THEM!’

I turn around slowly, willing my expression into one of cool indifference and forcing the dread-soaked bile to return to my stomach. Y/N ploughs through my men and lunges at me, grabbing my jacket and begging me in between cracked sobs to spare them. Gently as I can, I tug her hands from me and push her back a step, letting my arms drop to my sides somewhat begrudgingly.

‘I ain’t gonna hurt ’em, doll,’ I assure her in a low voice.

It’s softer than I had intended, but the crushing despair in her eyes as she looks from me to them shoots a spike of pain through my chest. I do my best to ignore it, hating myself for even allowing it to happen.

Once she understands that I’m not about to kill them, Y/N drops to the floor in front of Rick and Daryl, her mouth opening and shutting as though she were trying to find the words to say while tears streamed endlessly down her cheeks.

Then she looks back up to me. Behind the hurt and anger, I see the shadow of something that sparks the smallest flicker of hope inside me. A tiny part of her believes that I did not order the attack on them. Whether she realised yet what my plan for them had actually entailed, I did not yet know. So I make the decision to grasp onto that little bit of her that still believed in the truth of the promise I had made her.

‘Help them,’ she whimpers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking of having one or two more chapters in Negan's POV at some point throughout this story - what do you think?


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